Are Some of US Losing our Confidence to Websites and the Advances in Technology?

[DerBear]

Hi Guys and Gals

Like the title says are some of us losing our will/confidence to technology and websites?

It’s like now a days if we see someone we like and want to date them some of don’t talk to them we add them on facebook flirt then we come here and go does she like me?

Perfect example as we this all the time and its mostly down to confidence we relying on social network sites to much and that has led with the advancement of technology and new site like 20-30 years ago people did not do this now did they? They wanted to ask someone out they went for it, because they had no choice.

So what do you folks think of this?
Are we loosing ourselves to technology?

p.s Not meaning to cause offense by this post.

[Cybercode]

not to me. i do it because i have low self esteem though.

[DerBear]

not to me. i do it because i have low self esteem though.

But what im saying is I bet you have come to depend on it ever so slightly as you do have low self esteem and low confidance.

[Cybercode]

yeah, but even on the computer, i'm too scared to talk to her in person and on facebook.

[DerBear]

yeah, but even on the computer, i'm too scared to talk to her in person and on facebook.

Well yes, What I was really trying to target was are we doing whats comftorable to us instead of just going out there. Like 20-30 years ago you would have had to options. Speak to her, or Not at all. you know what I mean.

[Cybercode]

Well yes, What I was really trying to target was are we doing whats comftorable to us instead of just going out there. Like 20-30 years ago you would have had to options. Speak to her, or Not at all. you know what I mean.

yeah. kind of like the logic of Formspring. most of the pussies who were too scared to even talk bad about someone face to face used a social network to do it anonymously. same logic, but i think we are getting too dependent on technology. i love it, i'm a geek, but every now and then i like to "unplug" and enjoy life instead of wasting it on the computer.

but yes i think we are.

[DerBear]

yeah. kind of like the logic of Formspring. most of the pussies who were too scared to even talk bad about someone face to face used a social network to do it anonymously. same logic, but i think we are getting too dependent on technology. i love it, i'm a geek, but every now and then i like to "unplug" and enjoy life instead of wasting it on the computer.

but yes i think we are.

And then moving on with that you then have cyber bullying and deppresion because people insult you and you wonder who it is (if it alows you to be anoymis) It leeds to many problems but yes. I think some people are becoming to independant on techology.

Also good Luck cybercode.

[Unique Physique]

I think it all just manifests in a different way. If there wasn't things like Facebook, you would still be shy about a girl/guy you liked - you just wouldn't know as much about them, and if you were that shy, you wouldn't speak to them at all. Facebook has made it easier to do "research" on people (*cough* or stalk...), though. So if you have a crush, you can find out information about them like their likes/dislikes/age/relationship status without talking to them much, so for some, this might make it easier to talk to people.

One problem with Facebook, though, I'd say is the way it can give people the illusion that others are having a much better life than them. Take for example, someone you know who has 300+ friends and likes to take lots of pictures and update their status a lot with things relating to their social life. I.E. "going out for a drink tonight", "last night was great". They can come across as having a perfect life and it's easy to feel really 'left out' when they do this and you suffer from self-esteem problems.

[DerBear]

I think it all just manifests in a different way. If there wasn't things like Facebook, you would still be shy about a girl/guy you liked - you just wouldn't know as much about them, and if you were that shy, you wouldn't speak to them at all. Facebook has made it easier to do "research" on people (*cough* or stalk...), though. So if you have a crush, you can find out information about them like their likes/dislikes/age/relationship status without talking to them much, so for some, this might make it easier to talk to people.

One problem with Facebook, though, I'd say is the way it can give people the illusion that others are having a much better life than them. Take for example, someone you know who has 300+ friends and likes to take lots of pictures and update their status a lot with things relating to their social life. I.E. "going out for a drink tonight", "last night was great". They can come across as having a perfect life and it's easy to feel really 'left out' when they do this and you suffer from self-esteem problems.

Like you said "stalk" "research" these to me are the reason why my facebook is empty because I dont add to it at all because I dont like the idea of social networking. It also means that said stalker is more likely to become mentally ill in some ways because they delvelop obssesions with certian people they like. Before you could not do this,now you can. It can lead to an unhealthy lifestyle.

Also your second paragraph also relates to what I just said obssesions are developed and it makes people feel rather low and even worse about themselves. I had a friend who I feel out with because he was acting like a dickhead all the time so he bad mouthed me on facebook. Does it Solve anything No.

people wont devlop life skill because they hide behind a computer and its just not right. Sure low confidance but how does stalking a person help the original person it dosent.

Also it changes people into an unlikable character and makes people think said person is weird. I mean the guy who stalks someone is less likely to make friends now is he, then you enter a visous circle.

All in all it seems like it does more damage than good. do you agree?

[Amaryllis]

A lot of people aren't very sociable or "good looking", cyber communication has meant that people like those can make friends online. In real life, people tend to be quick to judge. Well, online, too, of course, but at least here people judge you on what you say, not how you look.

It takes 4 minutes and 90 seconds to decide if you're interested in someone. And irl, that isn't even based on what you say. 55% is through body language, 38% is the tone and speed of their voice and only 7% is through what they actually say.

I think the internet really helps those of us who lack confidence. If you took everyone on VT out of here and put us all in the same school and we didn't know each other... Well, we wouldn't be friends. Not likely, anyway. The internet and social networks within the internet allow for diversity. Instead of the typical high school cliques, we have people with brains who may not necessarily be respected in real life but are, here.

I think sometimes technology helps us find who we really are, rather than making us "lose ourselves". Hell, I never knew I could help so many people. I never thought I had a sense of humour. I'm a lot more well-liked on here than I am in real life because here.

On forums and chats, you can think before you post and you can edit your post. In real life, whatever you say can't be taken back and most of the time, we don't think before we speak.

Sure, there are downsides, I've kind of been neglecting my real social life lol. Here, it's much easier for me to choose my friends and the people I talk to. And I can talk to people older and as or more matured than me. In real life, I talk to kids may age, mostly and I find most of them terribly immature and shallow.

Thanks to VT, I like myself a lot more.