Growing Up

[Ambrosia]

I'm curious as to if I will get an answer out of this.

So I am officially 18 now. I am now supposed to grow up and get out of the house, which I will be doing slowly. Only, I'm scared of leaving my parents. It makes me feel bad to be away more than a night, even though we fight so heavily, and I feel bad letting them know I'm growing up. I'm supposed to be spending the night with my boyfriend tomorrow night and I'm afraid it will upset me since this is a big step in life (In my head it is). Any tips on how to get myself to stop feeling so attached and get moving with my life as a young adult...?

[judahtics]

you just have to do it! take the step and try it out. talk to your parents maybe? let them know it's because it's time for you to get out on your own. let them own you love them, respect them, and appreciate the last several years of care they've given you and ask them for any special advice they might have. when you involve your parents, and when they are involved, it seems more like everyone is calmer. maybe ask them about helping you with a budget and things of that nature.

[Kujiro]

It's a gradual process to grow up and part from your parents, to lead the young adult life.
You are now in the transition from being a dependent to an independent, as we are all unsure about leaving our current comfort zone.
Although there has been fights and squabbles but its all these little things which makes it a home and part if growing up.

I'm sure your parents have noticed you have grown and would actually be expecting this day to arrive.
I'm not too sure about the culture, but in Asia, it is pretty common to actually still be staying with your parents till you are officially married, and still live with them after.

Letting them know is rite of passage, and should be approached with confidence, assurance and respect.
Somehow I'd agree it could be filled with emotions but it's a pride of every parent to see their children finally growing and becoming parents in the future to come.

You can start to loosen the attachments by still going to your bf's place but coming home for dinner, gradually 2 to 3 times a week. Reducing it to once a week.
Regardless it s necessary to return home once every week, to maintain and strengthen those family bonds.
It's after all a family, and in a family no one gets left behind right?

Good luck
All the best in your growing transition
*Smile*

[collapsing_rain]

maybe quieting yourself down and thinking about your aspirations, your life in the next step would help you focus. remember that all babies are taken care fully, less dependent when they are 12, and eventually parents let go when their children are independent. it's part of life set out by god for.everyone to walk on. give yourself assurance that you can do it and.many other people are just like you in a confusion..

[Ambrosia]

Gracias to all.

[Kujiro]

Do keep us updated on the progress. :)

Good luck winter

[Dimitri]

Spend time with my people. My parents have been sending me to summer camps for years so I have no problem leaving. I think that with time being spent in other places you will learn some ways to deal with these thoughts. I am going through something similar to this because I am going to college later this month for the first time but I am commuting. If you have any questions please do not hesitate to ask.

[Ambrosia]

Yeah, I start college on the 29th. I hope to move out at some point but I'm afraid to! :P I feel like such a dork because of it, though. Everyone else wants so badly to get away from home where as I am just content being here. But at the same time, I want to leave and try it on my own. I was raised in a more close family so I guess that can explain a lot. But it's hard.