Complex situation

[babamarta]

Well, it’s about this girl. I’ve known her for about 2 weeks now, I know its short time but it’s just me, I fall in love pretty fast. So, I met her, as I said, 2 weeks ago at the bus stop, actually she started the conversation and we talked and etc. Since she’s from my school, we met a couple of times on the bus stop and on the bus and we talked, we exchanged Skype ID’s, again, she was the one who asked for it. So we are skype texting for about 1 week now. Sometimes she starts the conversation, sometimes I do. So far so good, right? Here’s the bad part. Sometimes when we are texting she replies with one-word-answers or just one emoticon, in a way that makes me think that she is avoiding the conversation, or she doesn’t want to talk to me. And sometimes she disappears in the middle of a conversation, and then comes back 2-3 hours later, when I ask her why does she do that she just says “sorry, I forgot”. But don’t get me wrong, it’s not always like that, sometimes it’s great, yesterday I even got a good-night hug :P But I’m getting mixed signals, how do I know if she is interested in me when she keeps doing stuff like that?
Another thing I missed, the boyfriend, her facebook status says she is in a relationship, but it doesn’t say with whom, there aren’t any photos of her with a boy. there isn’t anyone who is posting kisses or love songs or anything on her wall and she never said anything about boyfriend so I think she doesn’t have one, but still this status bothers me. Should I ask her directly if she has a boyfriend, or subtle, or don’t ask at all?
So my main plan is to ask her out, for a drinks or something, I’ll figure the details afterwards, but do you think asking her out is the right thing to do?

[Kaius]

In all honesty you're better off waiting a little while longer before you rush into anything because theres not really enough clarity to confirm whether she returns the feelings or not and whether or not shes already in a relationship. Its better to find out these things before rushing and it'll also give you more time to get to know each other beforehand.

Just because theres no obvious signs shes in a relationship doesn't mean she's not, for all you know her boyfriend may not have facebook or anything like that which explains why there is none of that. If you want to find out that badly its worth just asking her and see what she says. She may be waiting for you to ask, it may be a bad subject, you won't know until you ask.

[babamarta]

In all honesty you're better off waiting a little while longer before you rush into anything because theres not really enough clarity to confirm whether she returns the feelings or not and whether or not shes already in a relationship. Its better to find out these things before rushing and it'll also give you more time to get to know each other beforehand.

Just because theres no obvious signs shes in a relationship doesn't mean she's not, for all you know her boyfriend may not have facebook or anything like that which explains why there is none of that. If you want to find out that badly its worth just asking her and see what she says. She may be waiting for you to ask, it may be a bad subject, you won't know until you ask.

Ok. I agree about the boyfriend.
But how am I supposed to know whether she is interested in me or not...asking her out seems the most convinient way.

[Desuetude]

Ok. I agree about the boyfriend.
But how am I supposed to know whether she is interested in me or not...asking her out seems the most convinient way.

In my opinion wait a little longer, get to know her better as a friend before you move onto anything bigger. Yeah after you know a little more about her, for example if her has a boyfriend which im pretty sure will come up in conversation sooner or later?, then ask her out but maybe just talk as friends just so you dont make her uncomfortable asking her so soon. Im sure signals will become more clear over time as well.

[babamarta]

In my opinion wait a little longer, get to know her better as a friend before you move onto anything bigger. Yeah after you know a little more about her, for example if her has a boyfriend which im pretty sure will come up in conversation sooner or later?, then ask her out but maybe just talk as friends just so you dont make her uncomfortable asking her so soon. Im sure signals will become more clear over time as well.

The problem is, as I said, the skype chats are not working out very well, and I only see her for 10-20-30mins a day, so I can't get to know her as a friend.

[Kaius]

The problem is, as I said, the skype chats are not working out very well, and I only see her for 10-20-30mins a day, so I can't get to know her as a friend.

Surely if you can't do that theres no way a relationship can form? A relationship can't be fueled on half an hour max a day mate :/

[babamarta]

Surely if you can't do that theres no way a relationship can form? A relationship can't be fueled on half an hour max a day mate :/

That's why I want to ask her out, it doesn't have to be a date or anything, it doesn't mean that something will happen, I just want to know her a bit better, that's my idea.

[babamarta]

She has a boyfriend. I didn't ask her, I found out... it's just.... I can't express my frustration enough.

[Desuetude]

Awh well im sorry to hear that but really there isn't much you can do other than move on. If you want to stay friends keep skyping or texting her but dont presurise her into changing her mind and choosing you or anything.

[babamarta]

I know I have no choice but to move on, but I really liked her, and she was the only girl that I like that actually showed some signals of liking me back, or at least I thought so.