my sig

[Texas warrior]

Well I wanted to know what people thought of a rednecks attempt at a poem, my sig.

[Scooby Dooby Drew]

It's not bad. I rather like the anaphora you have going, the repeating line. The rhyming pattern is a bit weird (AAABBCC), and you rhymed 'alone' with itself, which actually isn't too bad in this case since it works. Also, the third line suddenly switches perspectives to the "heart-broken warrior", and it flows a bit awkwardly. I can see what you were trying to do with this, but I'm not so sure if it worked. Another problem arises when you try and read this aloud; the "heart-broken warrior" anaphora starts sounding a little repetitive after 6 lines of it. Really, I think all of these problems could be solved pretty quickly; just delete the third line. It switches perspectives somewhat awkwardly from a 3rd person narrator to an actual character in the poem; it ruins a potential nice and round rhyming scheme (AABBCC); and it stretches out that nice anaphora into simple redundancy.
Other than that, it seems pretty good. I personally would say "heart-broken warrior" with a hyphen, because that looks better to me, but that's really a matter of opinion.

[Breakeven]

i like it :D