How to know

[Dean16]

The question is how to know if someone is gay. Cause I have a few friends and I have the felling that one if them is gay but I am not sure, I am only asking because I want to know I am not being judgmental. Like what traits or characteristics are there to look out for.

Thanks,

Dean

[Nicky97]

What is "gay"? Do you mean are they attracted mostly to same-sex? Impossible to tell. If you mean do they go out of the way to fit the stereotype, look for the usual behaviors. If you mean whether they would be willing to mess around with or you others, or enter into relationships, you might be able to get a clue if they want you to.

How do you tell if someone is left handed without catching them using their hands? You can't.

[acurasrock]

The only way to find out for certain, is to ASK them, straight up. If they are, and they want you to know, they will be honest and say "Yes, I am." There's no test you can use or way someones voice sounds, or tell tale signs that you can just know someones gay.

[HollisterrBboyy]

The only way to find out for certain, is to ASK them, straight up. If they are, and they want you to know, they will be honest and say "Yes, I am." There's no test you can use or way someones voice sounds, or tell tale signs that you can just know someones gay.

He hit it right here. Ever since I think the 6th grade, people have been asking me if i was gay, teasing me about it, making jokes, etc. In reality, im not gay. I'm preppy, kind of feminine, dont have a deep voice, play piano, dress well, etc. Obviously, this would give off the idea that "Hmm. That kid might be gay." Seeing this, don't assume he is because this makes the person feel even more insecure than they are. Take the time, establish you are NOT making fun of him, and ask him if he is. Don't talk crap behind his back, and if you want, you could even be his friend. Haha, hope this helps.

[Boxerbriefs96]

The only fool-proof way to find out is to ask. You can go about assuming all you want, but there are consequences for doing that. I mean what I say. After observing a guy, you may come to a conclusion that he is gay...ok so you "found out" and once you do, you might go around and about and tell everyone about your "discovery".

Now to the consequences: He may not be gay. If he is, he probably doesn’t want people to know about, not everyone. If you are his friend and he didn’t tell you, what makes you think that he want random people knowing.

Now I’m not saying that once you "find out" that you will go and tell the world, but people tend to do that. If it slips out to another friend in a conversation or a question, it can hurt.

So the best way is to ask. But make sure they are ready to tell. You don’t want to deal with the consequences. Neither does your friend.

[Giles]

You can't.

If he fits the gay stereotypes, all of them, then it's probably more likely than if he's the big macho guy that eats half a cow, lifts cars and has sex with every vagina he can see... but even then - stereotypes are stereotypes and therefore not always true or even remotely accurate.

[Unlucky_Leprechaun]

One on one question. Take him someplace you can be alone and just ask. Simple and to the point. Are you interested in him sexually? I would expect a why are you somewhere in there...just be prepared...

[Dean16]

No it's not that I am attracted to him or I want a relation ship or to spread rumors, it's that he has been acting stranger than normal around me and other guys.

[willrod]

I agree with everyone- talk to him one-on-one and explain to him that you think he might be gay. However, make sure that you let him know that you don't care if he's gay, and even then, depending on whether or not he's comfortable with himself, he might deny it. There's really no way to tell if someone's gay based on stereotypes- not everyone fits into stereotypes!

[just]

well, they actually look like one, its easy to tell if they are or not just watch their behavior . but you can ask them if they dont mind

[goug16]

I don't know but i'm in that situation too

[Trinity_15]

the only way to know is to ask