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View Full Version : Approaching Comet is Really a Borg Cube From Jesus


Perseus
December 2nd, 2011, 05:43 PM
There's nothing better than a wild UFO conspiracy theory — unless it's a UFO theory that wraps in a debunked comet, the Catholic Church, and Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Conspiracy theorists believe that Comet Elenin is rapidly approaching Earth, and that it's a perfect cube. A cube piloted by cyborgs who seek to assimiliate the human race into their collective. A Borg Cube, in other words. Yes, the writers of Star Trek: The Next Generation "were being prophetic" when they created the Borg, writes extraterrestrial expert Alex Collier over at the Canadian National Newspaper. (http://www.agoracosmopolitan.com/news/ufo_extraterrestrials/2011/12/02/2047.html)

(For what it's worth, NASA says Comet Elenin was destroyed in October (http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/asteroids/news/elenin20111025.html), and it was never going to be an issue in any case. But that's just what you'd expect them to say.)

So Comet Elenin wasn't actually destroyed, and it's a perfect cube, and this proves the Borg are real. Okay. But it doesn't stop there — apparently this Borg cube is known as the Galactic Olibiteration Device, or G.O.D. for short. And there's tons of evidence that Christianity and the Bible are really about how Jesus is a Borg (http://www.luciferianliberationfront.org/borg.html) and he's coming to assimilate us. Just look at the image up top, depicting "Jesus of Borg." Apparently this is spelled out in the Book of Revelation.

Over at the Luciferian Liberation Front, there's an article (http://www.luciferianliberationfront.org/borg.html) that spells out how going to Heaven is really a metaphor for joining the Borg:
http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/8/2011/12/medium_9d03ce8348552015d3bbcab6bbbc6338.gif
When we dissect the cube of heaven we see that it is constructed like a living cell with its own system of energy circulation and metabolism. (See diagram) From all appearances it is a giant soular battery/generator which allows the ONE mind of the collective G.O.D. to be able to feed off the life essences of the enslaved souls held within its "temple pillars" and redirect their energies according to the will of the ONE. ... Will YOU be a "pillar" in the temple of God?Those spirits which have little or no self-will and have been sufficiently programmed to serve G.O.D. during their lives will have the highest nourishment potential. The Bible tells us what will happen to those who are selected as purest and most worthy to provide sustenance to G.O.D. They will be made "pillars" in the temple of God (Rev. 3:12). They will become a PART of the New Jerusalem and will nourish G.O.D. and "their tears will be wiped away and there shall be no more death neither sorrow nor crying neither shall there be any more pain for the FORMER THINGS are passed away." (Rev. 21:4) Sure, there won't be any more crying! All their memories will be wiped clean. They will no longer exist in a form that is recognizable to them or anyone else.

There's also a nice bit where they compare eternal life in Heaven to joining the Q Continuum, which Star Trek: Voyager proved was so boring that members of the Continuum would choose to commit suicide or become Civil War reenactors.

So will YOU be ready when Jesus of Borg arrives?

Funniest conspiracy theory ever. (http://io9.com/5864585/awesome-new-ufo-theory-approaching-comet-is-really-a-borg-cube-from-jesus)

SosbanFach
December 2nd, 2011, 05:52 PM
How did I not see this before? It is all so clear now! Those lying bastards at NASA, how dare they? Tell the general public a load of bullshit about the cube having never been a cube, and that it was destroyed in October, and the truth's bound to out. Thank you soooo much Alex Collier, showing up those dishonest fuckers! All hail the Borg!

OK, seriously now, does he honestly believe this? It sounds to me like he's just attention seeking, and what easier way of gaining fame overnight than predicting that the world will end, or colonisation from a whole load of extra-terrestrial deities is imminent?

kenoloor
December 2nd, 2011, 06:11 PM
Well, obviously.

ShatteredWings
December 2nd, 2011, 07:11 PM
....lmfao. Wow.

terminoob
December 3rd, 2011, 11:32 PM
I'll be ready as soon as I change out of my red shirt.

Anselmo
December 4th, 2011, 11:37 AM
There is no cubes in the Universe, because when the centripetal force and centrifugal force are the same in one object it makes the boundary of matter equidistant from the center, like a sphere (NOT a perfect sphere, because that does not exist) which means that there are NO cubes around there.

Coments barely spin in their own axis which means that the centripetal force and centrifugal force are not the same, but still it can't be a cube, it's impossible, just like a sphere, there is no perfect sphere in our universe.

Sage
December 4th, 2011, 11:53 AM
I don't see how this is any less ridiculous than actual religious beliefs.

Anselmo
December 4th, 2011, 12:03 PM
I still have no idea why people belive in such stupid things, that doesn't make any sense and are physically impossible ( i'm talking about the cube, not God or Jesus)

The Dill
December 4th, 2011, 12:13 PM
Oh my lol.....

Sage
December 4th, 2011, 12:16 PM
I still have no idea why people belive in such stupid things, that doesn't make any sense and are physically impossible ( i'm talking about the cube, not God or Jesus)

Where do you draw the line?

Anselmo
December 4th, 2011, 12:21 PM
Where do you draw the line?

What line?

Sage
December 4th, 2011, 01:23 PM
What line?

Impossibility and sense. What criteria are you judging by that says this belief is silly, and other beliefs are perfectly rational and unspectacular?

Anselmo
December 4th, 2011, 01:33 PM
Impossibility and sense. What criteria are you judging by that says this belief is silly, and other beliefs are perfectly rational and unspectacular?

Im didn't said that the belief was silly,(at least that wans't my intention) i just said that there was no such things as cubes in space, because comets have some rotation, a very very small rotation, which mean it can't be a cube, also when approaches a star it start melting so it can't be perfect cube. With this i just want to show that if that happen it will no be a cube.

Sage
December 4th, 2011, 01:36 PM
Im didn't said that the belief was silly,(at least that wans't my intention)

Impossible beliefs are pretty silly.

Anselmo
December 4th, 2011, 01:39 PM
Impossible beliefs are pretty silly.

Yes, they are. This belief might not be impossible, but some parts (like the comet with the shape of cube) are.

Kahn
December 4th, 2011, 10:58 PM
I'm ready. THE BORG WILL SAVE ME.

IAMWILL
December 5th, 2011, 02:31 AM
Originally posted by some crazy fucktard Hahahahahahaha

This is fricken great. I know a girl thats like a die hard star trek fan I need to show this to her.