For Bi teens only

[Frankie66]

ok, for starters i have recently come out to my best friend (a girl) and no one else. so next weekend im supposed to hang out with another friend who is a guy, but i have had a crush on the dude for a while, and he does not know about me being bi and for having a crush on him. Do I tell him, and possible ruin my friendship or just keep it to myself? any feedback would be appreciated?:confused: :confused:

[Jmihas]

Yeah, I have crush on my best friend's who is a boy too but I would have asked "Would you go out with a boy?".

It may work!!

[bwdude15]

^ I agree...but you should totally take it slow. i know you wouldn't want too lose a relationship. Just ask the simple question "would you go out with a dude". dont say it like you wanna know...say it like you dont really care...if that makes sense :P

[Frankie66]

Ok, thanks for the advice I will definatly ask him so yah thx I also like really want a relationship and I've never had a "real" one before...

[CUTEBOY]

i think u should tell him in a relax and casual manner.
got skype?add me..

janolocsin2011

[CrossingtheCourtyard]

I don't want to sound negative in what I'm saying, so please don't take it that way. I'm just trying to be a bit pragmatic.

Not to try and discredit what other's have been saying, but if you are aiming to be discreet, asking "Would you got out with a boy?" could still be a bit of a red flag. He may get suspicious.

I've been in a similar situation, I tried to subtly bring up the topic of bisexuality and wasn't very clever about it. They immedietly suspected something was up. If you are trying to gauge his feelings on relationships with guys you may want to be a bit more subtle.

I think this situation calls for a lot of tact and thought. You should think of what you are going to say, and how he will respond and try and plan what you will say for whatever it is that he says. Be ready for any situation and any outcome.
There's a lot of potential for this to go well, but there's equal potential that it will go very badly. I think you should plan accordingly.

That may sound a little over the top, but I think it might pay off. If you aren't trying to be subtle, then by all means, a more blunt approach could work just as well. Sometimes just coming out (bad pun) and saying what's on your mind is the best approach :)

Coming out to him and telling him that you have feelings for him could be a lot to swallow at once though, don't you think?

Perhaps you should tell him that you have something important to tell him, and then reveal that you are bisexual. From this point, you can try and talk to him about it and his feelings. It might not be the best idea to tell him that you have strong feelings for him right after you come out though, he may need time to think it over. Just try and get a feel of how he's handling things, and then decide how to proceed. You really have to exercise your empathy skills.

Also, you haven't come out to anyone but your best friend, right? If you come out to him, and for some reason things go badly, he may tell other people that your bisexual. You should be ready for that scenario, and think about whether or not you want to risk being outed to other people in your life--classmates, other friends and your family.

Personally, I think you should tell him you have feelings for him! No risk no reward ;) Just be careful how you word things and if he doesn't react well, just let him know that you aren't trying to force anything on him and just wanted him to know. If he reacts well, then perhaps try and further things, maybe even ask him out!

I hope that I'm not sounding dramatic and over the top with all this, but I am in a relatively similar situation. I am, for the most part, a closeted bisexual teenage guy with feelings for one of my very few male friends. All the stuff I've said up here is what I've been going through in my head.

Godspeed to you Frankie! I wish you the best of luck with this!

[Frankie66]

Wow thx for all the advice :)