Advice on how i should proceed?

[zencoran]

First off, im new here! Hi everyone! Second off, lets get down to business... So im a sophomore in HS, and there is this girl that im interested in. I didnt know her before HS, but last year she added me on facebook (we didnt and still dont have any classes together) we never talked on fb, although she mightve liked a comment of mine, or i liked a comment of hers. Anyway, every day last year i would pass her in the smallest hallway of the school to get to a class that she had, the period before, and everyday she would say me name and hi to me. Now, im a bit shy in the hallways ( i hate being surrounded by mobs of people and im also focused on going to my class) so at first i was a little bit unresponsive, but after a while i would say hi back to her. This year, she does the same thing, i sometimes pass her without knowing in the hallway, and she stops, turns around and says my name and hi. On the open house day of school (when u get your locker and class schedules) i bumped in to her, and she said my name loudly, hugged me, and looked genuinly happy. her mom was there, and saw me for the first time. a week later i bumped into the girl again and we had some small talk, and she mentioned that her mom thinks i have beautiful eyes(she was like 10 ft away from me so it doesnt make sense) we still say hi everyonce in a while. Im a very jokester-type of guy, so in person, and on facebook, i always post some outrageous comments. Whenever i comment on a post of hers, she rarely replies, but likes it, while replying to anyone else. Also recently i was having a convo with a friend on his status(who also happens to be good friends with her) and she liked every single comment except for mine. Although im being paranoid, i still want anyone thoughts on all of this. i tend to overreact to alot of stuff, and im pretty sure i just rambled on in this post, so sorry if nobody wants to read the whole thing! Homecoming is coming up in about 4 weeks, so i was thinking of either asking her to homecoming, or asking her on a date in 2 weeks. I know she is single btw. Aside from that small convo we had, we havent really had a actual convo, so im looking for some oppurtunity to talk to her (maybe a fb chat) but once again i dont wanna be too paranoid. Any thoughts?

[cyb3rw01f]

i wouldnt ask her right away. Start talking to her more. Get to know eachother better in person. Hangout with eachother at the mall or something. Invite her other(but dont make a move) get close, then ask

[Jdima911]

im kinda in the EXACT same situation as you. talk to her more, and get to know each other. then when its time you should ask her out to dinner or to hangout or anyplace where you can get to know each other and the pull the trigger and ask her

[RobbieK1]

My friend met his gf bout the same time as u there going 3 years strong ask that girl out

[zencoran]

i think ill ask her to the mall this saturday, maybe some lunch and just walking around and talking.

[Dimitri]

i think ill ask her to the mall this saturday, maybe some lunch and just walking around and talking.
Do that, be nice to her and have anice time, laugh and if she happens to say no then ask her when it would be a better time to go out.

Don't be offended if she says no but rela and try seeign it from her point of view, you may be the first guy that she has liked in a while and is shocked by the idea that you have asked her.

While you are at lunch then you can her is she would like to go with you, I did this with my first date, I let her drag me into a dress shop and she asked me if I liked the dress and I told her that she would look better with a guy in a matching suit/tux and then I asked if she would like to go.

We ended up having a wonderful evening.

[zencoran]

Do that, be nice to her and have anice time, laugh and if she happens to say no then ask her when it would be a better time to go out.

Don't be offended if she says no but rela and try seeign it from her point of view, you may be the first guy that she has liked in a while and is shocked by the idea that you have asked her.

While you are at lunch then you can her is she would like to go with you, I did this with my first date, I let her drag me into a dress shop and she asked me if I liked the dress and I told her that she would look better with a guy in a matching suit/tux and then I asked if she would like to go.

We ended up having a wonderful evening. Actually she had a boyfriend last year, but yeah.... that sounds good! i havent dated in a while, so my skills are a bit rusty, *clears throat* I hope it goes well!

[Dimitri]

Good luck lil man.........

[zencoran]

So I haven't asked her because I can't seem to get her alone. I only see her 3-4 times a day and each time she is surrounded by friends. Should I just ask her online over Facebook to go to the mall??

[Nihilus]

Not over facebook!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's much better to ask her in person. It's much more meaningful if you ask her out in person and will hopefully flatter her more. Facebook isn't the way to do it. It's good for talking, BUT NOT asking someone out.

[LuckyLuke]

So I haven't asked her because I can't seem to get her alone. I only see her 3-4 times a day and each time she is surrounded by friends. Should I just ask her online over Facebook to go to the mall??

Simply go up to her group and say, "hey guys" then look at her and say, "Hi _____, can I talk to you for a minute?" and bring her away from them. Not only is that the only realistic way you're going to get her but it also demonstrates your level of confidence which is a huge thing for girls.

DO NOT ASK VIA TEXT. DO NOT ASK VIA FACEBOOK.

[zencoran]

kk hoping tomorrow is success day! Thanks for the replies

[Nihilus]

Good Luck :)!!!!!!!!!!

[zencoran]

Ironically I had to wait till the last day of the week to see her, and she was alone, so I asked her if she was going to homecoming, she said probs not, so I asked her what if someone asked her, she gave me a funny look, so I asked her to go with me, she said she would love to go with me, hugged me twice, and said she was supposed to babysit her bro, but that she would find out if she had to, and would message me on Facebook. is this a good sign??

[zencoran]

Anyone?

[Nihilus]

Yes it is. Congrats =].

[zencoran]

but it wasnt a yes :( its been like 3 days and no news..... on the off chance that she says no and that she has to babysit her bro, would it be pushing it if i said "ah how bout i make it up to you and we go to the mall(or the movies) on X day??"

[Nihilus]

Give her time, but if she says no, wait. It all depends on how she says no, but you could slip it in during a conversation.. Just give her time. Good luck. She is probably very happy that you asked so wait.

[zencoran]

ok! thanks. lookin forward for school tomorrow ;)

[BOSSPENGUIN]

yea you should ask her soon she sounds interested. just go up to her and say "hey ive known you for awhile and i think we should get to know each other better do you wanna go out sometime?" just wait the reply from there im sure she will say yes

[Kujiro]

What's life without alittle drama in romance.
If everything were to go smoothly, it would be just plain boring.

Back to the point, I would not conclude of she likes you or if she's shy, but it's definiate that she has told her mum something about you, else even when you did saw her mum at school, you would just be a face in the crowd, why in the world would her mum comment about your eyes.

Facebook is a very fetchy thing, and at most of times, people add but not converse.
You mentioned she liked some of your post but not commenting on it, it's a very common Facebook thing, when she comments on others is likely the person she is commenting to is someone relatively close to her in person.

From the way you placed it, it's a good idea to start a conversation on fb and getting to know her better thru these talks.
Slowly progressing to lunches at school.

Carefully observe her body language, her choice of words in some questions.
It's perfectly normal if she is to be evasive at first, but take it a step at a time.

With patience and preseverance, I'm sure the weeks till homecoming would be fruitful

Good luck
*smile*

[zencoran]

pretty sure i got rejected. no message in 4 days, passed her in school, i feel like im being ignored

[Kujiro]

Well thats where preseverance come to play, there are times where they simply dont know how to respond, and then to be avoiding the situation, give her some time and not be pushy.

Try to talk to her about it and apologise for being too rash in asking, try to get her comfortable with you first.

It may not always be ideal but most importantly you did give your best.

Cheers
*smile*

[Nihilus]

He pretty much said what it was going to say. ^

[zencoran]

well i talked to her. She seemed pretty nervous and dropped a few things, anyway she said she went last year and it wasnt fun so she prolly doesnt wanna go this year, then she mumbled something about her mom. Then she said if she changed her mind about going, she would tell me. So i said its ok i understand, and so she hugged me and i left.... feeling defeated.

[Kujiro]

well i talked to her. She seemed pretty nervous and dropped a few things, anyway she said she went last year and it wasnt fun so she prolly doesnt wanna go this year, then she mumbled something about her mom. Then she said if she changed her mind about going, she would tell me. So i said its ok i understand, and so she hugged me and i left.... feeling defeated.

I would not truely agree that you were defeated, at least she came through to you for certain reasons she was uncomfortable going for homecoming.
From what you went through, and to look at it in a the positive way, its potentially the building blocks of a budding friendship.

Having a mutual understanding of each other beats going to the party, and im sure it should definately not end there.
You may take on the approach slowly, from lunches and simple after dinner desserts.

Im sure it would work alot better than actually going for homecoming.

Good luck
*smile*

[Nat99]

Ask her out

[Nihilus]

Ask her out elsewhere. I doesn't have to be a school dance, but a restraunt or even something simple as a bike ride.

[zencoran]

Well good news i think! today is the day before homecoming, and she came up to me and told me that she decided to go, and she would meet me there. So i guess shes buying her own ticket, also its too late for me too order a corsage. Should i invite her to go to the restaurant that my friends and i were planning on going to??? And would it be weird if at homecoming i asked her to a date/or asked if she liked me?

[zencoran]

Wow. nevermind. I seriously think shes a bitch and not worth my time. I messaged her this morning asking her whats the details for homecoming, and she replies" oh im not going anymore" wtf????

[Efflorescence]

Wow......you've managed to confuse the hell out of me there....
First you say you like her and now, she's a bitch?

[Dack]

Dude, just lay off a bit, you're probably coming on too strong. Sounds like she's not fully sure of it just yet, give her time and -she- will come to you.

If you must think of her while you're waiting on her, try not to get courageous and say anything since girls are sensitive and you'd come off impatient and pushy, although it's sounds to me like she wants you to ask her somewhere else other than the dance.

[zencoran]

Ive never told her I liked her or anything, so its not like i'm coming on too much. And I said in my post I think she's a bitch for messing with me like this. I got really excited for nothing....

[ImCoolBeans]

Get to know her a bit, just be yourself and ask her

[zencoran]

im just pissed at the way she responded, she didnt say sorry i cant go, she just said "oh im not going :p like wtf?

[ImCoolBeans]

Hm, maybe she isn't really worth your time then

[dmeek7]

Girls are so confusing. You have truly no idea what she meant by it unless she tells you it.