Should I count it?

[Megson]

I was on day 15, I believe, but I may have relapsed... I don't know if I should count this one.

I had my razor with me and I kind of lightly ran the corner of it over my thigh repeatedly. It didn't hurt at all. It was like scratching with my fingernails.

And, well, I guess I did it too many times. I have several scratches now on my thigh that look almost like cat scratches. They didn't bleed, but they did leave a mark. I'm a little stuck on whether or not I should consider it cutting. I wasn't really upset or anything. A little anxious and stressed, yes, but not to the point of self-harm.

What do you think? Should I reset my clean streak back to day 0?

[WeArePeppers]

I think you should,because you were nervous and stressed and you did use that razor,even if it didn't bleed you repeatedly scratched yourself.There are people who scratch themselves with their nails to the point of bleeding as a way to self-harm,even if it wasn't hurting you did it all over again,didn't you?Do i sound accusing?if i do,it's not my intention,hell i do the same thing sometimes :/

[Wakoabs]

Self harm is anything that leaves a mark. count it as selfharm and now you have a goal to reach. X

[georgiamay]

Self harm is anything that leaves a mark.

What about overdoses then? Self harm is anything that's physically damaging in anyway.

But this is a grey area for me. If you did it because you wanted to either cause yourself physical pain, or give yourself that mark, then yes it is. Self harm is a deliberate act, so you had to want to hurt yourself or to give yourself a scratch or something like that.

[StoppingTime]

I really do think so. You did self harm. It left a mark.

Its OK, you'll get back on track again soon though. I know you can :)

[Jupiter]

Hey, I'm sorry, but yes. You did relapse. You need to learn from it. I don't think that if you don't count it you won't learn.

[RAWWR]

I don't know, it doesn't seem like it was like your usual self harm, it was a set back but I Wouldn't say you're right back to the beggining, go back to 10 days or something, that way it's acknowledged but not as serious as it would have been...

[Jupiter]

I don't know, it doesn't seem like it was like your usual self harm, it was a set back but I Wouldn't say you're right back to the beggining, go back to 10 days or something, that way it's acknowledged but not as serious as it would have been...

That's a good plan.

[Amaryllis]

It doesn't matter if it bleeds, if it's cutting, burning, scratching, biting, hitting, drug overdosing, starving, puking or hair pulling. Self-harm is when you harm yourself intentionally.

Are you less likely to fall back as your number of non-self harm days increase? If so, don't count it. If it doesn't make much of a difference, count it if you'd like.

Let me ask you something, and everyone else who keeps a non-self harm calendar: Do you plan to stop?

Perhaps you've noticed that I stopped posting in the non-self harm calendar. This is because I don't plan to stop. I'm not ready to and I don't want to. When you start counting the numbers, you're meant to try to get the number of non self-harm days to increase and get bigger and bigger. It's a way of patting yourself on the back and saying "Hey, I did it."

When you feel like cutting, think of how far you've gone. You don't want to ruin that number, do you? Or you'll have to start over. That's what I think the calendar is meant to do, to keep you motivated.

You stumbled a bit, that's okay. Pick yourself back up and next time, you'll do even better. Good luck, hun <3

[Megson]

I'm a bit hazy on wether or not I plan to stop or not. I count my SH free days, yes. I feel accomplished when I go for a while...But I also don't want to stop cutting. I feel like its my right to do so. It works.

Societal pressure is the only thing pushing me to quit.

[StoppingTime]

I'm a bit hazy on wether or not I plan to stop or not. I count my SH free days, yes. I feel accomplished when I go for a while...But I also don't want to stop cutting. I feel like its my right to do so. It works.

Societal pressure is the only thing pushing me to quit.

I can promise you that it is a better decision to stop.

[Megson]

I can promise you that it is a better decision to stop.

Why do you say that? Sure, I'll have scars. But I find myself rather attached to them.

I know it gets harder to quit the longer you go. I have a little experience with that. But I would continue this without a worry if it wasn't so looked down on in society...

[Alexithymia]

Well, to answer your question: yes. But honestly, don't think about it in terms of "I can't do anything bad for this long." Think of it as something that you're trying to get over. I'm not promoting self-harm, but I'm also not saying that when you're trying to quit, relapsing every now and then is terrible. It's how I stopped.

This is just a little bump in the road, but the road keeps going. You don't have to start all over. Just say that you're on "Day 15, but with a little bump." Don't give up. Don't let small things get to you. And most importantly, know that you do have the strength to stop.