My mom

[Twistember]

I know I'm going to sound like a brat, but please just deal with it.

It seems like my mom's whole world revolves around cleaning and household chores. I realize that since my dad left, we each have more responsibility. But I feel like she's putting a lot of pressure on me. I've dealt with this pressure since I was three years old. One day it just all built up and I started self harming.

Every five minutes it's "did you take the trash out?" "did you clean the living room?" "clean the dining room!" "did you take out the trash?" This is all she cares about. I get all A's every grading period so far, and nothing. I forget to take out the trash one day and it's "give me your cell phone and ipod right now. You're so lazy!" I realize that I'm fortunate enough to have a cell phone and an ipod, but no one likes me enough to text me, I guess. I guess I'm just a fucking bitch with a pug nose. (direct quote from a girl at school) I really don't fucking care what she takes away.

I just get so angry and I want to hurt myself. I want to cut myself, starve myself, take a bunch of pills and just die. Anything self destructive, I want to do it. I'm tired of everything revolving around cleaning the house.

I feel like so much pressure has been put on me and I'm about to explode. With all the personal issues I have and all the things people say and think about me at school, it just makes things worse. I try so hard. It's like I can't please her. We have good moments, but it always goes back to something I've done wrong.

She doesn't know about the self-harming. She thinks everything is because of my "anxiety". She's supposed to make me an appointment with a counselor, but she hasn't. And I doubt she will. I'm scared to bring this up with my mom because she's going to blow up about "having no reason to feel this way" I need help. I just feel like I'm never going to be good enough. For anybody.

[neverhavebeen223]

good lord, you just described my mom. I can honestly say i know how you feel. I wouldn't bring it up with your mom, you'd just make things worse by doing that. or on the other hand, she might go the opposite direction and apologize for everything, for making you feel inadequate, but who knows. worse thing my mom ever said to me was "all you're good at is arguing." and "i'm disappointed. really. in you." i play them over in my head when i self-harm. the only person who can help, is yourself. counselors dont do shit. excuse my french

[Megson]

Oh, I know EXACTLY how you feel. You just decribed my life. Sometimes, when I argue with my mom about household chores, I just get so angry. And when I forget to do one chore, she freaks out on me and calls me a lazy child and threatens to abandon us to live in an apartment, because we "wouldn't last a week" without her.

You don't sound like a brat. I think a lot of us feels like you do.

[Toto]

This is kind of like my mother.
My mum`s very strict, and she does fret over household chores. But... I`ve also got a little brother. He`s 10. He sits around playing minecraft all day while I`m washing the dishes, folding the clothes, doing chores. My mum only asks me to do these things, and she doesn`t even care that he doesn`t do anything at all. I`m kind of in a similar situation to yours. But.. I`ve just had to deal with it. Heck, it really annoys me, but I just do it. She is my mother after all.

[Princess Ariel]

Whatever you do, don't bring it up.. Since no one knows what her reaction is going to be, you don't want the worst one when this verbal arguments turn into physical. Avoiding her wouldn't work either, she'd think that you're hiding something.. Just carry on as if it didn't happen.. She is your mother so she has to take care of you, anything you do to yourself, she get's in trouble for.

:hug: PM me if you need anything <33

[TwilightFan]

Sorry, but your mom has problems and you should talk to her about HER problems as well. She sorta reminds me of my own mom, but I get why she acts this way. She has an OCD, so do I and I cut myself for four years now so our situations are quite alike, I guess. It is possible your mom has some sort of an anxiety disorder as well, cause those sort of things are, you know, in blood, so if you have it, you got it from your mom or dad (it's genetic). So that would explain why she reacts like that if you don't clean the bathroom or anything. She gets nervous and she's anxious and she just has to do something. I'm like that too. I start yelling on other people if I get nervous in that anxious way. Well, at least I did. I acknowledge my problems now and I try not to be like this and I got better. It can get better, but your mom won't get better on her own, so you have to say something about it. She has to know how you feel.

You defenetly HAVE to tell her about your problem, too. Belive me, it's going to be much easier after you tell her. I'd tell her when you're both very calm, cause if you're not, she's gonna think you're just angry and you're trying to hurt her. Just bring it up, like: "Mom, I noticed you act weird sometimes. I realize it's though on you, but things aren't very easy for me right now either, so just listen to me. We gotta talk." I didn't tell my parents about my self-harm problem for like three years and all this time I knew I need help, I begged them to get me a counselor, but they just didn't take me seriously until I told them. I have a feeling it's the same with you.

Good luck!

[Wonton]

I'm a guy but you also just described my mom. She's always getting angry at me for stuff like that...I get almost straight A's and annoyingly enough she'll remind me how HARD it is to raise a boy with ADHD, especially when your parents are divorced. Well whoop dee fucking doo. And then she's wondering why she has so much trouble getting back into work, it's because she cleans so fucking much. I'm waiting at the door for her to leave and she's like 'ooh i gotta whipe down the counter ONE MORE TIME and organize everything' and then were late for everything. My days are always like this unless it's school. I'm always half an hour late because she has to keep on cleaning. And I can't even help because she won't let me without even telling me why. she's jutsl ike 'WINSTON' with this dumbass firm voice and I'm like 'Do you want me to help' and she's like 'SIT HERE AND WATCH' like she's done for the past two years. I'm 14 now, I can actually help out around the house believe it or not. Guess what? I can even make my own bed! Holy shit! But nooooooom my mom has too redo everything I do and she won't tell my why and when I protest she just blows up at me. I'm getting so fucking pissed off, next time I'm just going to let her do shit on her own if she doesn't want my help.

Sorry for the huge rage and rant, been needing to get that off my shoulders for some time. 'I feel the same way you do Twistember' is what I'm trying to say. Anyways, if there's a school counseler talk to him/her to arrange an appointment so the three of you can meet. DON'T start cutting now, but if you have, just show your mom and she shouldn't have any trouble believing you. If she thinks that it's for no reason..well...that's just selfish. You shoudl sit down and talk with her with the counseler. and if she doesn't end up booking an appointment at all just keep on reminding her, try to get it done in front of you physically so you know it's been done.