Why am I so arrogant..

[Carlyle]

Not even kidding. In one night, I managed to have fun then piss off the people that matter to me most.

Oh god, the school dance. It was fun and all, but fuck if it could be NORMAL and go smoothly. Sure, I hung out with friends and we danced, but my god.. I can't stand it, the guy I like was making out with this girl that he was just going to the dance with. I feel so immature, but part of me is just too stubborn to let go and realize that I'm wasting my time.

I keep trying to tell myself, its okay, things get better. But things just get worse or they don't improve at all. I don't understand anymore. I felt like my mind was finally stable, that my head wasn't so messed up. Lately, I doubt so much. Like my best friend who constantly thinks "everything happens for a reason". I really just want to know why me, why not someone else. I know some people that have things too easy, I shouldn't have to deal with some of this while life is a paradise for them and everything is handed to them on a silver platter.

I know my issues are trivial compared to some of the other members.. but the level of what I can tolerate is slim lately. Too much is going on and freshman year is coming up for me soon, so I can't think right lately. Still, I need to let some of it out every so often or I'd blow up on all the wrong people. I already did that to two people tonight and its making me feel like shit. That's way more than I'd ever want to do, so.. whatever. Little rant, ignore it like most people will.

[Fractured Silhouette]

Why me? Is a good question. Many people ask themselves that very question. The straight answer is: it's not you. It's life. Life is just a series of random events affected by the choices of people such as you and me. Believe it or not, life's not picking on you. It didn't choose you and decide "I'm going to make his life suck for the fun of it". Admittedly sometimes it can feel that way. We just have to try and make the best of what is given to us and it doesn't matter who has things easier or harder. You, as a person, have every right to feel hurt/pissed/sad, etc etc. And people will be there for you to vent at, and we won't ignore you.

If you want things to get better, your probably going to have to work at it. Things don't usually get better by themselves, if they do, that's awesome to. Find some people who you feel will make you feel better, such as other friends, or someone.

Also, a good way to deal with emotions: watch more Dick Figures. :D