Feel like a burden to others.

[TheGuyNextDoor]

Recently I've been almost manically depressed, and I don't know why. It's caused me to lose my friendship with my former best friend, and several rows have broken out with my parents because of it, one ending with me nearly committing suicide. I think the only reason I didn't and won't is that I couldn't stand to think how my little brother and sister would react to finding my limp, lifeless body somewhere, and that reason is getting even less convincing by the minute. I've been less sociable, and lost my appetite, and often just sit and stare into space on my own or think about how much of a shambles the UK, my home, is in. I've been addicted to listening to Nirvana, as Kurt Cobain was a genius and produced music I can relate to. I wonder why I don't just throw myself off a bridge and end it once and for all.

[xXoblivionXx]

Please don't kill yourself. You are depressed but please don't end it all. Killing yourself would just pass the pain onto your little brother and sister, I don't think you want that. I know how it is to feel like a burden to the world but it things can only get better. I really want you to know that you are worth living. The UK wouldn't be the same without you. Try to find happiness in the smallest places and work your way up :) You can do this! I'm here if you ever want to talk.

[Fractured Silhouette]

Well a good first step might be to explain how you feel to someone and getting yourself some help and support. (Posting here was a good start though :)) Perhaps explain to your parents how you feel and try to make them understand that you didn't mean to cause these arguments. If not your parents then perhaps your school counselor or your family doctor?

I'm sure your not really a burden to others, that's just the negative thinking talking. Try to think positively. But you should really try to get help because you deserve to feel better and not feel this way.

Anyway, hope this helped....

[Breakeven]

coz things get better , think about how many people that cares about u like ur sis and bro , how they gonna live knowing ur gone , try to go out , do something new
things might be hard now but plz dont give up <3

[TheGuyNextDoor]

Thanks for the replies, it really helps to know that someone out there cares if nothing else. I will talk to my parents in the morning as it's 10pm atm.

[xXoblivionXx]

Okay goodnight! Like I said, I'm here if you ever want to talk :)

[Fractured Silhouette]

Good luck

[riotroger]

DISCLAIMER: If I say anything offensive it's not intentional or directed at anybody, its just my personal opinion.

Suicide to me is a very selfish act, a cop out. Ending the pain like that is the easy way out. You relieve yourself from something very painful without having to confront it. Sure it makes you feel better (cause you don't feel anything anymore) but think about the repercussions it causes. All the people that care about you (family, friends, etc) will be devastated, and it will change their lives forever. Your parents will never get to see you grow up, your siblings will miss you forever, and your friends will have lost someone close to them. All in all it's going to hurt a lot of people. I'm not saying you have to be a selfless person, but should try and take into consideration who's lives your gonna screw up if you were to go through with it. Sure there are specific scenarios in which suicide may be the only option, but your case is absolutely not that kind of situation.

I don't know why you're depressed so I can't say I understand completely, but I do know what it's like to feel as if everything is so difficult that I can't overcome it and would rather end my life than face what my problem is. I contemplated killing myself at one point and came pretty close, but I'm so glad I didn't go through with it. It took a couple years to get over what I was depressed about, and after changing what made me upset I felt 10x better about myself. The best way to overcome what you're going through is to stand your ground and face it.

I know it may not seem easy to get out of your funk, because it isn't. You just have to give it your best, and never give up.

That's all I have to say... if you wanna talk or something, I'm here (as are many others on VT). There's always someone here to talk to, you're not alone :D.

Feel better man, I really hope you don't go through with it :/

[TheGuyNextDoor]

Spoke to my parents, they're going to do all they can to help me get through this, an you guys are right - suicide will just pass my troubles on to those close to me, and that's not what I want at all.

[Fariko Draw]

Hope it goes well mate, if you ever need any help or a chat im here :).

[InstantSerenity]

I know how you feel :| Ive been slowly drifting away from the people I THOUGHT cared for me. Its not like before that they would talk to me everyday. I feel hated, betrayed, and sometimes trapped. But mostly alone. The only thing YOU can do is move on, OR try to fix it by talking to them about the situation. But if they seem to argue, or disagree then let it be. Focus on things you love to do, instead of thinking about how you're alone or you lost them. Listen to music, meet new people and think positive. Hope everything works out xx

[ImCoolBeans]

I've felt like a burden to others for a good part of my life, and it's not a good feeling at all. Feeling like nobody wants you around, that you are constantly annoying your friends and family, like your presence and connection is totally unwanted. I've started to get out of feeling like that, but it's something that's stuck with me for a long time and something that I still feel from time to time. I've come to realize that most of that feeling is just paranoia, and that people often don't feel that way about you, even if you think they do.

The fact that you were able to talk to your parents, and that they are willing to help you get through this, shows that you can get through this. You were strong enough to reach out for the help, and thats not something that everybody is able to do. I've never been able to reach out to my mom when I've been feeling depressed and I doubt that I ever will. You're strong, bud, and I admire you for that.

You have the will and desire to live, these thoughts are just clouds casting a haze over it. With their help I know that you'll be able to get through this. Be safe, if you ever need anything you know that we all are always here for you, whether it's a post or a PM, we're all within reach.