Acting Feminine?

[Sire]

Not sure how to start this off, but here goes:



I live in South Texas, center of the Christian Bible Belt of the South; to give you a perspective of how HARDCORE the religion (and conservatism) is here,

1. Rick Perry is our Governor
2. Republican word is Law.
3. We had a law that Sodomy is punishable by life imprisonment until the late 1900's
4. 2 Churches on almost every road.
5. We have 17 students in our school that are not Christians ( 14 atheists, 2 jews, and 1 muslim) out of 2000 kids.

Now then, I was raised to learn that "Being gay is BAD BAD BAD BAD!!!!" I did not really give a damn, I'm proud of who I am, and would not give this up for my LIFE. (It is my life; IT'S ME) But in the closet still, I can't even RISK being out to my peers or else I would probably get kicked out of my home, be persecuted daily, and generally be hated by the community. But again, I have NO problem with being in the closet, we have a slightly "underground" network of gays, so I know a good 20+ gay people in my town.

And here is the issue: Never once have I been feminine. Until now. I'm suddenly attracted to the idea of being a limp-wristed idiot (Sorry to those who are offended by this, I am just really really pissed off and confused right now, I really like femmy guys) , am tempted to speak in the metro-sexual (horrifyingly Cliche) voice. And have a sudden addiction to wearing bright stuff, hell, I even bought a damned RAINBOW RING. Why am I suddenly feeling like this? I hate the idea so much, and it is literally a deadly attraction for me.

Has anyone gone through this before? How did you get over it? Did you embrace it?

[Donkey]

I honestly have never felt like that man and I do not like feminine guys at all.. I guess it is all about hormone levels and how many more typical female hormones are being released into your bloodstream than before. Who knows. Either way, there are a lot of feminine gay guys out there.. maybe it is about accepting yourself. You don't have to be feminine to be gay - I'm not - but I guess it is more a character trait

[Sire]

I honestly have never felt like that man and I do not like feminine guys at all.. I guess it is all about hormone levels and how many more typical female hormones are being released into your bloodstream than before. Who knows. Either way, there are a lot of feminine gay guys out there.. maybe it is about accepting yourself. You don't have to be feminine to be gay - I'm not - but I guess it is more a character trait

That's the thing, I really do not like fems that much (I mean I am tolerable of it, but yeah) And have no idea why I want to act like this. It is creeping me out, and I want it to stop, _._

[AppealToReason]

Pfft, more like east Texas. :P
Anyways, although I don't consider myself gay (yet), and have never had this happen, so I don't know why it's happening to you. I know it can be tough down here to be open. Hell, I wore yellow last year and had "Are you gay?" comments all day. Only thing I can say is an obvious answer, just hide it. If it's only just happening, it's more than likely just a phase. If it doesn't go away, then hide it in public, but embrace around those who you're comfortable with. Stupid advice, but I don't think there's much you can do.

[Sire]

Pfft, more like east Texas. :P
Anyways, although I don't consider myself gay (yet), and have never had this happen, so I don't know why it's happening to you. I know it can be tough down here to be open. Hell, I wore yellow last year and had "Are you gay?" comments all day. Only thing I can say is an obvious answer, just hide it. If it's only just happening, it's more than likely just a phase. If it doesn't go away, then hide it in public, but embrace around those who you're comfortable with. Stupid advice, but I don't think there's much you can do.

Houston, so yeah, south east Texas xP

[italianopalo]

I'd say embrace it and flaunt it if you think that's the real you and being true to yourself, and if you think it's safe enough to do so. Don't just do it to conform to stereotypes e.g. camp. Maybe act like that when you're around people you trust, not just in general public, but I would have assumed Houston, being a big city, is at least a little more accepting of individuality.

But remember, don't equate fem=gay, it's definitely not a direct relationship. I personally am straight (I think), and I am kinda feminine and have always felt like that, so I've always been accepting of that. Never felt discriminated because of it in New Zealand though.

[Spence97]

yaa i wouldnt worry about it too much its probably just ur hormones acting out at something crazy like that

[ImCoolBeans]

I honestly have never felt like that man and I do not like feminine guys at all.. I guess it is all about hormone levels and how many more typical female hormones are being released into your bloodstream than before. Who knows. Either way, there are a lot of feminine gay guys out there.. maybe it is about accepting yourself. You don't have to be feminine to be gay - I'm not - but I guess it is more a character trait

I agree with Jon, it could be hormone related or just you subconsciously accepting it. Who knows.

[Can'tHelpIt]

Nah not me, but when your 18 I advise you to get the hell outta there!

[SlightlySane]

There are a few possibilities of what could cause this in my opinion.

While you are not necessarily attracted to the feminine characteristics you also seem very confident in yourself and who you are. Stating that you're in an area that is not very accepting of gay people it could be a rebellious type matter. I'm not saying you're trying to be a bad kid or anything. Just maybe you are trying to be sure you represent the fact that you really don't care what anyone has to say, you're going to be you.

Another possibility is media related stereotypes. I find MANY gay men who fit every stereo type on the dot. I don't think this is how you are, but a lot of them feel a need to act this way to draw attention to themselves or put emphasis on their sexuality. In my opinion this is a form of cowardly femininity for gay males who can't stand up for themselves or build courage to ask other gay men out. So they "over gay" themselves to make sure everyone knows they are. I really don't think this is you though.

Hormones are a small possibility but I really don't think that's it. I have some feminine structures to my appearance, many actually, but I have an incredibly masculine and hard headed personality. I don't take the football captain type appearance, but I can still keep up with the best of athletes. You'll find that feminine and masculine traits vary from person to person regardless of gender or sexuality. In this case it's not so much about hormones as it is being comfortable with yourself. Masculine and feminine qualities are defined dependent on the social environment.

Given my best opinion based on observation I would say it's a rebellious phase. You're confident! You know who you are! You're going to make sure everyone knows so and won't take it away from you! Let this phase ride itself out, you'll settle a little bit after a while and probably won't be so frustrated and confused.

Act, dress, and speak in a way that comes naturally to you. You shouldn't have to think about it at all.

[lausonfarleyii]

People say I can be an ass and start acting like a bitch when I have an attitude but I'm a solid person I can fight and act like a hard man it depends on who I'm around

[Cicero]

That's exactly how I was raised. Don't get offended: but I believe Sodomy is wrong. But Christians where you live should accept you. The bible even says dont judge others, until you have gotten the piece of dust out of your own eye. When you have gotten that piece if dust from your own eye, then you may help you brethren out and get the piece out of his own eye.
Here's the thing with me, is that even though for me personally I cannot judge what gays do, because I have my own sins that's I must confront. So if someone were to find out, don't just the the bible in their face and say don't judge.

What you should say is this:

"Well Jesus says that he wants us to love and respect everyone. Why judge me for what I like/do, when you have your own sins you should work out? Jesus hung around the worst of the worst people during his day, and still he didn't shun them. Doesn't being a Christian mean to be Christ like, and would Jesus Christ go around saying "Your going to hell!"? Or would he want to help them repent and turn from their way of life?"

That right their would shut any of them up. even if you don't agree with a few things in that paragraph, you should really say it because that will make them not only mad, but evaluate how they are being.

[LuckyLuke]

I'm a straight male but pretty damn flamboyant.

I embrace it.

It doesn't help get the ladies, turns most of them away in fact (you'd think a guy who can talk shoes would get a girl but you'd be wrong) but I couldn't stand looking in the mirror day after day knowing that I'm not living the life of who I truly am, hiding it in fact.

I'm loud. I'm obnoxious. I love fashion. I hate football. Can't stand sports of any type. But I love women and women alone (in more ways than one if you catch my drift ;) ). It may not be the life others want me to live and it may not be in my best interest when looking for a girl but frankly, I don't care. This is who I am.

I hope that you look at who you are a consider whether or not it's worth playing someone you're not or embracing who you are.

[Shadowin]

i do have a feminine voice and manner sometimes but the behavior of your town is more tight then mine. This is how i would go about it that you have a very loose manner of things if you start acting feminine and tell people that if it bothers them then they can leave they dont have to deal with you you are who you are no one can change that.

[MalditoDia]

Nah not me, but when your 18 I advise you to get the hell outta there!

Im with this guy my dude !

[Ace_of_Spades]

Well, i started acting more girly and wearing makeup after i came out. I just decided that i've nothing to hide so i'll do whatever i want ^^ And so my theory is, that since you know a bunch of gay guys now, you're no longer closely guarding that secret and so you don't feel like you have to hide it that much, or you're just subconsciously doing what they do because you hang out with them.

[Kdude146]

I am feeling the same way right now I really want to where pink and I have given into it and idc what people think of me but I am still acting like myself

[Sire]

Well, i started acting more girly and wearing makeup after i came out. I just decided that i've nothing to hide so i'll do whatever i want ^^ And so my theory is, that since you know a bunch of gay guys now, you're no longer closely guarding that secret and so you don't feel like you have to hide it that much, or you're just subconsciously doing what they do because you hang out with them.

Only one is a Femmy guy, and I hate him with all of my heart xD


You know who you are.

[Mtc 10]

Honestly, i strongly dislike femmy gay guys. haha.. and ive never understood.. how gays can say they arent str8 but are attracted to like SUPER girly guys.. who you would never know is a guy. but anyways.. I disagree with femmy acting gay guys i think that men should act like men, why would you want to act like a woman?? And it really anoys me when they try TOO hard to be femmy. Its annoying.. But hey I deal with it. We have gays at my school.. My state is super conservative too but tolerant. we have cross dressers.. VERY femmy guys.. all of it. We even have like one of the biggest pride parades in the U.S... thousands come out.!

[secondsight800]

I actually am in the same situation... It really just boils down to what you feel comfortable with. I don't really care for that "in your face" homosexuality either but sometimes i have had some "femmy" traits. Its really not a problem at all and pretty normal, as long as your beliefs and personality stays the same and a way you're happy with, it really doesn't matter how you look or what you wear..

[Human]

wait, so you're just feminine and not gay?
then it should be fine anyway

[Bradley 97]

Tell me about it! My dad was a pastor! And I also live in texas where we get no respect for dealing with the jerks!