Syvelocin
April 13th, 2012, 11:43 PM
I hate to make two threads in the psych ward at once but here it goes.
I thought I was doing pretty fine you know. I kinda rebounded though. And I got a referral to an ED clinic. So now I'm dropping the second job I had so I can do Intensive Outpatient at this clinic. And I really don't know what to make of it. I'm not starting for two weeks because A. I want to give my boss a chance to find a replacement, and B. I'll be out of town next week.
A great deal of it is group therapy. And I absolutely hate group therapy. Along with family therapy, those are the two types I have really bad connotations with. Not that family therapy is a concern now. But both of those terms make me think of my hospitalizations, and that's not a fun remembrance.There's one session they were talking about me doing utilizes exposure therapy for food anxiety and between that and group I don't think I can handle it. Food's a tough issue for me. I'm very open about self-harm, bipolar disorder, suicide, drugs, all that jazz, but I seriously will completely shut my mouth if I'm forced to talk about it. I was happy my evaluation was paper-based, so I just filled out an hours worth of tests and they showed me the results. Cause I just don't like talking about food and my weight. Never have, actually. As a child I used to lie about my weight all the time even. Before I had an issue with food.
I'm just anxious, you know. It's been two years since I did anything like this for any of my psychiatric problems. Haven't even been on medication since my last hospitalization in '10. And now as well as my prior psychologist, I've got an ED therapist, nutritionist, as well as six hours of group therapy every week. And it's been difficult even convincing my health insurance to keep paying for Leslie...
I thought I was doing pretty fine you know. I kinda rebounded though. And I got a referral to an ED clinic. So now I'm dropping the second job I had so I can do Intensive Outpatient at this clinic. And I really don't know what to make of it. I'm not starting for two weeks because A. I want to give my boss a chance to find a replacement, and B. I'll be out of town next week.
A great deal of it is group therapy. And I absolutely hate group therapy. Along with family therapy, those are the two types I have really bad connotations with. Not that family therapy is a concern now. But both of those terms make me think of my hospitalizations, and that's not a fun remembrance.There's one session they were talking about me doing utilizes exposure therapy for food anxiety and between that and group I don't think I can handle it. Food's a tough issue for me. I'm very open about self-harm, bipolar disorder, suicide, drugs, all that jazz, but I seriously will completely shut my mouth if I'm forced to talk about it. I was happy my evaluation was paper-based, so I just filled out an hours worth of tests and they showed me the results. Cause I just don't like talking about food and my weight. Never have, actually. As a child I used to lie about my weight all the time even. Before I had an issue with food.
I'm just anxious, you know. It's been two years since I did anything like this for any of my psychiatric problems. Haven't even been on medication since my last hospitalization in '10. And now as well as my prior psychologist, I've got an ED therapist, nutritionist, as well as six hours of group therapy every week. And it's been difficult even convincing my health insurance to keep paying for Leslie...