Ok So I Need Help....

[Biscuithead13]

So I've been bicurious for two years now. I've cuddled with a couple guys before and like it very much :lol: but havn't gone any farther than that, I haven't really experimented I guess. I cant deny that I'm way more attracted to guys than girls. I actually had a gf a little over two months ago but broke up with her after a near two month relationship. I'm perfectly fine with me being bi but just when I think when I might tell someone I think I am I cant bring myself to do it. I'm just so unsure about it. I've had a few people tell me they remind of gay/bi guys but thats mainly because girls tell me I have that "adorableness and innocence" about me. I talk really sweet sounding, which is probably kind of odd for a straight guy, but outside of that there would be no clues I am bi. This has just been bothering me for so long and I kinda wanna know what I should do about it.....

[Swagamemmnon]

If you're problem is that people think you behave in a stereotypically gay fashion, there isn't much you can do about it. Sure, you could join the football team or something else "manly" but you shouldn't do that unless it makes you happy. Also, a study by a scientist (I'm sorry, I can't remember who), proved that subconsciously, many people can tell the sexuality of others (although they rarely becomes consciously aware). Sorry if this isn't much help.

[CrossingtheCourtyard]

Sooo, you're rather certain that you are bisexual, but you can't... (Reads a bit more thoroughly again...)

I think I understand. You are comfortable with the idea of being bisexual, but when you think about coming out you become a bit nervous? I think I get that. You don't really want the whole stigma of homosexuality and bisexuality thrown on you, right?

I don't want to make this about me, but maybe I can make it seem a bit more personal by sharing a similar experience?

I am bisexual, I'm willing to admit that to myself. I like girls way too much to be gay, and I like guys way too much to be straight. I can see myself getting married, sharing a home, a life and a future with either a guy or a girl.
It's just when I think about being 'Out' and people knowing that I'm bi and thinking that they'll treat me like I'm... different that I get cold feet.

I am aware that some people I know may suspect that I'm not straight. In grade eight a female friend of mine said I reminded her of the gay guy from "Mean Girls" and more recently another friend of mine said I talk as fast as a girl (To which I started speaking extremely slowly. She shut up about it.). The idea of being 'out' is scary. Freeing, but scary.

But... I don't really know that I answered your question or helped. Could you elaborate a bit more please?

[tylerh]

Ya dude going throigh the same thing but haven't "cuddeled" lol..... Even though wouldn't mind it. Yay I know I'm a lil young but mom always said to try sumtin new lol

[Biscuithead13]

Ok so I told my friend (she happens to be my ex gf lol but shes cool with bi guys) and she took it really well :) so now I have two friends and a cousin who know....They are all girls though and I'm still concerned about what guys in my family would think and guy friends and stuff but I have time to figure it out tho....So now im just wondering, well if I would be interested in a bf at some point which I am, I kinda have no choice but to come out to quite a bit of people, cuz otherwise other bi/gay guys wouldnt know about you and probably wouldnt have interest in you, thats my thinking, anyway.

[CrossingtheCourtyard]

I'm glad to hear your friend took it well! There's only one person who know's I am bisexual and that is a friend of mine.

Well, I suppose some male friends might be apprehensive, but good friends shouldn't judge junk. If they do end up a bit nervous you could just explain that you aren't interested in them just because you are bisexual.

When I want to get a feel on someone's opinions on bisexuality, I try and slip it into conversation. My dad love's Buddhist philosophies and stuff, so one day we were talking about it and I slipped a question asking about their views on homosexuality. While he answered the question, his tone and behavior about it suggested he had no problems with non-heterosexual people. You could try and get a sense of people's opinions first before you start to come out :)

You don't necessarily have to come out in order to get a boy friend, you could remain closeted and still have a boy friend. Though, that might be difficult, and you'd have to talk to him about it. And it also might not be fair to him.

Also, you don't need to come out to a lot of people, just the one's that matter to you. Actually, the only person you really need to actually come out to is yourself, I think.

Well I'm interested in people without knowing their sexual orientation first. Some gay or bi guys might be interested in you without knowing your orientation too--it's possible, and if I may say so without being a creeper, I think you're cute so there's no reason they wouldn't! But yes, the more who know, I suppose the more likely it is you might be approached by someone.

[caden048]

im glad your friend took it well....all of my friends that i have told have took it well to

[bwdude15]

If you're Bi, then no big deal bro. A REAL best friend would stick with you no matter what you are. its the person on the inside...not the outside (or sexuality). As long as you're happy! Right now, only one of my best friends knows, and she totally cool with it!! Probably cause it was a girl...but still. You gotta do what you gotta do. People her can't tell you to tell people...you gotta learn that on your own.

[caden048]

look at it this way if you are bi that doubles your chance for a date ;)

[KarkatLuv]

Bi = More fun and adventurous life, you get to have the hots for double the people. i told my friend, but that ended with almost everyone in my same year knowing, which i didn't mind, but i found out a very good rule the hard way: don't tell people who you like ESPECIALLY if that person is a gossip, you can read more about that in my blog if you want

[Evancosta]

Coming out fully will bring you a lot of judgement and hate from people. I'm just being honest. Especially being bisexual, you bring on the controversy of liking the same sex AND the controversy of people saying, "Being bi isn't possible, it's either one or the other." be prepared to deal with that. People may not always say it to your face, but in highschool, there's always room to talk behind somebodies back.

[Biscuithead13]

Well I've finally figured out I am bi so got that straightened out :) I actually lean more towards guys and talking with my friend the other day (a girl haha) we both agreed that I'm probably gonna end up gay at some point :P I am emotionally attracted to both guys and girls but I really only get physically attracted to guys. Soooo yeah :) Guess now I just have to find my footing a lil bit.

[Gordo]

Well I've finally figured out I am bi so got that straightened out :) I actually lean more towards guys and talking with my friend the other day (a girl haha) we both agreed that I'm probably gonna end up gay at some point :P I am emotionally attracted to both guys and girls but I really only get physically attracted to guys. Soooo yeah :) Guess now I just have to find my footing a lil bit.

That's a big step man, great for you! keep me posted.

[Biscuithead13]

That's a big step man, great for you! keep me posted.

Will do bro :) Im just kinda all over the place still with how to go about life now though....eh :/

[ExhibitG]

yeah I'm feeling like I'm bi too, but so unsure at this point. I relate to you a little bit. good luck :)

[CrossingtheCourtyard]

Well congrats bro! That's awesome news :)

[Hugger]

I guess you can say I'm somewhat like you...mostly "innocence" thing. And my best friend does joke about me being gay sometimes or bi. At least you've come out to someone. I have no advice. Just wishing u luck.

[randomme]

not to much should change really other than the obvious you like guys