I.love.her!

[Aksed]

Hello. I'm here to share my story about this girl i'm in love with with you and hopefully get some ideas what to do.

Anyway I know for half an year now, we've been friends and I was always in love with her. And there is a reason for that, she is perfect. I mean... PERFECT! There is not a single flaw in her that I can think of. Now to the problem. She doesn't like me, at least not for something more than a friend. She didn't openly reject me, but I'm not stupid, I get it from her attitude. And I understand her, but I can't help myself. I think about her all the time, I dream about her all the time, i just can't get her out of my head. When I see her, it makes me happy, really happy, when I'm with her i forget all the shitty things in my life, and there are a lot of them, I'm just happy to be around her, even only as a friend. We are in the same school (though she is 1 year older than me), so we go to school together, and sometimes she's the only reason that I go there, I mean sometimes I don't feel well and in normal circumstances, I wouldn't go, but I do, just to see her, even if it's for 20 minutes or so. And I can't tell her how I feel because if I do it would ruin our friendship, I'll start to see her more rarely, and I don't want that to happen, although I'm pretty sure she knows how I feel, i've shown it many times. So my question is, how, how can I stop thinking about her, how do I accept her as just friend when inside I'm dying to show my love for her?
Oh and other thing, we use Skype to chat, and there is one thing I notice - she never starts a conversation. It's always me, but I know I'm not annoying her because when i start the conversation we can chat for hours! It's just that she's never the one who starts the conversation, and that bothers me.

Oh well I think that's it.
I'm not a native English speaker, so i hope you'll understand me, and excuse me for my bad English.

[Heatbomb21]

I am on EXACTLY the same boat.


Seriously, almost everything you said about this girl you speak of is the same with me. However, I would try to maintain the friendship that you have. 6 months doesn't seem like a long enough time to profess your love for someone. The one I love I've known for 3 years. That'w how I'm certain that she's the great person she is.

Plus, I thought a ton about everything about her for DAYS. I suggest you do a lot more thinking yourself. I hope I'm not offending you in anyway.

[bobtom]

As to the thing with you starting the conversation, and her never doing so herself:

Say something that could end the conversation, like "Yep" and only that. If she continues the conversation that might mean she still wants to talk to you, that is if you are worried about that.

About accepting her as a friend:

Personally, I wouldn't accept it. I would persue her until she either said yes or said no. I like definite things, however, so its a qustion for you.

About your English:

Your english is better than most American Teen's, you have nothing to worry about on that front...

Regards,

-Craig

[Aksed]

I am on EXACTLY the same boat.


Seriously, almost everything you said about this girl you speak of is the same with me. However, I would try to maintain the friendship that you have. 6 months doesn't seem like a long enough time to profess your love for someone. The one I love I've known for 3 years. That'w how I'm certain that she's the great person she is.

Plus, I thought a ton about everything about her for DAYS. I suggest you do a lot more thinking yourself. I hope I'm not offending you in anyway.

Don't worry, you're not offending me :)
But I don't think I can take it much longer, the constant thoughts about her are driving me crazy, I have to do something.

As to the thing with you starting the conversation, and her never doing so herself:

Say something that could end the conversation, like "Yep" and only that. If she continues the conversation that might mean she still wants to talk to you, that is if you are worried about that.


I'll try that, thanks.


About accepting her as a friend:

Personally, I wouldn't accept it. I would persue her until she either said yes or said no. I like definite things, however, so its a qustion for you.

About your English:

Your english is better than most American Teen's, you have nothing to worry about on that front...

Regards,

-Craig

I asked a friend of mine for advice, he told me that I should tell her how i feel, no hints, no sings, just talking and confessing my feelings. While it may seem a little direct I think he's right, but I have a HUGE fear of rejection, I really don't know if it's such a good idea :(

Anyways, thanks for the answers guys, it helps me more than you think:)

[Heatbomb21]

Yeah. I know how you feel. I almost went insane because I felt I needed to tell someone. Then I remembered this forum...

You're quite welcome.

Also, if you want to tell her straight, try being semi-subtle with it. if you go all out saying "__________ I will love you now and forever!", she's gonna be pretty taken aback.

[Aksed]

Yeah. I know how you feel. I almost went insane because I felt I needed to tell someone. Then I remembered this forum...

You're quite welcome.

Also, if you want to tell her straight, try being semi-subtle with it. if you go all out saying "__________ I will love you now and forever!", she's gonna be pretty taken aback.

Of course :D I'll tell her that I feel her as more than a friend and I have feelings for her :) I have it all mapped out. I just don't know how I will react if/when she rejects me, first because it will hurt my feelings, and second because i'll see her every day and it'll be kidna weird..
Again, thanks for the responds, I really appreciate it :)

[Heatbomb21]

I wish you the best.

You're welcome.

[Aksed]

Thanks man :) I hope the things between you and your girl work out too :P

I'm still open for advices :)

[Heatbomb21]

Thanks man :) I hope the things between you and your girl work out too :P


Much appreciated. I'll need all the hope, wishes, magical chicken feathers, and luck in the world for things to work out with us. But thanks all the same. :)

[Aksed]

Much appreciated. I'll need all the hope, wishes, magical chicken feathers, and luck in the world for things to work out with us. But thanks all the same. :)

Me too :( We hope for the best :)

[Heatbomb21]

I'll toast to that.

[Aksed]

I'll toast to that.

Fuck yeah. All I am waiting now is for a second opinion and i'm doing it, i'll share what happens if anyone care :)

[Heatbomb21]

Good. Glad you're confident. Now if only I could do that... :P

[Aksed]

Well I haven't seen her in 3 days ... i hope my confidence won't fade away when I do :P

[Heatbomb21]

Nah. I'm sure you'll do fine. Even if things don't work out the way you expect, you can always maintain a friendship. And if she refuses that, then she's S.O.L.

[Aksed]

Nah. I'm sure you'll do fine. Even if things don't work out the way you expect, you can always maintain a friendship. And if she refuses that, then she's S.O.L.

I have no idea what S.O.L means, but i'm sure she not :D

[Heatbomb21]

"Shit Outta Luck".

But again, you'll do fine. :D

[Aksed]

"Shit Outta Luck".

But again, you'll do fine. :D

If she refuses - i'm S.O.L :D

[Heatbomb21]

Rejection may feel like a needle to the nut, but I think you'll recover fast if that becomes the case. But if nothing else, she should definitely try to remain friends. Again, if she doesn't, she's S.O.L.

If she refuses, then you know you had nothing to lose. (I know it sounds bad and I don't mean to talk down on anybody, but if she knows you like her, you were friends before you told her, and she refuses to stay friends, then I don't think she's a great choice
. Despite her perfection.)

[Aksed]

Rejection may feel like a needle to the nut, but I think you'll recover fast if that becomes the case. But if nothing else, she should definitely try to remain friends. Again, if she doesn't, she's S.O.L.

If she refuses, then you know you had nothing to lose. (I know it sounds bad and I don't mean to talk down on anybody, but if she knows you like her, you were friends before you told her, and she refuses to stay friends, then I don't think she's a great choice
. Despite her perfection.)

I'm not 100% sure about that though..
Anyway we'll see what happens, I still hope for the best :)

[Heatbomb21]

I know. I'm saying. After you tell her.

May only the best follow you.

[Aksed]

I know. I'm saying. After you tell her.

May only the best follow you.

I don't know what will hurt me more, the rejection itself, or the fact that we can't be friends. But on the other hand she is a reasonable girl, so it's unlikely to happen, I hope..

[Heatbomb21]

There's something I can't respond to without a repeat.

It's a bridge you'll have to cross when you get to it. But remember, it could be neither.

I'm sure that if she's reasonable she'll give you a truthful response.

[Aksed]

Fuck I can't do it :(
When she smiles at me, I lose control of myself, all my enthusiasm, confidence and self-esteem evaporates. I can't even explain it...

[Heatbomb21]

It's fine. Chill for a moment.

This may take some time, but if you had the confidence before, you can get it again.

However, if you feel it's taking too long, then be really subtle with it. Do small things. The girl I like, I haven't told her how I feel, because I'm on the same boat. But I give her small signals sometimes.

We have this thing going where whenever we come across a door, I'd hold it for her. It's quite hilarious.

I also sometimes stare at her during play practice and she just catches me by a hair, or we try to talk to each other from a distance with hand signals.

Try to make her laugh. If she knows you're trying to make her laugh, she'll like you for that. Nobody hates laughter.

[Aksed]

It's fine. Chill for a moment.

This may take some time, but if you had the confidence before, you can get it again.

However, if you feel it's taking too long, then be really subtle with it. Do small things. The girl I like, I haven't told her how I feel, because I'm on the same boat. But I give her small signals sometimes.

We have this thing going where whenever we come across a door, I'd hold it for her. It's quite hilarious.

I also sometimes stare at her during play practice and she just catches me by a hair, or we try to talk to each other from a distance with hand signals.

Try to make her laugh. If she knows you're trying to make her laugh, she'll like you for that. Nobody hates laughter.

No, I can't play the friend game anymore, it's driving me crazy. I have to find a way to tell her :( What do you think about SMS or Skype :(
// we chat every night on skype b

[Heatbomb21]

Absoultely NOT SMS. That's the equal reaction to breaking up over text message. Totally insensitive and it makes things deathly awkward.

Skype is semi-better. At least you're talking face to face, but there's still not that necessary connection for a totally apropriate response from either of you. Unless you won't see her for a long long time, I wouldn't reccommend it.

And hey, I don't want to or can't stand the friend game as much as you do, but if it's for someone you love, then so be it.

[Aksed]

Absoultely NOT SMS. That's the equal reaction to breaking up over text message. Totally insensitive and it makes things deathly awkward.

Skype is semi-better. At least you're talking face to face, but there's still not that necessary connection for a totally apropriate response from either of you. Unless you won't see her for a long long time, I wouldn't reccommend it.

Yeah, I guess you're right, if I can't find my balls to tell her in person, my last resort will be Skype.

And hey, I don't want to or can't stand the friend game as much as you do, but if it's for someone you love, then so be it.

I can't keep doing this to myself. But I don't have to explain this to you, i'm sure you know what it's like, seeing your dream girl every fucking day, but you know you can't hug her, kiss her, or give her the attention she deserves, you can't give her half of the things you're actually capable of.
I guess there's still hope in me, that if I tell her, things might actually work out between us. That's the part of me that wants to end the "friend game".

[Heatbomb21]

Yeah, I guess you're right, if I can't find my balls to tell her in person, my last resort will be Skype.


I can't keep doing this to myself. But I don't have to explain this to you, i'm sure you know what it's like, seeing your dream girl every fucking day, but you know you can't hug her, kiss her, or give her the attention she deserves, you can't give her half of the things you're actually capable of.
I guess there's still hope in me, that if I tell her, things might actually work out between us. That's the part of me that wants to end the "friend game".

Yeah, it's brutal as Hell...it's like seeing the most exotic bird on the planet and not being able to have it as your own...but if you reach out to the bird, make it comfortable with you over time, it will stay with you.

I really never got to know my loved one as much as I'd liked within the past few years, and it's the biggest mistake I've ever made. That's try I'm trying to make up for it. By giving her the attention she deserves. Despite the fact that I'm not the best to give it to her.

[crustbag]

keep talking to her and always be nice and also your english is better than most peoples on this site :)

[Jordan1234]

Dude you are in PERFECT situation... I love my ex very much like no one else but she don't give a single fuck about me.. I mean seriously.. I would be happy if I even see her for 10 min

[Aksed]

keep talking to her and always be nice and also your english is better than most peoples on this site :)

I am always nice to her, ALWAYS.

Dude you are in PERFECT situation... I love my ex very much like no one else but she don't give a single fuck about me.. I mean seriously.. I would be happy if I even see her for 10 min

Really? How the fuck am I in perfect situation. It didn't work out between you too I guess, but you at least had a chance with her, that's all what i'm asking for, a chance.

but if you reach out to the bird, make it comfortable with you over time, it will stay with you.

I want to beleive that, I really do, but it's just not working for me at the moment, at least not in the way I want to.

[Heatbomb21]

Is there anything blocking you besides fear? Pressure? Jerks? Anything?


If you're not, then at least look for a proper moment. Some time where she wouldn't be affected as much as she would any other time.

If "Valentine's Day" immediately popped into your head after reading that, think again.

[Aksed]

Is there anything blocking you besides fear? Pressure? Jerks? Anything?


If you're not, then at least look for a proper moment. Some time where she wouldn't be affected as much as she would any other time.

If "Valentine's Day" immediately popped into your head after reading that, think again.
No, fear is my only enemy now. And yes, the first thing that came to my mind was Valentine's Day :lol:

[Heatbomb21]

And yes, the first thing that came to my mind was Valentine's Day :lol:


No.

Valentine's Day isa strongly commercialized holiday, which many douches in the world use just to get a date or use people. Also, people think that Valentine's Day is the absolute best time to tell someone you like/love them, when really, any time would be sufficient. Don't submit yourself to it. It'd be saying that you are limited to speak your feeling to a set day, and I strongly doubt anyone would like that.

[Aksed]

No.

Valentine's Day isa strongly commercialized holiday, which many douches in the world use just to get a date or use people. Also, people think that Valentine's Day is the absolute best time to tell someone you like/love them, when really, any time would be sufficient. Don't submit yourself to it. It'd be saying that you are limited to speak your feeling to a set day, and I strongly doubt anyone would like that.

So what would be the right time to hell her? What do you mean by "proper moment"?

[Heatbomb21]

Well, it depends...

It could be just any old day, a day important to her, important to you, it could be a bad day for her or you...

Any time would be sufficient, as I said. As long as she's affected differently as she would some other time. Yet another good reason to remain subtle. To find out when to tell her.

That's what I mean by "proper moment".

[Aksed]

Well, it depends...

It could be just any old day, a day important to her, important to you, it could be a bad day for her or you...

Any time would be sufficient, as I said. As long as she's affected differently as she would some other time. Yet another good reason to remain subtle. To find out when to tell her.

That's what I mean by "proper moment".

I see what you mean ... I just can't think of such proper moment.

[Heatbomb21]

Or perhaps when the two of you have a moment of privacy. There's an open oppurtunity.

[Aksed]

Yeah, well thank you HeatBomb21 and everyone else who replied, for helping me with this, and giving me advices, it's been really helpful, I don't think much more can be said, now it's up to me, and her.
I will tell her how I feel pretty soon, and I'll share it here if anybody cares anyway :)
Again, thank you!

[Heatbomb21]

No problem. Happy to help. Please do tell us how it went.

If you have any more problems, plese do not hesitate to ask me or anyone else here on VT.

Best of luck to you! :)

[Heatbomb21]

Please do let us know how it went. Any more issues don't hesitate to ask anyone else here at VT.

Best of luck to you!

[Aksed]

Please do let us know how it went. Any more issues don't hesitate to ask anyone else here at VT.

Best of luck to you!

Ok I will then. But I don't want to get your hopes up, it might not happen in the next couple of days, maybe a week or so, but I'll post it.

[Heatbomb21]

Righto. (Sorry for duplicate)

[Aksed]

Righto. (Sorry for duplicate)

Funny thing I just noticed, you have more posts in my thread than I do :D

[Christheman]

I was in "love" with a girl back in franker school and i told her and told her but i just gave up i guess you might as well try

[Aksed]

I was in "love" with a girl back in franker school and i told her and told her but i just gave up i guess you might as well try

:what: I swear to God, I have no idea what I just read.. :what: