Do I go after this girl or not?

[chillaxman]

Nevermind I gave up. :)

[dents]

dude, just become really close friends with her at first. Get to know her a lot better. Then once you are close, then take the oppourtunity to move it and ask her out. I've been in somewhat the same boat as you and my now ex-gf and I we were close friends before i asked her out, maybe about 3 months or so. If she says no, just keep being her friend. It would be less awkward that way.

[anonymous53]

Get to know her a little better. Just don't fall into the "Friend zone"

[chillaxman]

@Dents - I am definitely going to get to know her better, I'll ask the people on these forums when to actually make my move.

@sXe-Amo-X - How do I avoid being "Friend Zone'd?" Any steps that you would recommend?

[landone]

Become better friends with her first, then pursue it. Good luck!

[Kiss]

@sXe-Amo-X - How do I avoid being "Friend Zone'd?" Any steps that you would recommend?


Definitely flirt with her but don't come on too strong, if you want make sure she knows you like her. Sounds like she likes you too.

[chillaxman]

Update to the situation: Alright so we talked recently and we have a couple classes together and lunch together. She didn't respond with buckets of enthusiasm but it still went well. Should I ask her to hang out soon or wait? And I don't mean hang out as in go out.

@Kiss: Thanks for the advice, I haven't tried it yet, but I bet it works. :)

[LuckyLuke]

Okay, so this is my first post on these forms. Hi!

Some background info that may or may not be relevant to my small dilemma: I am a 14 year-old male Freshman and my close male friends have been in multiple relationships. None have gone on for a while except my best friend who just had his 9 month with his girlfriend. I've asked 3 girls out before, starting at the end of 6th grade. I've been given "no thanks, I don't want a boyfriend at the moment." "Maybe(then becoming a "no")", and "Sure!" The last one I didn't pursue because that same day I heard that she made out with one of my close friends almost right after she said sure. I didn't let her know I knew because that would cause more problems than I want, I'm not one to enjoy much drama. I have never had a girlfriend before, as you may imply, and I've never kissed a girl. I get nervous around girls, and that last girl I felt REALLY comfortable with, it almost "broke my heart" when I asked her, but she had a "history" of having unstable relationships (not that she's a bad person, but if you and her like each other and start a relationship, chances are that it's not going to be good for long. And we have always been close friends, even now.), so it didn't hit me as hard as my feelings would have liked it to. I was upset for a while, but I eventually got over it. Grudges aren't my forte, either. :P

Alright! On to the main story. School began for me on Tuesday. There I saw this one girl, who was beautiful beyond belief. Then again, me being a teenage boy with hormones raging everywhere, every pretty girl caught my eye. I saw her the next day, but it wasn't that important. Yesterday, I saw her again, most memorable time was at the end of the day. I was passing out papers and stuff, then she learned my name. (I was overjoyed, because she not only noticed me [I had bad times with girls at my old school, most just ignored me], but she commented on how she had to get a nickname for me and how nice I was, something my female friends took forever to notice about me(I'm not conceited in any way, but I am naturally really nice to people, it meant a lot to me how she noticed that early on.). She requested me on Facebook later, and we talked for a bit. She said okay to talking more and eating lunch together sometime. :D

Here's my problem: Should I ask this girl out or leave it be? I want a relationship with this girl really badly, but I don't want it to end badly or move too fast. I'm also worried if I would go too slow. I have no idea what to do. D: Please help?

Side note: The school does not have drama, well, little to none. I'm afraid if I ask her out and she says no it'll be awkward between us and there will be drama. =/

I will keep this thread updated with posts and this first post. If someone could help I'd really appreciate it. :)


I'm going to be blunt:

Ask her out or you may not have the chance.

She seems very interested in you and if you drag it along for too long a time, she'll get the impression you just want to be friends and that's what you'll remain- just friends. It's an awful feeling liking a girl so much but ending up in the friend zone; it's happened to me and certainly has taken its toll.

Go for it, the worst she can say is no.

Oh, and ask her out on a date. Something VERY simple. Having lunch together is a good start but it doesn't leave you two alone. Consider the park, mini golf, or bowling. Something that you two can do together that provides a little distraction.


Best wishes!

[chillaxman]

@LuckyLuke: Thanks for the advice, but I haven't really known her long enough to be comfortable with bluntly asking her out as soon as possible. As much as I'd like to, I don't think would end well. =/ I do appreciate the advice though. :)

Another update: Alright so when we have lunch together I barely see her. I normally stay with people I just had classes with, or anything/person I'd consider a friend. I don't know if searching the whole cafeteria looking for her is a good idea either. =/ And when I do see her, I freeze up and don't know what to say. Is there any way I can fix that?