Afraid it's going to start again...

[Electra Heart]

So, a few months before I came here to VT, I had quite the mental breakdown. I would cut every night, and, as wimpy as it may sound cry myself to sleep at night. After cutting down my wrist, and nearly killing myself, I stopped, wrapped my razor, and stored it away. Tonight, after having some issues with family, sleep, and depression, I unwrapped my razor, and pondered cutting myself again. This isn't the first time I've done this, but usually I always look down at the long scar down my left wrist, remember, and put it away again. This time, I wasn't so lucky, I simply looked inside myself, and felt that I was hollow. I almost enjoyed feeling myself bleed again. I'm not really sure what this thread is about... advice probably? If you have any, it would certainly be appreciated...

[Jupiter]

Yeah. Listen here, man.

You may have been pleased with the short term feeling of your cutting, but then what? I mean, you are disappointed? Is this true?

[Electra Heart]

Yeah. Listen here, man.

You may have been pleased with the short term feeling of your cutting, but then what? I mean, you are disappointed? Is this true?

Well yeah it's true, I just feel I've lost my grip on reality again. My body says to stop, it's not going to help, but my mind tells me that it's the best thing I can do.

[StoppingTime]

So, a few months before I came here to VT, I had quite the mental breakdown. I would cut every night, and, as wimpy as it may sound cry myself to sleep at night.

That doesn't make you wimpy at all. People just automatically assume you are weak because you cry.
Actually, it's the opposite. It means that you recognize something is wrong, and actually express your feelings instead of keeping it bottled up forever.


After cutting down my wrist, and nearly killing myself, I stopped, wrapped my razor, and stored it away. Tonight, after having some issues with family, sleep, and depression, I unwrapped my razor, and pondered cutting myself again.

Think about it this way. It gives you temporary relief, but then what, you feel guilty about what you did, and wish it never happened.
You end up feeling worse, and it just is never a good way to deal with things, as I'm sure you know.
I don't want to make you feel bad at all because of what happened; I just want you to recognize it.


This isn't the first time I've done this, but usually I always look down at the long scar down my left wrist, remember, and put it away again. This time, I wasn't so lucky, I simply looked inside myself, and felt that I was hollow. I almost enjoyed feeling myself bleed again.

We give into temptations. It's natural human behavior, and you shouldn't worry too much over it.
Of course though, there are better ways to cope.
It's always hard to stop, and there is only one way it'll happen.
You have to want to stop. If you don't want it, as they say, it'll never happen. Nobody is forcing you to stop, only you can do that.
If you don't believe you can, then it will be much harder.
But I know that you can, and you will.

I'm not really sure what this thread is about... advice probably? If you have any, it would certainly be appreciated...[/QUOTE]

That's what we're here for. :)

[CuriousDestruction]

-hugs- it isn't easy. Crying doesn't mean you're weak, it means you've been strong for too long. It's time to let it out. If you start cutting, you'll feel bad that you are, and you'll do it more. vicious cycle. Just remember that you can get through this love. The temptation will always be there but life can be so much better without it. Stay strong love.

[Desuetude]

like everyone else has said, what comes after that very brief moment of relief? Nothing is the answer. Cutting is not good, please don't try an persuade yourself that it is because that will only end up making things worse. Instead of hiding your razor away why not get rid of it? Better to not have it in the house tempting you until you give in. You can do this and you've already proved that you're Strong enough to stop so don't give in yet. We're all here for you anytime you need us.