Wouldn't do this normally...*trigger*

[RustyRockets]

Right now I'm in the worst place I've been for a while. For the first time in about 18 months I'm suicidal to the point that I'm scared it will happen. My arm is ruined from cutting today and I've had to strap it up to stop it bleeding. My girlfriend is away, the only person I can tell, and I'm hiding my relapse from my family. I can't even get through to my therapist.

I'm getting desperate :/

[flumeendeavors]

What can i do to help? I know exactly how it feels to be in your position and trust me, suicide is not an option. The pain might seem too much to bear right now but you can and will get through this. Tell me what you need. I will try to help you as much as possible. <3

[RustyRockets]

Thank you, really, I'm just making myself worse by feeling so alone and isolated. It's good to know people are out there. I'm scared of myself tonight

[flumeendeavors]

Well dear, i honestly think that you will be okay. I know that its hard to be alone but please just try to occupy yourself and try to stay either here online or call someone. if you dont feel safe ... maybe you should consider calling a crisis line or going to a hospital okay?

[RustyRockets]

I'm too ashamed to do that. I considered going earlier when a wound on my arm got a bit out of hand but it's better now so all I want to do is curl up. I've moved some pills out of my room so that they are further away and I've got some distance between me and them. Apart from that and trying to find any distraction there isn't much to do.

It makes me feel calmer to know that someone is thinking of me, you didn't have to say anything at all, and you did, so thank you very much.

[flumeendeavors]

Of course. <3 Stay strong dear. I will be here for you when you need me. Just know that i am thinking of you and praying for you tonight. I want you to remember that even when you think that no one cares about you, there is still me. I will be thinking of you. You can get through this. :)