Can't go back...Muct go back....Can't...Must....

[secretly_secret]

I hurt so much. I used to hurt really bad. And I would cut myself. Now I am not cutting and feeling worse. I'm trying SO HARD not to go back. :blowup:

But I really am having a hard time holding it all in right now. Please help. :(

-Desperate......

[Stretch]

Harming yourself will NOT fix your problems, it will lead to more.

I think you need to take a trip to a local Youth Center or find someone to vent to. From what I know, people cut themselves because they cant handle everything bottled up on the inside. If that is the case with you, talk to someone.

I would suggest writting a letter, venting everything. Eveything you hate, everything that makes you cut yourself. Stick it in an envelope, along with a few objects such as a razor you might use, or a object that makes you angry, and sign it to nobody. Then write another letter, with everything you enjoy. Your favorite moments, activities and everything. Throw in some pictures, things that make you happy. Sign it to yourself, from 'Life'. Deposit into your mailbox, wait a few days, and you will recieve the envelope with happy things, and the bad one will be gone. Open it, and relive the thoughts, you have sent away the bad envelope.

I hope I help :)
Message me if you want to talk more.

[secretly_secret]

Can't message, I don't have enough posts.:(
So close to doing it....

[Stretch]

Can't message, I don't have enough posts.:(
So close to doing it....

Hmm, well whats on your mind? What is making you want to cut?

[secretly_secret]

Read "Tempted to cut." You'll find out.:(

[Stretch]

I think I can relate to your situation, that same has happened to me, and its frustrating isnt it?

However, cutting yourself is silly. Why put yourself through harm, when you are already sad, angry or however you are feeling. By cutting yourself, nothing will be solved. The only way to solve it is to talk to somebody. It could be your parents, your cousins, the mailman, your neighbor, anyone. There is always someone out there who will care, and who will listen, who will help. But by cutting yourself, you are not getting the help you need. I really think you need to check yourself into a Youth Center to talk to somebody.

[secretly_secret]

What is a Youth Center? Is it on this website?

[StoppingTime]

What is a Youth Center? Is it on this website?

It's not on the site here, no. I don't know what he is talking about either.

[Stretch]

What is a Youth Center? Is it on this website?

Well where I live, its pretty much a counsellor center, usually for teens. I am unsure if they have them everywhere, but where I live they have one.

[secretly_secret]

I am not going to a Youth Center. I figured out what it is. Thanks for the advice, but then Mom would find out.

[StoppingTime]

I would start out with a school counselor and see what happens from there, but it's jsut my opinion. Do whatever you feel comfortable with.

[Stretch]

I am not going to a Youth Center. I figured out what it is. Thanks for the advice, but then Mom would find out.

Would that be a bad thing?

If you think about it, maybe your Mom would get the hint? Maybe she will notice something is wrong and try to fix it.

Whatever choices you make, I wish you the best. Please, do not resort back to cutting.

[StoppingTime]

Would that be a bad thing?

If you think about it, maybe your Mom would get the hint? Maybe she will notice something is wrong and try to fix it.

Whatever choices you make, I wish you the best. Please, do not resort back to cutting.

I think the OP does not want her mother to know because of how she may feel towards her, but he's right, don't go back to cutting if you can help it.

[secretly_secret]

Would that be a bad thing?

If you think about it, maybe your Mom would get the hint? Maybe she will notice something is wrong and try to fix it.

Whatever choices you make, I wish you the best. Please, do not resort back to cutting.

I would start out with a school counselor and see what happens from there, but it's jsut my opinion. Do whatever you feel comfortable with.

Stretch: That would not work. I would just go and cut more.
StoppingTime: I'm homeschooled.

[StoppingTime]

Stretch: That would not work. I would just go and cut more.
StoppingTime: I'm homeschooled.


Do you have any good friends you can talk to?

[Stretch]

Stretch: That would not work. I would just go and cut more.
StoppingTime: I'm homeschooled.

I see, well have you thought about calling some sort of hotline? I know where I live there is a Teen Hotline.

[StoppingTime]

I see, well have you thought about calling some sort of hotline? I know where I live there is a Teen Hotline.

I think this is more useful than a hotline...

[secretly_secret]

I don't know. I just don't...Thinking about telling my crush. He will totally understand! But if his parents find out...I'm dead!

[StoppingTime]

I don't know. I just don't...Thinking about telling my crush. He will totally understand! But if his parents find out...I'm dead!

If he really is a friend to you, and you tell hime it is to remain private, and you really trust him, then try it!

[secretly_secret]

I trust him. He's the best guy I've ever known. Maybe I will, but I will think on it awhile first.

[StoppingTime]

I trust him. He's the best guy I've ever known. Maybe I will, but I will think on it awhile first.

Good idea. Stay on here and talk it out some more.

[secretly_secret]

Do you think I should tell him?

[StoppingTime]

Do you think I should tell him?

If you trust him, and you think he will be able to help/guide you, then yes.
Stress to him that it is between the two of you though.

I wish you the best!
Steve/StoppingTime

[secretly_secret]

I don't know...:confused:

[StoppingTime]

It is a hard decision, and it's completely up to you. How have you been feeling recently about the cousins?

[secretly_secret]

Ever since they got home, I haven't looked at them or said anything to them.

I don't know if they noticed.
I love the 17 year old. We are best friends. The only thing I haven't told Emma about it this.

The 22 year old, on the other hand, makes it obvious she doesn't want me around. The only reason I like having Caity here is because SHE CAN COOK!
She always shows me everything I do wrong. It's always,
"Don't be a crazy face, Hannah"
and
"Use proper logic Hannah"
and
"What do you mean you don't know what optimistic means?"

I'm just
so
sick
of
it!

[StoppingTime]

Ever since they got home, I haven't looked at them or said anything to them.

I don't know if they noticed.
I love the 17 year old. We are best friends. The only thing I haven't told Emma about it this.

The 22 year old, on the other hand, makes it obvious she doesn't want me around. The only reason I like having Caity here is because SHE CAN COOK!
She always shows me everything I do wrong. It's always,
"Don't be a crazy face, Hannah"
and
"Use proper logic Hannah"
and
"What do you mean you don't know what optimistic means?"

I'm just
so
sick
of
it!

It's good that you are in a nice relationship with one. You are right, I definitely wouldn't tell her about this though. she probably would get really upset about it if you guys are good friends, and you don't want to ruin a friendship. The second one just seems like she likes to bother and put other people down for the sake of doing it. Judging from those examples, she just seems to be annoying and rude, but without any meaning behind it. This doesn't change the fact she still does it though. Although, if the 17 year old asks you what's wrong, what would you feel comfortable saying, if anything?

[secretly_secret]

I would probably tell Emma the whole thing if she asked.

I love her, and she loves me. She might get upset, but we'd get over it.
Caity isn't a bully or anything. She just is a little over confident and speaks before she thinks.

I haven't told Emma because she would tell my mom.

I'm gonna go eat dinner, but I'll be back, hoping for an encouraging word. :)

[StoppingTime]

I would probably tell Emma the whole thing if she asked.

I love her, and she loves me. She might get upset, but we'd get over it.
Caity isn't a bully or anything. She just is a little over confident and speaks before she thinks.

I haven't told Emma because she would tell my mom.

I'm gonna go eat dinner, but I'll be back, hoping for an encouraging word. :)

Good Luck, its almost 10:00 here, so I may not be on until tomorrow when you read this. I realize she isn't a bully, just annoying and living on her high horse. Like you said, I would only tell Emma if she asked, and tell her it should remain between the two of you. She may try to help you by asking your mother to include you, and this is fine. I wouldn't feel bad about having her help you out. Do whatever you are comfortable with.

Again, I wish you good luck with everything :)
Remember you can post anything you want on my profile, I'm always here to listen.

~Steven

[secretly_secret]

just went through the worst dinner ever. I ate as fast as I could and left. I didn't say anything. Almost started crying twice. It just gets worse and worse....

Can't cut. Can't cut. Can't cut. Can't cut.

:(

[StoppingTime]

just went through the worst dinner ever. I ate as fast as I could and left. I didn't say anything. Almost started crying twice. It just gets worse and worse....

Can't cut. Can't cut. Can't cut. Can't cut.

:(

What happened?

[secretly_secret]

Nothing. That's what happened. I feel terrible that I haven't spoken to Emma for hours. I don't know what to do. I just got off the phone with my BFF. My conversation was so fake. She knows I used to cut. But I haven't told her about this...

[secretly_secret]

Are you gone Steven? :(