TraceOfExistance
April 9th, 2012, 11:12 PM
Not sure if this is the correct place to be posting this, but I need to let it out somehow.
I recently moved to a new school this year, and it's been going pretty well despite some few things (see my other thread). A little bit into the year I've noticed that one of my friends is way into drama. She loves it, needless to say. I made a vow to make sure I never got caught up into any drama. Well, thanks to said friend I've been in about 3 or more different drama fights that I didn't need to be in. That I had no part of. That she dragged me into.
I've also had serious anger problems for a while. My mother passed them off as being a normal teenager or wanting attention. After a recent life-changing accident, my mother and aunt decided it would be a good idea to get me a counselor to talk with about my problems. I went for my first visit and have never went back. I've been diagnosed with PTSD, Depression, and Bipolar Disorder. My mother refuses to get me the medication I need, when she's taking enough for the whole neighborhood.
I thought my anger problems have been getting better, but I was wrong... Seriously wrong. Where it used to take me a bit to get angry, now I fly off the handle at any little thing. I've been suspended one time at school because of me getting in a fight where I blacked out. I didn't even know I was angry then, but that's been a while ago. I don't visibly show my anger. I keep it bottled up, which I'm sure is not healthy at all, not with the amount I have. Well, lately my previously mentioned friend and another two friends have been in a bit of a quarrel with each other. Guess who they come to talk about each other? Yep... Me.
I already made it perfectly clear that I want no part in this. Turns out today, friend-mentioned-above decided to put me in it. I've no idea what I've done except for try to be a good friend and listen to whatever they have to say and offer my condolences of the situation. Like I said before: I have very serious anger issues. They've even gotten to the point of thinking about seriously harming someone... Or murder, as bad as it is to say. The person on the top of my list is, again, friend-mentioned-above. But I keep a right mind around people and while in public.
All-in-all, I'm seriously tired of all the bull... And with the stress of drama being placed on me, and that turning into anger, I'm afraid for the person I take my frustrations out on...
I recently moved to a new school this year, and it's been going pretty well despite some few things (see my other thread). A little bit into the year I've noticed that one of my friends is way into drama. She loves it, needless to say. I made a vow to make sure I never got caught up into any drama. Well, thanks to said friend I've been in about 3 or more different drama fights that I didn't need to be in. That I had no part of. That she dragged me into.
I've also had serious anger problems for a while. My mother passed them off as being a normal teenager or wanting attention. After a recent life-changing accident, my mother and aunt decided it would be a good idea to get me a counselor to talk with about my problems. I went for my first visit and have never went back. I've been diagnosed with PTSD, Depression, and Bipolar Disorder. My mother refuses to get me the medication I need, when she's taking enough for the whole neighborhood.
I thought my anger problems have been getting better, but I was wrong... Seriously wrong. Where it used to take me a bit to get angry, now I fly off the handle at any little thing. I've been suspended one time at school because of me getting in a fight where I blacked out. I didn't even know I was angry then, but that's been a while ago. I don't visibly show my anger. I keep it bottled up, which I'm sure is not healthy at all, not with the amount I have. Well, lately my previously mentioned friend and another two friends have been in a bit of a quarrel with each other. Guess who they come to talk about each other? Yep... Me.
I already made it perfectly clear that I want no part in this. Turns out today, friend-mentioned-above decided to put me in it. I've no idea what I've done except for try to be a good friend and listen to whatever they have to say and offer my condolences of the situation. Like I said before: I have very serious anger issues. They've even gotten to the point of thinking about seriously harming someone... Or murder, as bad as it is to say. The person on the top of my list is, again, friend-mentioned-above. But I keep a right mind around people and while in public.
All-in-all, I'm seriously tired of all the bull... And with the stress of drama being placed on me, and that turning into anger, I'm afraid for the person I take my frustrations out on...