I'm Having Problems With My Dad

[Nick E.]

Nearly every day - weekends especially, since my mom works and my dad watches my siblings and I - my father and I fight. Normally, it's over incredibly stupid things, but sometimes he genuinely hurts me.

I've lived all my life with this man, and he has inflicted the most searing emotional pain I've ever felt.

I have to call my mother all the time to make sure nothing happens with us or to defend my brother and sister from his constant bullying. It bugs her and they fight - especially when she's on her monthly cycle.

My father blames me for their fights, calling me names like "sadistic," "brat," and most recently, "motherfucker."

He drinks regularly, but not to the point of which he gets drunk, but sometimes just enough that makes him a bit tipsy. That's usually when my mom and he fight.

I'm worried about my sanity, because I'm constantly thinking about terrible things that he "deserves." When I'm washing dishes and I come across a knife... It pains me so much.

I know I'll never visit him as an adult.

So, I need some help here. What do I need to do? Should I visit my high school's counselor, or should I take it a bit farther and try to get therapy?

[Music Lover]

A few things i think you should do.
Try to talk to your dad or get your mom to talk to him about this. He has a problem with aggression and he needs to acknowledge that. After that has been done, he can try change his ways. In any case, do your best to help him change.
Also, don't be aggressive yourself. If this is already your notion, good. If it's not, take it up. If you do not initiate or help the fights grow, they may reduce in number.
And yes, you should at least visit your school counselor and seek advice on how to deal with the effects of your father's abuse. Depending on what the counselor says, decide on whether you should also get therapy.
Try to love your dad as a person, although you may detest what he does. I daresay there are some underlying reasons why he is abusive and that he should get help. Both the abuser and the abuse victim need help.
And lastly, I don't know whether you believe in prayer, but I believe it can help. Ask for God to help your family out in this. :) Hope I didn't miss anything or misunderstand :)