Scared of relapsing...

[StrawberryCyanide]

Hi all, it's been a while since I've needed you!

So here's what's going on, I've been "recovered" from my ED's for a while, but I noticed that through recovery I put on a little extra weight. I know this is normal and I was expecting it.
Over the past couple of months I've been eating healthy and exercising just to get generally fitter, but I've noticed that not only am I eating healthy I'm eating less and less every day, exercising more and more and starting to worry about my size again.

I recently saw my boyfriend and found myself feeling incredibly anxious and unattractive and not wanting him to see or touch my body at all. I haven't felt uncomfortable with him like that for about a year.

I get the urge to purge after I eat anything to the point where I feel like I'm going to be sick without having to make myself sick.

I don't really know what to do, I feel like it's all creeping back :( Has anyone got any advice, or is going through something similar? Need a virtual hug!

Thank you guys <3

[Mortal Coil]

At least you're conscious of what's happening, that's a huge thing which is important to your recovery.
It would really help if you set daily calorie quotas or max hours of exercise, even though it's not great to make these 100% rigid, they should be unmovable guidelines where you aim within a fairly small margin.
:hug:

[Madnessandmania]

Aw darlin', I'm sorry you're going through this :/ I'm kind of stuck in the dilemma as well at the moment. Maybe talk to a professional and get some support?