Ex-girlfriend

[whiterecyclables94]

umm sry to change the subject but i need some help......my ex girlfriend had lied to me and i didn't trust her anymore and she loves me so much that she cut herself for lying to me....i love this girl with all my heart and she loves me the same way but the whole cutting thing its fine with me but i made her promise never to do it again and she said she wouldn't (instead she would break rubber bands whenever she felt like cutting herself) but i just dont know what to do what do you guys think


thanks for the help

[Serenity]

Well she said she wouldn't, so that's at least something. Is this the first time she's cut before? If it is, I think there's a good chance she'll stop. If not, I've learned from personally dealing with people who've made it a habit to never take their word for it and ask them constantly. Either way, just keep checking on her, let her know you're there to support her always, and do your best to help her feel better about herself.

[whiterecyclables94]

It was her first time, i showed her that she can talk to me about anything and now she believes that...i talk to her every night and thanks for the advice i really appreciate it

[Sapphire]

She's lucky you are there for her. Otherwise this whole thing would only get worse.
Still ask her occassionally whether she has done it though. Just for peace of mind.

[Serenity]

It was her first time, i showed her that she can talk to me about anything and now she believes that...i talk to her every night and thanks for the advice i really appreciate it

I'm glad your relationship is looking better :) And you're quite welcome for the advice :daisy:

[whiterecyclables94]

UGH SHE DID IT AGAIN ;( im so sad i cant believe it ugh is there anyway i can help her i love her so much and im afraid im guna have to like break up with her cuz i got back together with her like 2 days ago UGH UGH UGH!!! is there anything i can do i will do anything i dont wana break up with her

[Fiending_the_freedom]

ok so i've been the girlfriend in this situation b4, normally i'd say dont make her promise to stop cutting, but my boyfriend at the time did, and i didnt completly stop but i only cut three times in the three months we went out, and b4 that i cut amost everyday.

all i can say is that if you dont see any improvemnt then worry, but ask her b4 you how often she would cut, and remeber that.

tell her, when she lies or anything like that, cutting isnt how it works, when your in a relationship, its both your problems, you work it out together, talk abotu why she lied and how you can fix the trust in your relationship. she has to talk to you when theres problems in the relationship, and let her know that when she cuts herself over the relaitonship problems,, its like shes cutting you too, because she didnt give you the chance to work on it, she made the desion by herslef, and a relationship takes two.

( the reason i empisize on "cutting when dealing with the realtinship problems" and not cutting when depressed is because my boyfriend would tell me to call him when i'm depressed and want to cut, but it would never work for me, but when i wanted to cut over something i did to him or something, we'd talk about it, and it would help.

hope i helped

[Serenity]

tell her, when she lies or anything like that, cutting isnt how it works, when your in a relationship, its both your problems, you work it out together, talk abotu why she lied and how you can fix the trust in your relationship. she has to talk to you when theres problems in the relationship, and let her know that when she cuts herself over the relaitonship problems,, its like shes cutting you too, because she didnt give you the chance to work on it, she made the desion by herslef, and a relationship takes two.

Pre-cicely my thinking. And whatever you do, don't break up with her, PLEASE. The very last thing you could do to help her, is abandon her.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

when she relapses, don't get mad at her. instead, try and understand why, and try and help her through it. sometimes the pressure of knowing someones going to be hurt and not mad can make them reconsider.