TheHumanSpirit
January 18th, 2012, 08:25 PM
Wow, this just never seems to stop. -_-
We had a 3-day holiday weekend so I txted my only guy bestfriend once on the first day, and again on the second because I saw him on Facebook so I figured he would answer txts... Nope. Ignored. My friend sent him a txt and he responded asking who it was.
Yesterday was our first day back to school. I was sitting in our first class doing some work when "Joe" came in. I was kinda po'd about him not responding even though he was clearly doing other stuff that, in my opinion, really shouldn't have taken more of a priority (it's not that I'm possessive of my friends, I just really like talking to my home boy). He came in, didn't even say hi, and sat in desks next to me to talk to other people.
At our "yearbook meeting," "Joe" told me how wrong I was for making a decision that affected our entire staff group, even after I considered everyone's opinion. He was constantly criticizing the way I lead the yearbook and later expressed that he felt I was trying to force my authority upon others just for the sake of doing so. I tried to tell him that wasn't the case, but he didn't want to believe me. He also talked about how my txting was distracting because he wanted to spend his time either on homework or with family. I understood those two things were more important, so I suggested that he txt me instead from now on; he agreed. I told him that I was just afraid he wouldn't txt me, and he said he probably wouldn't since he doesn't txt any of his friends unless it's about a homework assignment.
I suggested that we hang out instead, just the two of us guys. He said that was weird to him because he doesn't like hanging out with only one person. He said that we see and talk to each other enough at school, and if I wanted to hang out, then I should invite a lot of people and have a party, in which case he'd come. My problem is this: when we hang out or talk to each other at school, we're constantly surrounded by other people; there's really no opportunity for personal interaction. We can't bag on teachers just for kicks, or talk about the stuff we normally would talk about one-on-one when we're around other people all the time. I told him I feel like he makes no effort, and he just said that he really doesn't make effort with any of his friends.
I mentioned that I would be graduating soon and I was afraid I wouldn't see my junior best friends anymore (which would include "Joe"). He said that's what happens when seniors graduate and that he obviously can't visit me after, but I could come visit all of them at school once in a while, and maybe txt him occasionally after I graduate.
I feel like I should drop kick this effortless friend straight out of my life, but then I remember just how much fun we have when we're actually just one-on-one, and he's my only male best friend. During my sophomore year and the start of my junior year, I was sort of the same way; I'd be satisfied with just family and homework and wouldn't feel the need to socialize outside of that world. I would also criticize others for everything I saw them doing wrong and be incapable of accepting responsibility when in direct communication with others, but then when I was alone, I would think about everything I should've done differently and how much of a f*** up I was, and that I had to improve. So I feel like if this is the same situation with him, then he might need me as a friend. I can empathize, but I'm faced with the question: is this good enough for me? Should I put so much of my own energy into someone who might be completely unmoved if one day I suddenly dropped out of his life for good? Help!!
We had a 3-day holiday weekend so I txted my only guy bestfriend once on the first day, and again on the second because I saw him on Facebook so I figured he would answer txts... Nope. Ignored. My friend sent him a txt and he responded asking who it was.
Yesterday was our first day back to school. I was sitting in our first class doing some work when "Joe" came in. I was kinda po'd about him not responding even though he was clearly doing other stuff that, in my opinion, really shouldn't have taken more of a priority (it's not that I'm possessive of my friends, I just really like talking to my home boy). He came in, didn't even say hi, and sat in desks next to me to talk to other people.
At our "yearbook meeting," "Joe" told me how wrong I was for making a decision that affected our entire staff group, even after I considered everyone's opinion. He was constantly criticizing the way I lead the yearbook and later expressed that he felt I was trying to force my authority upon others just for the sake of doing so. I tried to tell him that wasn't the case, but he didn't want to believe me. He also talked about how my txting was distracting because he wanted to spend his time either on homework or with family. I understood those two things were more important, so I suggested that he txt me instead from now on; he agreed. I told him that I was just afraid he wouldn't txt me, and he said he probably wouldn't since he doesn't txt any of his friends unless it's about a homework assignment.
I suggested that we hang out instead, just the two of us guys. He said that was weird to him because he doesn't like hanging out with only one person. He said that we see and talk to each other enough at school, and if I wanted to hang out, then I should invite a lot of people and have a party, in which case he'd come. My problem is this: when we hang out or talk to each other at school, we're constantly surrounded by other people; there's really no opportunity for personal interaction. We can't bag on teachers just for kicks, or talk about the stuff we normally would talk about one-on-one when we're around other people all the time. I told him I feel like he makes no effort, and he just said that he really doesn't make effort with any of his friends.
I mentioned that I would be graduating soon and I was afraid I wouldn't see my junior best friends anymore (which would include "Joe"). He said that's what happens when seniors graduate and that he obviously can't visit me after, but I could come visit all of them at school once in a while, and maybe txt him occasionally after I graduate.
I feel like I should drop kick this effortless friend straight out of my life, but then I remember just how much fun we have when we're actually just one-on-one, and he's my only male best friend. During my sophomore year and the start of my junior year, I was sort of the same way; I'd be satisfied with just family and homework and wouldn't feel the need to socialize outside of that world. I would also criticize others for everything I saw them doing wrong and be incapable of accepting responsibility when in direct communication with others, but then when I was alone, I would think about everything I should've done differently and how much of a f*** up I was, and that I had to improve. So I feel like if this is the same situation with him, then he might need me as a friend. I can empathize, but I'm faced with the question: is this good enough for me? Should I put so much of my own energy into someone who might be completely unmoved if one day I suddenly dropped out of his life for good? Help!!