dinogoesrawr
May 13th, 2012, 11:02 AM
Newbie here whose really confused about my sexuality. Sorry for the long post but these points are important.
Live with (older) sisters and mum (no dad since 2 years old and no close male support either). Grown up in a men are evil, sex before marriage is bad, relationships and love is fake environment, your a whore if you date more then 2 people etc. :S
Late puberty, didn't even know what sex was till like 14, first wanked at 15. Wanked to a porn video where this guy was wanking (no sex). Became 'fixated' on that particular website... slowly branched out to other gay porn, then bi porn, then str8 porn. still watch all of it. none is better then the other tbh. i don't watch ANY porn. i follow particular (male) pornstars/websites and stick to those. its de-stressing for me :) i also find it easier to find gay/bi porn then str8 porn... maybe because of the way the gay community is organised.
I was fascinated with males who had beards. when i could grow my own i wasn't fascinated anymore. I was fascinated with being cut. When I was circumcised I lost interest in penises completely. Then I was fascinated with tall men. I grew to 6ft and lost interest. Then I was attracted to muscled men/defined bodies and still am. Im getting more muscular and defined soon so am now losing interest in that too. haha I also like men with deep voices... because my voice is abnormally high (getting surgery soon to lower it). So yea what I don't get - is do I really like men or am i just idolising all the pornstars etc and trying to be like them?
My fantasies. always to 'top' the man/woman. never wanted to get fucked up the ass. don't even like fingering myself. never want to suck a penis. kinda worried about eating pussy also because idk how. :S so yea I'm always the 'top'. when i close my eyes and imagine stuff I'm always sticking my junk in someone - now mostly women tbh.
I have never had sex, kissed anyone, had oral - nothing at all. I signed up to many sex dating websites - 90% for man on man sex - talked to several guys - even wanked on cam with some - didn't do anything for me tbh. I find it way way easier to cum over porn. I have met many attractive men online but never gone for it no matter however 'perfect' they are. Tbh I can't find good free sex dating for men and women (all the ones I found are expensive lol) so maybe thats the reason. Idk.
I also considered some escorts. If I don't know something, I want someone to teach me. I found some really good looking escorts (male). Again, never went for it. One escort offered to meet me free (he found me attractive). Never went for it. Looked for female escorts also - too expensive. lol but yes brazilian women and blondes also do my hormones in. :D
Can someone shed some light on this please? What am I? What should I do?
Live with (older) sisters and mum (no dad since 2 years old and no close male support either). Grown up in a men are evil, sex before marriage is bad, relationships and love is fake environment, your a whore if you date more then 2 people etc. :S
Late puberty, didn't even know what sex was till like 14, first wanked at 15. Wanked to a porn video where this guy was wanking (no sex). Became 'fixated' on that particular website... slowly branched out to other gay porn, then bi porn, then str8 porn. still watch all of it. none is better then the other tbh. i don't watch ANY porn. i follow particular (male) pornstars/websites and stick to those. its de-stressing for me :) i also find it easier to find gay/bi porn then str8 porn... maybe because of the way the gay community is organised.
I was fascinated with males who had beards. when i could grow my own i wasn't fascinated anymore. I was fascinated with being cut. When I was circumcised I lost interest in penises completely. Then I was fascinated with tall men. I grew to 6ft and lost interest. Then I was attracted to muscled men/defined bodies and still am. Im getting more muscular and defined soon so am now losing interest in that too. haha I also like men with deep voices... because my voice is abnormally high (getting surgery soon to lower it). So yea what I don't get - is do I really like men or am i just idolising all the pornstars etc and trying to be like them?
My fantasies. always to 'top' the man/woman. never wanted to get fucked up the ass. don't even like fingering myself. never want to suck a penis. kinda worried about eating pussy also because idk how. :S so yea I'm always the 'top'. when i close my eyes and imagine stuff I'm always sticking my junk in someone - now mostly women tbh.
I have never had sex, kissed anyone, had oral - nothing at all. I signed up to many sex dating websites - 90% for man on man sex - talked to several guys - even wanked on cam with some - didn't do anything for me tbh. I find it way way easier to cum over porn. I have met many attractive men online but never gone for it no matter however 'perfect' they are. Tbh I can't find good free sex dating for men and women (all the ones I found are expensive lol) so maybe thats the reason. Idk.
I also considered some escorts. If I don't know something, I want someone to teach me. I found some really good looking escorts (male). Again, never went for it. One escort offered to meet me free (he found me attractive). Never went for it. Looked for female escorts also - too expensive. lol but yes brazilian women and blondes also do my hormones in. :D
Can someone shed some light on this please? What am I? What should I do?