blades in hand. HELP

[acryforhelp]

I so desperately want to cut. I have my blades in hand. But something is stopping me.....I am fighting it though and I cant seem to make up my mind. HELP

[Desuetude]

DON'T, thats the answer. If your deciding between cutting or not and cant choose then not to is the best answer.
Just put down the blades, hide them somewhere that hard to get to maybe. Go and do something else to take your mind off it walk, take photos, draw, watch tv, play on a console, read. there are so many other things you could do that dont involve harming yourself.
Its so good that your fighting against it, just be brave and dont give in to temptation. You are stronger than to let a blade have the upper hand on you.

[acryforhelp]

I cant stop shaking. the urges are so strong.

[Desuetude]

Im sorry for the late reply, i do hope you havent cut.
You honestly need to try and fight it, nothing will come of giving in and cutting.
Just do things to take your mind off it like I said, write a poem or a long letter or just a load of mumbo jumbo about what you are feeling if it helps, just write whatever comes to you, think of every reason why you started cutting in the first place, don't miss anything out and when you are finished read it though again and then tear it up. Take out all your anger on the paper, every reason why you wanted to cut was on there and you just tore them apart, dont take out things on yourself its so much better to find something else that would work as well.

[acryforhelp]

In the end I ended up cutting. Havent decided if it was worth it or not. Its been a rough day and the cutting came as a relief but the hiding and the lies just adds to it all.

[Christheman]

Listen to me... stop scaring you're skin. They will always be there. There are other ways to get relief such as masturbation or watching a funny show!

[acryforhelp]

And you think masturbation is any more okay than cutting????? You must not have a clue.

[Desuetude]

In the end I ended up cutting. Havent decided if it was worth it or not. Its been a rough day and the cutting came as a relief but the hiding and the lies just adds to it all.

Oh no, im so sorry.
Is it worth the hiding and lies though?
The relief from cutting is only for a short while but all the extra baggage that comes with it. Sometime just try and add up all the good and the bad points about cutting. Im sure you'd see that the bad outways the good by a long shot.

[acryforhelp]

Once again I am back in that position again. I lied to my counselor yesterday and told her I hadnt cut....when really I had. I did tell her I had blades in my possesion though. She recommended getting rid of them.....not gonna happen sorry to say. So yes.....I am back to that point of the blades in my hand and wanting to cut. But I am shaking and sick to my stomache because with each cut means less self control and I keep going deeper and deeper. This is getting to the point where its scary.

[Desuetude]

You shouldnt have lied to your councelor, i know it might not feel like it but shes there to help you but if youre not telling her about things how's she going to know you need help?
If its getting to the point where youre losing self control you should really try and push yourself to stop. Going deeper isnt going to help things, its going to make it worse, you have a higher chance of getting infected, you have to look after them more carefully, they take a lot longer to scar over. Is it worth all the hassle and trouble, really? just take some time to think about it i know ive said it many times but i think you need to try and find an alternative to cutting that would benefit you more.
There is only so much other people can do to help and then it's left to you. It's your choice if you want to help yourself and no one elses so if you are serious about stopping you are going to have to do things like throw away your blades, i know it will be difficult but you arn't going to be able to stop otherwise, like you said, less self control. so its going to get harder the longer you leave it.
I believe you can do it and im sure many people do, but it's not about us. Its about you and if you are strong enough to change this one thing that could make your life a whole lot better.