PoisonousLove
June 19th, 2007, 03:41 PM
Hey there...
I found this site just browsing one night, so i decided I might as well seek some advice/help, even though half of you probably dont know what you're talking about, since most of the people are young and naive...
I will not disclose my real name. I am "Jack." I have been cutting for 4 years, I am 16 years old. It began as an act of depression, and became an addiction.
I also have several drug abuse problems. I constantly smoke marijuana, eat mushrooms, ecstacy, acid, snort cocaine, and smoke crack.
I have insomnia, a chemical imbalance, and am schizophrenic. I also have a chemical imbalance, slightly related to bi-polar. I also have "black-moments" in my life. This is not a known-condition, according to the local doctors and phsyciatrists. I constantly have black-outs, where I do not remember a thing. During these periods, under survielance, it was recorded that I harm myself in any which way possible. I have woken up with several knives in my legs, and I have the scars to prove it. Slit wrists, bruised head, arms, chest. Several pill bottles surrounding, etc. I dont know why.
My life has been full of this. I was introduced to drugs at around 6 years old by my parents, who are very abusive. I am also addicted to cigarettes...
Basically, this sounds like a plea for attention. No, it's not. This is just a glance at my life, an introduction and a view to those who decide to help.
What caused all this? Something simple. A girl and a best friend. A girl. And a best friend. The girl I loved. It wasn't infatuation, I can assure you that. It was love. Then, my best friend, the only person whom I ever trusted with anything, took her. Best friend my fucking ass. The first cut was on that night, influenced by alcohol....wow. It started so simply and ended so quickly.
I found this site just browsing one night, so i decided I might as well seek some advice/help, even though half of you probably dont know what you're talking about, since most of the people are young and naive...
I will not disclose my real name. I am "Jack." I have been cutting for 4 years, I am 16 years old. It began as an act of depression, and became an addiction.
I also have several drug abuse problems. I constantly smoke marijuana, eat mushrooms, ecstacy, acid, snort cocaine, and smoke crack.
I have insomnia, a chemical imbalance, and am schizophrenic. I also have a chemical imbalance, slightly related to bi-polar. I also have "black-moments" in my life. This is not a known-condition, according to the local doctors and phsyciatrists. I constantly have black-outs, where I do not remember a thing. During these periods, under survielance, it was recorded that I harm myself in any which way possible. I have woken up with several knives in my legs, and I have the scars to prove it. Slit wrists, bruised head, arms, chest. Several pill bottles surrounding, etc. I dont know why.
My life has been full of this. I was introduced to drugs at around 6 years old by my parents, who are very abusive. I am also addicted to cigarettes...
Basically, this sounds like a plea for attention. No, it's not. This is just a glance at my life, an introduction and a view to those who decide to help.
What caused all this? Something simple. A girl and a best friend. A girl. And a best friend. The girl I loved. It wasn't infatuation, I can assure you that. It was love. Then, my best friend, the only person whom I ever trusted with anything, took her. Best friend my fucking ass. The first cut was on that night, influenced by alcohol....wow. It started so simply and ended so quickly.