My parents and their ranting

[AlmostHomeless]

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[Dimitri]

I honstly think you should tell them, I think they need to know. They can help you. Don't automatically assume they will be mad. A lot of the time parents are helpful in this situation. Lemme know if you need anything.

[BrokenButterflies]

This is a hard question. I theory, you should tell them, but believe me, I know how hard that is. And your parents sound like they would be perticulerly difficult :-/
When you say "get around this", how do you mean? Like get around them finding out or get around them being mad at you?

[AlmostHomeless]

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[StrawberryCyanide]

I agree personally I think you should tell them. Of course it will be extremely hard and you should not expect it to be otherwise - but what with their attitudes towards self harm and suicide, perhaps knowing that these things are closer to home than they know will also help them open up their minds and stop being ignorant.

I would definatly not suggest avoiding the subject, you will have to tell them at some point, and yes they can help you, so try and do it sooner rather than putting it off.

Of course you should prepare yourself for their reactions, they WILL be upset and they probably will be angry at first. My parents were extremely hurt when I told them, and very angry with me. But that was 2 years ago, our relationship has improved and they thank me for letting them into my life.

So yeah I think you should tell them when you're ready, and if you really don't want to face them, try maybe writing a letter? Put it somewhere they will find it in the morning , go somewhere for a couple of hours so they can soak it up, then come back and talk about it. I found it was easier that way because you don't have to TELL them.

Either way I really hope you're getting better and I wish you all the luck in the world if you do decide to tell them, it's a choice only you can make :)

[AlmostHomeless]

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[Love.Hate]

Thanks. That helps a lot. I might try writing them a letter. I might try to figure out myself more before I do that though. They will probably have a lot of questions. I just don't want my dad to treat me like one of his patients.

Your parents will probably act a bit weird towards you at first, because they simply won't know how else to act. But trust me it's worth them knowing, I wrote a letter to my mum to tell her and found it so much easier than having to tell her face to face. Good luck, your making the right descision :)

[AlmostHomeless]

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[ReasonsForWeeping]

i think you should tell them i went thro the same thing when my family found out they wanted to help me maybe your family will be understanding (i hope this helped)

[xktx]

your 16 now, you can legally go to the doctors on your own and they cant tell your parents.... so try going to your doctor to get a reference to a counselor or someone. Try get better... if you need to tell them, tell them, theyre your parents they should be supportive and caring. xxx

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Actually, I think you should stay with a friend, tell them, and have your friend's parents talk to your parents. :) Good luck with whatever you do.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[Funkapotamus]

Tell the easiest going of the two when you two are alone. Telling them when they are relaxed and doing something casual like reading or something I believe is the best time to because they'll be able to think about what was said more clearly and slowly.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

I'm serious. I think my idea would work.

[Jupiter]

they really gotta find out. good luck, tell me how it works out :)

[AlmostHomeless]

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[Funkapotamus]

The thing with my parents is that once they make up their mind about something, it is extremely hard to change their view on something. I've had a hell of a time arguing with my mom about whether being gay was okay or not and she still hasn't changed. My main concern is that they will keep their current assumptions about things after I tell them. These assumptions include:
1. Computer usage made me this way (every time i say I have a headache she says that it's because i use the computer too much)

2. Me being atheist caused this (she is super christian and thinks I'm not old enough to decide what religion I am)

3. I'm messed up because she didn't buy me something I want

4. I don't appreciate life (she rants about starving children in africa every time she hears about suicide / depression)

I just can't imagine her changing her view on the relationship between cutting/depression and these things. She also has an aversion to conventional medicine. She thinks everything is psychological and you just have to have willpower to overcome it. She says that kids with ADHD don't really have anything wrong and that they dont need meds and that they just have to learn to concentrate on things. She says that kids with ADD just never learned to focus and just need to learn study skills. She compares this to her inability to understand english very well. She says that she overcomes it by reading things 10 times and that if she can overcome that then ADHD/ADD kids can overcome their problems without meds.

Considering these beliefs I have concluded that she is likely to assume that cutting/depression is simply something you simply overcome with willpower and she will likely try to pound into my brain "an appreciation for life" instead of sending me for proper help. She is very superstitious and believes in chinese herbs more than modern medicine.


Sorry for the long post, I got a lot on my mind right now.

Jeez sounds like my dad. Anyways what you could do is just seek some counselling on your own and get a perspective from a person in that field. I'm sure there are ones that don't cost anything. Or join a group that's got similar issues in your community. I think some backing from people in person could help, but that again is just my two cents.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Call a friend this Friday. Ask for a sleepover, have the friend pick you up. Explain everything to your friend and his parents. Start from there. :)
Good luck.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Call your friend up and say you really need to talk about them, and that it's a life and death matter, because it is! If they really care about you, they will come and pick you up. You can begin explaining once you're at your friends house.
I think this will work.

Keep us updated, we want to know what you're doing! :)

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

I don't think I'm brave enough to put my friends' parents through the trouble of having to drive for a couple hours to pick me up. I wish I had friends that lived closer.

UPDATE

Yeah so I heard my parents talking in the next room and they were ranting about people who cut. They were saying that people who cut don't really have problems. They said that it would be a waste to go to a psychiatrist because psychiatrists just push pills. In their own words "Psychiatrists just see patients for a few minutes then give them medicine." I can't stand hearing my parents talk like this.
Sorry, so sorry. :(

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

How about a school psychologist?

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

:( So sorry. Can you explain maybe to a nice teacher maybe?

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

I know. :(. Wish I could help. I have nothing else. :(

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdI13Ze8PzM
:)
Hope this song helps. Maybe you should do some extra studying if your parents are pushing you.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Got a hundred? :D I'm getting there. :offtopic:

:P

[snow661]

CALL A HOTLINE! They will tell you how to approach your parents with this. Do you have grandparents? Could you tell one of them then they mention it to your parents? Can they change their minds saying nothing is wrong with people that do these things and maybe say they know someone who does? I think this is your parents way of scaring you into admiting it. They could know and dont know how to aproach the problem. If they know, this could really be screwing them up so you need to get this done soon. I hope this helps! :) Please tell me when you let them know.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

I'm sorry, Stephen. (hugs)

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

You can wear a shirt over your chest. Plenty of boys I know do it.

(And I still think they're hot! :P)

YESS 100 POSTS YAAAYYY

:offtopic:

:P

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Oh c'mon. Can't you give it one try?

Oh and if you trust your cousin, you need to tell her.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Don't ask your mom. Just go their wearing a clean T shirt and your uniform, and then if your swim coach says otherwise, tell your aunt or cousin.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

:-/ okay. i guess that might work. i hate to say it though. is there no better solution?

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

I'm sorry. :( PM me.

[Jupiter]

I seriously think you need to talk to them about this.

[AlmostHomeless]

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[secretly_secret]

Tell someone. NOW. before it gets really bad.

[AlmostHomeless]

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