alley
August 19th, 2011, 06:59 AM
So, my parents don't really care that i self harm, since I have told them on two seperate occasions, a year apart, and they have done nothing about it, and ignored it even though i was asking for help, which, is upsetting.
Yet, i've wanted my nose pierced for as long as i can remember, like since I was 11, and i have pleaded too get it done to them. And they say 'no, we're not letting you putting a permanent hole in your body which could result in a scar. that would be irresponsible of us, as your under 16.' Which is fair enough, i guess.
What i don't get is that everytime i self harm i add an extra scar. my arm is absolutely littered with scars, and they know that, cause they see it. yet they don't care. these scars are noticable, permanent, and i'm going have too live with them. And they have it in their power too help me stop, by support, or whatever, yet they chose not too. Does that make them irresponsible?
okay, so a nose piercing and self harm is two completely different things. But they could both end in permanent scars, and my parents reason for not allowing the nose piercing is because of the chance it may scar or go wrong, and cause me pain. Yet, they don't give a shit about the self harm, which is scarring me each day, and adding pain, emotional and physical.
So what i'm really getting at, is it makes me mad, i don't care if they can't accept that i self harm, i first told them a year ago, and again about a month ago. they've had fuck loads of time too adjust too it. don't they even care how i feel? i want help, they're my parents, they should support me, and get over their stupid insecurities. It's not like i've not waited. i've given them over a year too feel better about it. and the whole time i've kept telling myself they do care, they just can't accept their child selfharms, like for example people on here have told me when i've posted it before.
I can't deny it too myself any longer, they don't care. it's simple as that. Cause even if they couldn't accept it they should be mature and ride over that, not ignore it all. and it hurts so much.
don't know what im going too do anymore, my parents couldnt give a shit, my friends can't help, two of my closest ones are going through really tough times themselves, i cant add to their stress. the others think its no big deal and theres no need for me too stop, or are too immature too help me deal with it.
i dont have any teachers i feel close enough too, ive even tried childline but that was a fail, i couldnt get them too understand.
well sorry for the rant, but basically, i give up, looks like im going to be doing this forever. i've tried everything the last year and a half, too stop. it just isnt working. im so sick of this. sometimes i even feel suicidial, i just cant get out of this vicious circle. is there even any point with anything? life; we're born, we fuck up our selfs with mistakes, we die. why waste time inbetween. anyone else reached the complete end? cause i think i have.
Yet, i've wanted my nose pierced for as long as i can remember, like since I was 11, and i have pleaded too get it done to them. And they say 'no, we're not letting you putting a permanent hole in your body which could result in a scar. that would be irresponsible of us, as your under 16.' Which is fair enough, i guess.
What i don't get is that everytime i self harm i add an extra scar. my arm is absolutely littered with scars, and they know that, cause they see it. yet they don't care. these scars are noticable, permanent, and i'm going have too live with them. And they have it in their power too help me stop, by support, or whatever, yet they chose not too. Does that make them irresponsible?
okay, so a nose piercing and self harm is two completely different things. But they could both end in permanent scars, and my parents reason for not allowing the nose piercing is because of the chance it may scar or go wrong, and cause me pain. Yet, they don't give a shit about the self harm, which is scarring me each day, and adding pain, emotional and physical.
So what i'm really getting at, is it makes me mad, i don't care if they can't accept that i self harm, i first told them a year ago, and again about a month ago. they've had fuck loads of time too adjust too it. don't they even care how i feel? i want help, they're my parents, they should support me, and get over their stupid insecurities. It's not like i've not waited. i've given them over a year too feel better about it. and the whole time i've kept telling myself they do care, they just can't accept their child selfharms, like for example people on here have told me when i've posted it before.
I can't deny it too myself any longer, they don't care. it's simple as that. Cause even if they couldn't accept it they should be mature and ride over that, not ignore it all. and it hurts so much.
don't know what im going too do anymore, my parents couldnt give a shit, my friends can't help, two of my closest ones are going through really tough times themselves, i cant add to their stress. the others think its no big deal and theres no need for me too stop, or are too immature too help me deal with it.
i dont have any teachers i feel close enough too, ive even tried childline but that was a fail, i couldnt get them too understand.
well sorry for the rant, but basically, i give up, looks like im going to be doing this forever. i've tried everything the last year and a half, too stop. it just isnt working. im so sick of this. sometimes i even feel suicidial, i just cant get out of this vicious circle. is there even any point with anything? life; we're born, we fuck up our selfs with mistakes, we die. why waste time inbetween. anyone else reached the complete end? cause i think i have.