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Amaryllis
October 31st, 2011, 08:44 AM
When I was a little; I had a town, illustrated on a carpet. I used to walk on the roads with my fingers and visit the little 2-dimensional houses.

One night, my mother woke up after a nightmare. She gripped my arms with both hands and shook me, screamed in my face. I don't remember what she said, I don't remember why she was so angry. But her eyes, god, they were horrible. They were filled with so much hatred.

She slapped me across the face and I cried. She told me not to cry, that she wasn't doing anything to me that warranted my tears. She held me then, in her arms, and rocked us both back and forth. Back and forth. She told me how she was raped, how the people who raised her told her she wasn't wanted. Nobody loved her.

She kept repeating it, over and over. I told her I didn't want to listen; she said I didn't care. She gripped my arm and bit it. I screamed. She felt bad after that, so she hit herself. She banged her head on the wall and screamed. Over and over.

I was 4 or 5 then.

My mother used to get angry at me, every single day. She would threaten to kill herself. She'd drive while she scolded me, and said she would kill us both. She would scream and hit the steering wheel, hit her head against the steering wheel, hit me. She hit everything.

One time, she drove the car into a tree. I don't remember the actual second when the car hit the tree. I just remember being so, so afraid that she would really hit the tree. I was in primary school. I wanted to live.

God, I thought I was going to die.

My parents said, if they died, I had to die with them. They didn't want me to live a life without them. But mum, dad, my life doesn't revolve around you. But if they couldn't live - I couldn't, either. My parents used to take me on plane rides. I hated them. My mother told me it would crash. It would kill us all. She would be with my father and I forever and ever. The plane was going to crash.

I'm still terrified of falling.

My mother used to take sticks and beat me with them. She'd beat my arms till my wrists were raw and red, till they bled. The beatings really hurt. Not as much as those eyes, though. She'd look at me with eyes filled with hate. So, so much hate.

I've always had to look after my mum. I sleep with the sound of her crying in my ears. It used to happen everyday. I remember gripping my pillow and checking up on my mum to see if she was okay. She'd have her nails in her flesh, rocking back and forth.

"Come here, baby. Come here."

I'd hold her, comfort her. Let her rock me. Because I was afraid she'd kill herself. I still am. Sometimes it gets too much. So I just lie there, eyes wide open, listening to her cry and the occasional scream.

I took on my mother's habits at a young age. The nail digging, hitting, biting since I could form coherent thoughts. And when I was 9 or younger, cutting. I took on her temper, the self-hate. The depression. Even the rape, ma. I know how you feel now.

I try so, so hard though, to be different. I smile, crack stupid jokes, try my best to cheer you up. It doesn't work, though. I'll never be good enough for you, mum. I get straight As. I do what you say. I hug you, tell you I love you. Why can't I fill the holes in your heart, ma? I'll be a good girl. Just smile. Please, please just smile.

Why can you cry, but not me, mama? Why can't I hurt and scream, too? Why won't you see a psychologist? Why do I have to? Why can't I cut, burn and hit myself, when you can? Why do I have to take care of you? Why do I have to be here? Why can't you help me, mama? Why can you kill me when I can't kill myself?

I'm 15 now. I should be over this. I should know better by now, but you got angry today. You sped again. I relived it. I thought I was going to die. The memories will always be there. You still hit me. You still hate me. You and my father do. You said so yourselves. I shouldn't be here, you said. I'm a mistake. So kill me, ma. Kill us both.

I don't think I'd be sorry.

trooneh
October 31st, 2011, 09:06 AM
Hey Z,

You're really not a mistake, whatever your parents might have said. You've helped countless people on here out, including me. Your mother needs help, and you can't blame yourself for that. I know she projected her problems onto you. That isn't fair at all. You've dealt with a lot more than any fifteen year old should. You're a strong and beautiful person, though. Don't you ever forget that. Smart, witty, cool accent, good looking even though I'm gay ( :P ), and we're all here for you. Always. <3

embers
October 31st, 2011, 09:15 AM
Z, it isn't your fault at all that you feel the way you do, and it isn't your fault or mistake that your mother and father do to you what they do. I think it's great that you've let this out because you really needed it. Whenever you need to talk, you know I try and be on Skype when I can.

Stay strong, man <3

DarkHorses
October 31st, 2011, 10:15 AM
I think one thing really needs to be said. It's not your fault. There's absolutely nothing you can do to change the way your mom is. I know it must be so hard to feel that helplessness, like there's nothing you can do. But it also means you don't have to feel the pressure, the pressure that if you're not good enough she will never get better. That's not true. But unfortunately we can't make anyone recover from anything. The choice to recover is within the person suffering. It needs to be your mom's choice to deal with the things that contribute to the way she feels.

There is nothing you can do. That might be a scary thought. But you have no obligation. Obviously you're going to care about your mom, and I'm not telling you that you shouldn't. But you need to value yourself too. You need to look after you. Your mom might never get help. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't.

You can choose to live a life free of abuse. You can choose to break free from the cycle that your parents followed. You don't have to be like them. You are your own person. It's not an inevitable trait that's handed down. You can live a happy life. And you deserve one. Don't let all that is going on break you, and don't lose your hope. Talk to someone about the way things are. Continue getting professional help. I can't tell you things will be better tomorrow. But one day you will be free of this, and you will feel better. Hold on to that day.

I know there's nothing we can say to take away the pain you're going through, but I'm here if you ever need to talk. Just know that people care about you, and you deserve to be here.

Genghis Khan
October 31st, 2011, 03:15 PM
You are by far, the strongest 15 year old girl I've seen here, if not the strongest person. I sometimes actually wonder if you're for real because despite all this bullshit you never deserved, you've come out as a helpful, selfless and good person. I'm glad to call you one of my few vt friends.

Keep it together man. We love you.

SosbanFach
October 31st, 2011, 03:30 PM
It's been a hard life for you, but that part's almost done now. You've under three years. After that, you can get away, if you so desire. After that, you could escape. Remember, none of this is you, none of it is your fault. No matter what your parents tell you, hold that thought. It's them, not you. They're the ones losing out; if they can't see what a wonderful, beautiful daughter they have, they should be ashamed. You deserve better, they shouldn't treat you this way. They don't deserve a daughter as wonderful as you, if you'll forgive me for saying it. A mother shouldn't go to her 5 year old daughter for help, it should be the other way. Your parents are wrong, Z, they're wrong. Wrong about you, their perception of your life is wrong. You aren't a belonging, which can be abused and abandoned. You're a girl, and a strong girl at that. For someone to go through all that you have, and to come out at the end as well as you takes immense courage. Stay strong, stay courageous, Z, it's not long now. I think I speak for all of us here when I say that we would miss you, more than that. We love you, Z, and all that you've done here. We have faith in you. You can make it through the hard times.

Amaryllis
October 31st, 2011, 04:13 PM
You guys are gonna make me friggin cry! Q____Q Oh my god, jesus effing christ, it's so embarrassing to know you read this. Durrrrrrrr. But this other part of me's like, yay, people care, I have friends, finally, I'm getting replies. I could just... Die right now and die happy.

@Sean
Thank you. you have no idea how much it means to me, knowing I've helped people. That's practically my purpose in life. It makes me feel a little less useless(ooohhh yeah. I'm using you. Jk <3) Really, though. Thanks. You're so nice :)

@Sachal
I could just hug you to death right now. Thanks, hun. You're so sympathetic and great and shiz. You're awesome. I'd make a heart at the computer screen but you wouldn't be able to see it. Thank you!

@Amanda
Holy shite. I'm getting a long reply back for once, haha. I feel so... Important. I know, you're right. I just think my existence added to her stress. You're right, though. I need to stop beating myself up.

@Rawal
Awwwwwww. I was on my phone and I didn't see your avatar and name. Then I scrolled and I saw it was you and I was like, D'AWWWW!!!!! That's the nicest thing. I feel so much better now... You really think that? Durg, you gonna make me cry, bro.

Now I want to eaturface.

@Ben
Thank you. It's so... Durr. I've run out of words of appreciation. Haha. Thanks. You're right. Maybe this'll stay with me forever, but I've gotten through it all these years. Okay, I'm 15... But, still! I'll be okay.

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This is like my favourite thread now, haha. I've never gotten so many replies from my friends in the psych ward before. I wish I could personally looovvveee each and every one of you. But you'll have to settle for hugging yourself or each other and pretending that's me. Here, have a maidsperm kick to the ass. :D

http://www.nancyfarmer.net/gal_images/two-mermaids-and-a-maidmer-_web.jpg

Angel Androgynous
October 31st, 2011, 05:35 PM
Aw, Z, I feel like I can't add anything, because everything was said for me. This thread brought tears to my eyes. You are just so strong, so strong. I can't help what cry. You don't deserve this. At all. You are strong, beautiful, talented, kind. I can't believe that this happened to you. Your heart is pure gold in a sea of angst. I can't believe that you can stay this beautiful inside and out. I wish I was that strong... Stay strong, Z. I love you. We love you. <3

xXl0sth0peXx
October 31st, 2011, 06:50 PM
Aw, Z, I feel like I can't add anything, because everything was said for me. This thread brought tears to my eyes. You are just so strong, so strong. I can't help what cry. You don't deserve this. At all. You are strong, beautiful, talented, kind. I can't believe that this happened to you. Your heart is pure gold in a sea of angst. I can't believe that you can stay this beautiful inside and out. I wish I was that strong... Stay strong, Z. I love you. We love you. <3

I was gonna say something.. but then I read this.. and this is what I was going to say..

Z, you are so amazing. you are so strong. keep going love. i/we love you <3

Jupiter
October 31st, 2011, 06:56 PM
Z...
Much like what Yaz said, you are a very strong person. You are a role model. We look up to you. You have a sense of humor, and we love you, girl. I used to think that my life was hard, and I can barely keep it together. Then here you are, with all these stories, and bring tears to people's eyes, and you can look in the mirror, and you can smile. You can show people of the world that you are proud. You ARE the strongest person, the person who's taken the most shit, and the person who I will remember when I am long off of this website. You can seriously deal with all this stuff, that you don't even deserve. Props to you, Z.

Props. :')

And for your mom to scare you, on an airplane. How dare she? I really hope I don't offend you, but... I am surprised you are still living there. You raised your mom? Sounds like a job I have. It's not easy to try to help a parent out with her problems. I love you Z, stay here forever!

smexykid
October 31st, 2011, 07:09 PM
though i have never even talked to u, i can tell u r a very strong person for putting up with that for 15 years.. you are a bigger person than i would've been, because i would've left given my first oppotunity. Don't ever let anyone tell u that u were a mistake or an accident u r ur own individual and by being able to talk about this, it makes u even stronger.....live ur life to the fullest and don't let anyone tell you otherwise

Amaryllis
November 1st, 2011, 12:23 AM
@Ida
Thanks a lot, wifey. To be honest, I never thought I was good, at all. Until a couple weeks ago, before my psychologist told me being able to help people wasn't something everyone could do, I thought I just pretended to be nice when I really wasn't.

But why would I do that, right? I mean, it's not like my friends announce to the world that I helped them or something. And I really do care. I may lack in... Empathy. Actually, durr. I'll stop now. I feel like I'm quoting from my parents and typing it down as my own words. Thank you. :)

@Val
Thanks, sweetheart. It means a lot. You have no idea how happy it makes me, every time you show me such admiration and respect. I've never had that till VT. I'm beginning to get that among all the people who've opened up to me in school, though. But I'm not doing it for that. I just want them and you to smile. Or at least, not feel like shiz. I love you, too! I'm always here if you ever need someone to talk to <3

@Eric
Aww, Eric... That's really, really sweet. Hey, I'm really sorry if I came off as rude, unappreciative or cold in the past. Really, I don't have a problem with you, at all. I think you're really sweet and kind, you're always trying to help and I really do respect you for that. You're 14. Most 14 year olds won't even try to help or understand. You will mature, and I think one day you'll be a great, great person who will help a lot of people.

Chin up, sweetheart.

@smexykid
Thank you. Honestly, although I may say how I'm going to leave her and never come back, I don't think I would. I could never live with that guilt. Just like every person I see who cuts, is depressed or just in need of a help or a friend. I could never leave them stranded. It was horrible when others left me. I want everyone else to live a much, much better life.

Thanks a lot for taking the time to reply. I really do appreciate it. If you ever need anything, I'll be here :)

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I think I'm going to be a social worker and/or a psychologist now.