Telling therapist about cutting.. [US]

[xXl0sth0peXx]

Well.. I've gotta tell my therapist.. I've pretty much got no other choice..

I had just a general appointment with my GP today.. like a well visit yearly kinda of thing.. and she noticed a few scratches on my hand. Not cuts or anything.. just scratches.. And she sat me down and asked about other cuts [interesting how she assumed I cut? The ones on my hand could be mistaken as cat scratches?].. and I had to tell her and show her [i thought about lying and using the cat excuse but she's probably heard it.. and she'd probably ask to see anyways so lying would make it worse..].. And of course she became really concerned [coming up to my 1 year mark probably doesn't help..].. and wanted to tell my mom.. I told her that I'm seeing a therapist [true] but she doesn't know that I cut.. [also true] and that i've been working up to trusting her enough to tell her.. and that my therapist said that cutting isn't reportable [although my GP disagrees with her [possibly because my therapist doesn't know the degree of my cutting..?].. So she said she'd give me 2 weeks to start getting help and she wants to see me again.. and if I don't get help, she's gonna tell my mom..

So I guess this means I have to tell my therapist.. and I'm freaking out.. because I'm not ready.. not ready to share with people, not ready for my parents to know.. not ready for anything that comes with telling someone..

My GP said possibly if I have a note from my therapist that we're working on helping me and what not, she won't tell my mom.. but I'm still really afraid that it won't work.. or something will go wrong..

So I guess what I wanna know is how do I go about telling my therapist, and what do I expect.. And what is recovery like..
And then when would my parents need to be brought into it.. or when would be good I guess.. And what kind of reaction do I expect from them..

I've been freaking out.. I'm scared and don't know what to do.. I see my GP again in a week, so I see my therapist before then.. I guess I gotta make the most of cutting before I have to stop..

Thank you to anyone who responds..

- V

[ReasonsForWeeping]

telling ur therapist is really whats best talk to ur therapist about the situation with ur mom

[anonymous53]

Tell the therapist, but what is your age and country? Depending on that your GP could lose their license to practice. And don't "Make the most out of cutting" while you can,because it'll make it harder to give up.


So I guess what I wanna know is how do I go about telling my therapist, and what do I expect.. And what is recovery like..
And then when would my parents need to be brought into it.. or when would be good I guess.. And what kind of reaction do I expect from them..

How to go about telling your therapist, you could attempt to write a note to her, like a letter. So this way you couldn't choke up and just say"nevermind" etc.

Depending on your therapist, what to expect can differ. My therapist taught me a lot of lessons on alternative methods to cope. She also at first told me I have to limit myself (Like weening off the cutting). Each time she set the limit lower and lower. She also asked me to tell her honestly whenever I had cut.

As per the parents needing to be involved. It really depends on your therapist and your age/country.
In also depends on what agreements you signed when going into therapy, such as confidentiality agreements. I made sure that my therapist could not tell anything that happened in the sessions to my parents unless I specifically told her to do so. Usually when you're above the age of majority the therapist has to ask you first.

Depending also on the severity of your cuts, some therapists realize it is just a coping method to deal with problems. Some do not, some will see it as suicidal tendencies (Depends on the severity of the cuts) and may even decide to commit you to an inpatient facility.

Overall I wish you luck, it's really hard to talk about it, but I think talking to the therapist will help you recover :)



*edit*

Alright, I just noticed your title said (US) so I assume this means the United States.
Your GP can tell your parents if they believe you are in danger to yourself or others. Your therapist *cannot* tell your parents unless you allow them to (Usually in a contract type format, the one I signed was a "Waiver of Confidentiality" and I had to specify who could be told what about my recovery process.

[xXl0sth0peXx]

telling ur therapist is really whats best talk to ur therapist about the situation with ur mom
lol.. i was asking about how to do it, not whether to do it or not.. but thanks. :)

Tell the therapist, but what is your age and country? Depending on that your GP could lose their license to practice. And don't "Make the most out of cutting" while you can,because it'll make it harder to give up.




How to go about telling your therapist, you could attempt to write a note to her, like a letter. So this way you couldn't choke up and just say"nevermind" etc.

Depending on your therapist, what to expect can differ. My therapist taught me a lot of lessons on alternative methods to cope. She also at first told me I have to limit myself (Like weening off the cutting). Each time she set the limit lower and lower. She also asked me to tell her honestly whenever I had cut.

As per the parents needing to be involved. It really depends on your therapist and your age/country.
In also depends on what agreements you signed when going into therapy, such as confidentiality agreements. I made sure that my therapist could not tell anything that happened in the sessions to my parents unless I specifically told her to do so. Usually when you're above the age of majority the therapist has to ask you first.

Depending also on the severity of your cuts, some therapists realize it is just a coping method to deal with problems. Some do not, some will see it as suicidal tendencies (Depends on the severity of the cuts) and may even decide to commit you to an inpatient facility.

Overall I wish you luck, it's really hard to talk about it, but I think talking to the therapist will help you recover :)



*edit*

Alright, I just noticed your title said (US) so I assume this means the United States.
Your GP can tell your parents if they believe you are in danger to yourself or others. Your therapist *cannot* tell your parents unless you allow them to (Usually in a contract type format, the one I signed was a "Waiver of Confidentiality" and I had to specify who could be told what about my recovery process.

letter isn't a bad idea.. i might do that.. kinda freaky that my GP has to tell..
I also told my therapist that same thing, about confidentiality.
Thank you so much. <3

[snow661]

SHE CANNOT LEGGALLY DO THAT! There a confedentiality laws, dont be afraid to threaten her with that. She seems like she is caring for you, but that is up to you to decide who to tell, not her. DO NOT LET A SHRINK RUN YOUR LIFE! ITS YOUR LIFE!

[Amaryllis]

SHE CANNOT LEGGALLY DO THAT! There a confedentiality laws, dont be afraid to threaten her with that. She seems like she is caring for you, but that is up to you to decide who to tell, not her. DO NOT LET A SHRINK RUN YOUR LIFE! ITS YOUR LIFE!

She actually can. Cutting gets to a place where there is a chance you may die. Each time you cut, there's a chance of bleeding to death or cutting too much. I've been to several psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, counsellors, blabla and each of them have said this: "Everything you say will be kept confidential except in cases where you are harming or intending to harm someone else or yourself."

Contrary to popular belief, most "shrinks" aren't there to mess with your head. They're there to help. Nearly every one of the professionals I have worked with had good intentions. No one can change or shrink your mind. Only you can. Sure, they can say things but hell, if it's not what you want, it's not what you'll get. I've been to a hypnotherapist and no, no matter how many times she tried to get me to end my eating disorders. It didn't work. I had to. Because whatever mental illness it is, no matter how genetic or hormonal it is, you're responsible for your own actions.

Val, sweetheart, I am so proud of you. We're never really "ready". It's always hard, telling someone you cut. It's such a personal thing. Leaving yourself naked like that? It's difficult. Shameful. Painful. Personally, I don't think it's about trust. Each time I see a professional, I'll talk. They don't even have to ask me questions. I don't trust any of them but I'll talk because I want to get better more than anything else.

Do whatever it takes to get better. And your therapist won't focus much on your cutting if you don't talk about it, anyway. My current psychologist asked to see the cuts and I said no. She respected me but then again, I think all the professionals have some amount of respect for patients who's bubbly and who will just sit there and talk and analyse themselves. ;)

If you don't talk about it much, it won't come up. But I strongly encourage you too, cause that's what they're for. But I understand. I haven't mustered the strength to speak of the cutting as well. Well, she knows but... I just can't talk about it.

I never stay with any professional for very long so I don't trust anyone. You don't have to be ready. You just have to be willing. Unless you're not ready to be willing haha. Then just say you want to talk about something else :) Good luck!

Love,
Faith and Trust

[Aubrie]

I agree with the letter. What I did was I just told myself I would count to 3 and spit it out. Once I said the first few words, it wasn't as scary.

Recovery sucks, to be honest. I'm not trying to discourage you, but just letting you know what you're in for. Remember it's different for everyone though. Recovering from SI was one of the hardest things I had to go through, but maybe that's because I did it alone (I had stopped seeing my therapist and my family wasn't supportive/encouraging). I had urges almost every day constantly. Yeah, I slipped up quite a few times, but it happens. After probably my millionth failed attempt at recovery, I just told myself I would take it day by day. It's not as bad when you're not thinking, "omg I can't go x amount of time without cutting." It's, "I can get through today. Everything will be okay." After the first 3-6 months, it wasn't so bad, and I'll have been cut-free for two years officially on November 10th.

You don't sound ready to bring your parents into it. It's not something we can tell you when. You have to decide when/if ever to bring them in.

If you have any questions/comments/whatever you want to talk about, feel free to comment/PM me. I also have my msn listed.

[secretly_secret]

I'm lost. What?