Sterling26
February 15th, 2012, 10:48 PM
Now let me start off by saying this. I don't get depressed. Like ever. When I get sad or upset, the only thing I think is "How can I fix this and get things back to normal ASAP?" But right now I don't feel sad, I just don't feel happy. And there's nothing that I can do about it. I think there's just been a string of things the past couple weeks and I haven't had a win in a while:
-I'm bi, and I came out to a gay guy from my high school that I like, and about a week later he outed me in front of a bunch of people, including my favorite teacher from high school, who apparently helped out me.
-Upset about the above, I came out to my friend who's a girl and a senior from my HS, and she was really supportive and told me she'll try to help fix things. That was a week ago. I haven't heard from her, and on Facebook I'm fairly sure she's set it so I see her as being offline so I can't talk to her. I think she took the side of the above douche bag, who she's apparently friends with.
-My best friend lives 4 hours away, barely goes on FB, and I rarely have the chance to talk to him.
-The above three people are the only ones back home that know I'm bi.
- I think I might be gay.
- My dad is a big homophobe, though he has a big double standard; lesbians are hot, bi girls are normal, and gay/bi guys are 'disturbing'.
-I have no relationship with my father, and it's because every time I fix things with him he always screws it up again and treats me like shit, so I'm done being hurt.
- My friends from HS consider me an outsider in the group, and only a handful actually like me. Seriously, one of them liked something I posted on FB, rethought it, and unliked it.
- I feel like my college friends are starting to go the same way, giving me the cold shoulder, and I'm really trying to be nice and not start conflict, but I don't understand what I've done to deserve all of this shit.
-I have no one to room with for next semester, and I'm probably going to wind up being by myself again.
-The girl I like here at my school has a boyfriend of almost 6 months, and I have to go on pretending I'm okay with just being friends.
-There are no guys here that I know that are appealing to me, I feel alone and unloved.
-It's been almost 6 months since I've seen my kids (campers) and I miss them so much. I won't be seeing them for over another 4 months, and time is going by so slowly.
Worst of all, I really feel helpless right now, like I can do nothing to fix this. I'm not crying as I write this, but I'm not smiling. I'm not anything. And I don't need a response from anyone telling me this will get better, I just wanted to get it out. I'm depressed.
-I'm bi, and I came out to a gay guy from my high school that I like, and about a week later he outed me in front of a bunch of people, including my favorite teacher from high school, who apparently helped out me.
-Upset about the above, I came out to my friend who's a girl and a senior from my HS, and she was really supportive and told me she'll try to help fix things. That was a week ago. I haven't heard from her, and on Facebook I'm fairly sure she's set it so I see her as being offline so I can't talk to her. I think she took the side of the above douche bag, who she's apparently friends with.
-My best friend lives 4 hours away, barely goes on FB, and I rarely have the chance to talk to him.
-The above three people are the only ones back home that know I'm bi.
- I think I might be gay.
- My dad is a big homophobe, though he has a big double standard; lesbians are hot, bi girls are normal, and gay/bi guys are 'disturbing'.
-I have no relationship with my father, and it's because every time I fix things with him he always screws it up again and treats me like shit, so I'm done being hurt.
- My friends from HS consider me an outsider in the group, and only a handful actually like me. Seriously, one of them liked something I posted on FB, rethought it, and unliked it.
- I feel like my college friends are starting to go the same way, giving me the cold shoulder, and I'm really trying to be nice and not start conflict, but I don't understand what I've done to deserve all of this shit.
-I have no one to room with for next semester, and I'm probably going to wind up being by myself again.
-The girl I like here at my school has a boyfriend of almost 6 months, and I have to go on pretending I'm okay with just being friends.
-There are no guys here that I know that are appealing to me, I feel alone and unloved.
-It's been almost 6 months since I've seen my kids (campers) and I miss them so much. I won't be seeing them for over another 4 months, and time is going by so slowly.
Worst of all, I really feel helpless right now, like I can do nothing to fix this. I'm not crying as I write this, but I'm not smiling. I'm not anything. And I don't need a response from anyone telling me this will get better, I just wanted to get it out. I'm depressed.