New to this forum...i need advice :3

[Isabellalovesyou.]

I've been cutting for about a year and a half and this summer I didnt cut much, so I felt as if it was time to talk to my stepmom about it. I thought she would understand because when she used to sh and finally recovered. But she asked a couple questions and it hadn't been brought up since then. But when school started back up I was at a new school and tge stress and lonliness set it and cutting got bad again and has been ever since. The scars on my wrist are dark, but I think the bracelets are keeping them from my parents. But in dance the other day I wasnt allowed to have my braclets on and my bestfriend asked what was on my wrists. I just laughed it off and said duh scars you know I used to cut, but she kept saying she knew they were new but just shutup after I kept saying they werent. So I guess I'm just wondering....should I try talking to my parents again? Should I keep talking to my new boyfriend who also used to sh? Has anyone had good experiences with school counselers? And...should I talk to my friend about this? Or just keep quiet so she didn't get mad about me lying? Tell me your stories and opinions. Make me feel welcome since I'm new? Much love. Thanks. <3

[Desuetude]

Hey welcome to vt! :-)
It sounds to me that lots of people are willing to help you, if this is the case don't back away, let them.
Your step mum knows how you're feeling and what you are going through if she used to sh, maybe she just wanted to understand why you were, just trying to understand you and what you are feeling and that's why questions were asked.
If your friend is asking about them then maybe she just wants to check up on you and make sure you arnt hurting yourself again, that's what a real friend would do. I mean if you thought your friend was purposely hurting herself wouldn't you want to help her?
With talking to people I think that they all seem like they want to help.you. Talk to the people you trust the most maybe your step mum or boyfriend as they would know how your feeling and would not judge so easily. Like I said your friend seems like she is bothering you because she wants to know so if you are close then maybe talk to her. Don't keep it in, if you are confident that you have someone to depend on ans trust then tell them, get it out, make sure someone is there that can listen when you need to be heard.
We are always here for you to tell if you feel like you cant talk to the people around you but I encourage you to tell someone you know. It will be a big burden off your shoulders if you do.
Hope everything goes well and believe in yourself, you are brave enough to stop, you don't need to self harm it just makes things worse.

[Isabellalovesyou.]

It's almost like I done want their help, like,i don't want to stop. :/
&wow..29 views and 1 reply? Shows how many people on here, actually care.

[Mutibann]

It's almost like I done want their help, like,i don't want to stop. :/
&wow..29 views and 1 reply? Shows how many people on here, actually care.

a lot of the people on here care, we just don't always know what to say.

[xXl0sth0peXx]

It's almost like I done want their help, like,i don't want to stop. :/
&wow..29 views and 1 reply? Shows how many peple on here, actually care.

Actually, at least 75% of the views are most likely visitors ( as in non-members) viewing the thread, meaning they can't reply. Everyone cares, hence why they read your thread. If you look at a lot of the other threads out there, there are humdreds of views and a few replies. It's normal.

Now a real reply to your post..

I honestly would tell them. You're one of the few 'lucky' people with a parent who really understands. And she already knows. I would tell your boyfriend. Telling him not only shows love, but trust. (Better you tell him than him find out, yes?) And if he can't accept you like that, he's not for you. Maybe he'll even be able to help you stop. Especially because he knows first hand, since he used to. As for school consulors, I don't personally know, it's really up to you and how badly you need/want help. I think if you tell your parent(s)/BF, you don't need to tell him/her unless you want to. And for your friend, I again say tell her. Obviously she cares or she wouldn't have brought it up. It seems like she genuinely cares, and even though you lied to her, I think she knows the truth, and would like to hear it from you.

Good luck, stay strong, and feel free to PM me if you ever need anything :)

[anonymous53]

should I try talking to my parents again? Should I keep talking to my new boyfriend who also used to sh? Has anyone had good experiences with school counselers? And...should I talk to my friend about this? Or just keep quiet so she didn't get mad about me lying? Tell me your stories and opinions. Make me feel welcome since I'm new? Much love. Thanks. <3

Talking to your parents, yes you should. This way you can possibly get help, you're lucky to have parents that do care.

Of course talk to your boyfriend, your friends and family are a great support system. :)

My only experience was once with a school counselor, the first time I had attempted suicide I actually came into school, my friend noticed something was wrong and forced me to go into the counselor, who had me explain what had happened. I can't classify it as a good or bad experience, I ended up in the hospital for about 3 months after that.

Yes, talk to your friend about it, she knew you were lying but probably didn't want to press the issue if you weren't ready to talk about it.



As to the views and replies, Val covered that. We do care.

[Love.Hate]

Theres not much else i can say, i think everyone has summed it up really, i think you should talk to your parents too. My experience with school councellors has been very positive, she was the only councellor i actually got on with (had many psychologists that doctors reffered me too etc..) and i liked her and she did help me through some eating problems and ways to keep myself less stressed. However if you tell them that your going to do something silly they have to notify your parents, for safeguarding etc. I'd give it a go if i were you! You have nothing to lose, they are there for when you need help and if you feel you need it use them.

Everyone on here cares, thats why we are here. Feel free to VM me if you need anything and welcome to VT! :)

[Desuetude]

It's almost like I done want their help, like,i don't want to stop. :/
&wow..29 views and 1 reply? Shows how many people on here, actually care.

Hey I know what it's like not wanting to stop just yet. I know it feels good for the moment but just think what would happen if you got to addicted, how much worse things could get for you. Maybe it's best to stop now but if you really feel you can't just yet then there is still no harm in telling someone you trust. You never know but they could help you with the self harming as well.
I urge you to at least try and tell one of them, like I said the boyfriend seems likr a good option as it's harder telling parents. Just don't walk round with NO ONE knowing anything about how you're feeling. The longer you keep it in the harder it will be to tell them.

Like Val said people on here do care an awful lot but it's not just us that read the posts. If people have some way to help you then more often than not they comment. You wouldn't want people saying a load of things that wouldn't help at all. <3

[thegreenone]

My personal experience is that therapy has been the biggest help for me. Its an easy, non-judgemental enviornment where you're able to let things out that maybe you've kept inside from everybody. It's also through therapy that I was referred to a doctor and subsequently diagnosed with Depression. I've been able to get medications that help regulate me better, so I don't feel like shit all the time. Your situation will, of course, be different than mine. But on the whole, this has been what has helped me the most.

[Mortal Coil]

There really isn't much for me to add anymore, except that if you don't want to stop, nobody's going to try to force you. Psychiatrists agree you have to want to change. Your friend already knows you lied to her so that wouldn't be a big deal. I would recommend you tell your boyfriend. You hqve no idea how lucky you are to have friends and a boyfriend.
Also, welcome to VT :)