Helppp what should I do?!?!

[ashdyn]

I've been dating my girlfriend for a year now but I think I did something really bad. Her ex (they dated for 2 years) recently tried to get back into contact with her. She seemed somewhat interested but idk really, anyway long story short I saw a text from him asking my gf to hook up with him. Not to get back together or anything just physical. So I deleted it off her phone and texted him myself.

We're not allowed to do stories on here so I'll just say I ended up giving him a blowjob. I'm not sexually confused or anything, I experimented when I was younger but I'm straight. I love my girlfriend and don't have any feelings for her ex. Just being honest with myself though I enjoyed it, I got a rush I've never gotten before.

HELPPPPP what do I do????

[monkeydo]

Wow, that's an awkward situation to be in. I definitely think its unfair to your girlfriend and if you want to do anything more with him then you should probably break it off with her first to be fair. But if you have feelings for her and not for him, then is it really worth it? Especially since you don't think you're gay, anything that happens with him probably won't have a real future and you'll just hurt her for a casual fling with him. But also, like I've said in other posts before, I don't really believe in the straight/gay/bi labels myself, even though I say I'm gay... I prefer to just think that I'm "sexual". And I'm not proud of it, but I've done stuff with guys while they've had girlfriends and it was the same for them I think.... I never had "relationships" with them, and I knew I could never replace their girlfriends, but it was just exciting for both of us, like the rush you mentioned. So in those cases I was never competing with their girlfriends and nobody ever found out, and to be honest we really, really enjoyed ourselves. BUT I also don't think it was fair on their girlfriends and I know it was wrong. On a moral level I know it was wrong, but on a sexual level it was amazing. So I think your challenge is to figure out which is more important to you: morals or sex. Good luck, because I still haven't figured that out myself. I always seem to end up thinking with the wrong head.

[ashdyn]

Thanks for actually replying! I know it was wrong and I think I'm going to tell her. I think after that breaking off whatever there is with him will come naturally or whatever. He's not gay. I'm not gay. It's just so confusing.

[monkeydo]

Hey no worries. Hope it helped somehow. I think that would be the right thing to do, although it probably won't be easy... honesty with her is the best. I totally understand where you are and how confusing it is.... I just hope she does too! Good luck. Let me know what happens?