thoughts of suicide

[Φρανκομβριτ]

I have been having a lot of thoughts about suicide lately. Severe ones. If I'm on the tube platform, of course I think "I should jump", but I don't think much of it. I have literaly had to pull myself back form jumping into the road, or infront of a GO train. This is the second day I've had these/ I dont think I'll do it, but im scared I will. What do I do?

[<-Dying_to_Live->]

please dont do it, your my friend and i dont want to lose you :(

[-Silence]

Believe me, I understand.
I've stood at that ledge wishing I had the courage to end everything. My little brother was the only thing that gave me the strength to continue fighting. I couldn't leave him.

My advice though..obviously don't do it. Fight it as much as you can.

But, I also think you need to really look at your life. If you died, what would happen? Look at your family, your friends, how would they react? The thing I really think you should do is to find something, anything that means alot to you. And keep living simply because of it. Find a family member, a friend, a pet, an object, a goal in life..anything and hold onto it as tightly as you can. Don't ever let go.

If you feel it's helpless, that there's nothing out there..hold on to VT. I can tell you now, if you weren't here it would affect alot of us here, alot of people care for you here. Just look at Cosmos' post, alot of us feel the same way, I know I do.

Hang in there.
:hug:

[Φρανκομβριτ]

Thanks Heather! And Matt too. I want to do it so much, but yet, my brother aswell, keeps me alive. And the other people I love. But it's just so tempting.I was at thebway again today! I can't make it stop! I really aprciate everyones help, but I am so scared that one day, I'm not going to stop myself.

[cheese1234]

Think about the people that love you. Think what they will be missing. My best friend recently lost a friend because of suicide and it was a devastating time for him and me because I had to deal with him being sad. so it just doesnt hit home on your friends but friends of your friends. Trust me you DONT want to do it. If you need to talk thats what we are here for

[Φρανκομβριτ]

I know, and I think of my friends. But Im scared that one day I might forget about them, and then what am I going to do?

[TheWizard]

I tried to kill myself once. Three days later I wake up from a coma. Then I'm sent to a mental hospital and put on suicide watch. I got used to it. Then I met my doctor who didn't give up on me. Tests and more tests he found out I was a schioz.

The point is it cause more problems in the end. My mon was crushed. All we have is each other. My brothers and dad don't even want to see me. It embarrssing for them to be seen with a schizo.


All you can do is throw in the towel on your present life and create a totally new life. If you don't change then you can only espect to get the same results in the future.

First, you need a little extra help so tell your mon and dad you are suicidual and want to get help (as in seeing a head doctor). He will most likely put you on anti-depressants. Don't worry about cause I take them and they work great. I'm a totally living my new life and I'm happy again.

I made this web site so all the members could find advice and help from each other. I'm amazed that its working and its part of my new life.

Everyone here loves you so you have to find away to live another day. For me its my mom, VT, and art.

And people here have helped me so many times. Let them help you too.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

Thanks Josh, but I can't tell my parents. They don't, and wouldn't understand. My mum sees my other side. She think's I'm a totaly happy little kid. Even the mental breakdowns I've had haven't changed her mind. I'm hiding. I have no choice but to!

[cheese1234]

This site was an amazing idea and thank you for making us a part of your life. If you feel you cant express yourself in a certain way just try everything wethere it be playing music with your armpits or poetry just something to express yourself. VT may even help you . And if you worry that you may commit suicide not udner your own will you need to see a doctor to see how they can fix it. Anything can be fixed. remember that.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

IO CAN'T SEE A DOCTOR!! IT ISN'T AN OPTION! You don't know how my mum would react if she knew. I am always having to hide myself. I don't know how much longer I can take it

[<-Dying_to_Live->]

well if you have nothing to lose, why dont you just go ahead and tell someone?

[cheese1234]

dont hide it. DON'T you will feel much better if you tell your mom. you need to sit her down and talk to her. you may say, o thats easy for cheese to say but look if you do it there will be more of an open environment and you will feel much better about yourself because you can have help and there is hope. no more wanting to run off a cliff. think about it and one night sit your mom down and be honest.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

I can't. she doesnt get it. She said to me when I got suspended "i would have a problem with this if you were a depressed kid, coz thats not how you handle your problems". I cant tell her. I have to hold it in. As much as it kills me.

[Ravenous]

OMG! Rudi!! Where the hell did all this come from! What is it that makes you feel like that? Im so sorry man, i really do hope you can get over it.

[cheese1234]

alright no problem, but if yoo decide to talk to her, start from the beggining if you dont know were to start.

[Φρανκομβριτ]

Im a little better now. I haven't had thoughts since last night. I went on the tube and rode it till the very end, and just let everything out. I hope I'm alright now. Thanks to all of you guys so much for all your help and caring. I probably wouldn't have made it through this without you!

[cheese1234]

hey no problem anytime gat. we are always here for you

[<-Dying_to_Live->]

yes, we are all here to assist in any way possible