back i guess..

[beag_amhain]

so i know i never really left but i kinda took a break, n i was going really good! went almost 4 months without cutting :D
but then things went way down, n i started again
nothing serious until friday, i did 3 deep slashes on the top of my hand n told everyone 'i scratched it off a fence', i had to go get stitches n i know very few people believe my story, but they want to believe it so they will
ive never done it in such an obivious place before, but its now like i cant stop
i jus wanna keep cutting, but im stopping myself, how i dont know, but it normally works so thats good...
just got to keep going right?

[Desuetude]

It's amazing that you made it 4 months. That shows you that you have the will power and strength that you can stop. 120 days free, you should be so proud of yourself.
Sure everyone has setbacks and relapses and you shouldn't feel guilty for having them because quitting "cold turkey" as such will only work if you have immense willpower.
The last bit im not sure if I understand right. The things you do to stop yourself are working so you'e not cutting or the cutting is working? Just pick yourself back up because you know you can now. You have proven that you can do it and it's okay to slip up as long as you dust yourself off again. I believe in you and you should as well because you can beat this.