ugh.

[Aubrie]

So I'm writing this as a let it out sort of thing I guess. My boyfriend lets his friends on his msn account. I messaged him, and it ended up being his friend. Now, his friends are extremely mean to me, but they're like that to everyone except their little social circle. My boyfriend is the only exception to that. Anyway, his friend told me that my boyfriend was with another girl. This freaked me out and put me on edge. After about 20 minutes, he told me that my boyfriend was just at the store and to shut up because he'd be home any minute.

My boyfriend got home, and he wasn't with another girl, so that was okay. I stupidly made a status about how his friends are assholes. Immature, I know. He's pissed off at me now. I really just want to cut so bad. Rubber bands aren't causing enough pain. Ugh. I hate myself.

[AppealToReason]

Don't let his friend's immaturity or your boyfriend being upset make you cut, he'll get over it soon.
What does cutting even do? You get a brief moment of relief and then spend the rest of the time regretting cutting. It'll just add more stress on you right now. Listen to music, read a book, anything to take your mind off this.
You'll be ok, Aubrie.

[Aubrie]

Don't let his friend's immaturity make you cut. Don't let your boyfriend being upset at this moment make you cut either, he'll get over it soon.
What does cutting even do? You get a brief moment of relief and then spend the rest of the time regretting cutting. It'll just add more stress on you right now. Listen to music, read a book, anything to take your mind off this.
You'll be ok, Aubrie.

I'm not used to strong urges since I've gone so long without cutting. It's really overwhelming when I get them now. I think I'll be okay. But I'm just already stressed out (huge test tomorrow yaaayyy!).

Thank you. You made me feel a little better, though :)

[Amaryllis]

Tell your boyfriend.

He has a right to know the truth about his friends. See how he reacts, watch for body language, tone of voice, eye contact. These will all be signs as to wether he is lying or speaking the truth. It isn't hard to see if you know what to look for.

Kids will be kids, sweetheart. There is a 50/50 chance that you will not stay with him for the rest of your life. No one's worth cutting. Trust me, the last relationship I was in... Lets just say I cut a lot and my eating disorders became my friends. Now I wish I never did. He wasn't worth it. Nothing is worth the consequences of an eating disorder. No one.

[Aubrie]

Tell your boyfriend.

He has a right to know the truth about his friends. See how he reacts, watch for body language, tone of voice, eye contact. These will all be signs as to wether he is lying or speaking the truth. It isn't hard to see if you know what to look for.

Kids will be kids, sweetheart. There is a 50/50 chance that you will not stay with him for the rest of your life. No one's worth cutting. Trust me, the last relationship I was in... Lets just say I cut a lot and my eating disorders became my friends. Now I wish I never did. He wasn't worth it. Nothing is worth the consequences of an eating disorder. No one.

I did tell him. I believe him. His friends just don't like me (I don't know why; I never did anything to them), so they'll say anything to hurt me. I get so upset that my boyfriend gets pissed off enough to punch them until they stop (lol).

The thing that started the fight was that I believed his friend at first. I posted, "I'm not sure I love you anymore..." to my msn. His friend then admitted that he was lying, but I forgot to delete the post before my boyfriend saw it. Then I made a status saying that his friends were assholes. It was uncalled for, and my boyfriend got mad that I say stuff about his friends. (I do quite a bit, but only because they're sooo mean to me, and I want my boyfriend to make them stop.)

I just wanted to cut because I angered my boyfriend. Not to mention I thought he was cheating on me earlier in the week (I jumped to conclusions over nothing...), so yeah, this has been a bad week.

*sigh* I still kind of want to cut, but it's manageable now I think.