Parents invading all my privacy

[Cybercode]

WARNING: Everything in this post is 100% true. It has some very nasty stuff no parent should do to their kid. If you want to lock this go ahead, but I need help before I snap.

My parents are very strict, my dad likes to tease me and such by claiming I am a mistake. Somedays I feel like killing him, or myself or just running away. Well today is probably the worst thing ever.

Today my parents came in asking for them to see my phone and everything on it, my computer and all it's history, my Netflix dvd, and all my clothes off without covering my area. I refused to do any of those. I asked why, and my parents gave me the simple, "You don't need to know" answer. Well they did a thorough inspection of everything including my area. And then after that they said they have evidence that I masturbated last night ( in fact i did, but we just got home from a 3 day vacation in Jacksonville, and i wanted to relieve stress). But I'm a 16 year old male who still has to be watched when going to the bathroom. I've never done drugs or alcohal, I'm still a virgin, I've been single all my life, I do have a temper (I'm Italian-German) so I can get really mad really fast. So when they asked me to take all my clothes off I asked them why I couldn't have the smallest of privacy like my area, going to bathroom or masturbating. It's not like I'm doing anything to hurt myself which I'm not. But when they burst into my door unannounced to check every single inch of my room, I get really mad. And don't even give me that "Cause they love you" bullshit cause they don't, I'm a mistake, my dad wishes I never existed, and they just overall don't love me.

So my question is what should I do?

Should I betray them like they did to me and ruin the family by claiming child abuse?

Should I run away to find a better life?

I really really need help. Not just with this problem but psychologically. No kid of any age should have gone through what I've been through.

[Ambrosia]

This is believable, seeing as there are people out there who view masturbation and such as a sin against God (Or some other bad thing--). The fact is, they are pushing their beliefs a little too heavily onto their teenage son. This is not something you can simply make stop. I'm sure you have probably tried to talk to them about it, or yell at them about it, or something along those lines. It just doesn't seem to work out too well, does it?

You need to remind yourself that you will be 18 in two years and by age 17 you will be able to just move out. If you can hold on just that much longer you can be okay. Remember that this is just your parents views and beliefs and they do not understand they can't force them on you, no matter how old you are. You are your own person and they have no say in that after they cross that fine line of what they SHOULD get you to believe and what they want you to. It is not wrong or dirty for you to masturbate, but that is a belief by a lot of religious (and even nonreligious) people that we have to respect, no matter how hard it is to. Let them believe as they want but keep in your head YOUR ideas.

I looked up the Emancipation Law in Florida to see if you could leave on your own free will but, sadly, you have to have their signatures and permission to.

Running away shouldn't be the answer. Doing so only causes pain and suffering to yourself and all those around you because no one knows where you are, no one has any control over your safety, and anything could happen. http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=95110

If you think this is abuse, then do as you must. Try to throw at them all you have verbally, first, and tell them how you feel and how you want space. If all else fails, perhaps you will be old enough to leave soon.

Good luck.

[DerBear]

WARNING: Everything in this post is 100% true. It has some very nasty stuff no parent should do to their kid. If you want to lock this go ahead, but I need help before I snap.

My parents are very strict, my dad likes to tease me and such by claiming I am a mistake. Somedays I feel like killing him, or myself or just running away. Well today is probably the worst thing ever.

Today my parents came in asking for them to see my phone and everything on it, my computer and all it's history, my Netflix dvd, and all my clothes off without covering my area. I refused to do any of those. I asked why, and my parents gave me the simple, "You don't need to know" answer. Well they did a thorough inspection of everything including my area. And then after that they said they have evidence that I masturbated last night ( in fact i did, but we just got home from a 3 day vacation in Jacksonville, and i wanted to relieve stress). But I'm a 16 year old male who still has to be watched when going to the bathroom. I've never done drugs or alcohal, I'm still a virgin, I've been single all my life, I do have a temper (I'm Italian-German) so I can get really mad really fast. So when they asked me to take all my clothes off I asked them why I couldn't have the smallest of privacy like my area, going to bathroom or masturbating. It's not like I'm doing anything to hurt myself which I'm not. But when they burst into my door unannounced to check every single inch of my room, I get really mad. And don't even give me that "Cause they love you" bullshit cause they don't, I'm a mistake, my dad wishes I never existed, and they just overall don't love me.

So my question is what should I do?

Should I betray them like they did to me and ruin the family by claiming child abuse?

Should I run away to find a better life?

I really really need help. Not just with this problem but psychologically. No kid of any age should have gone through what I've been through.

Well first of all this is not child abuse as they have commited no crime what so ever.

I will agree with you that they are over the top with the invading privacy thing but again its not a crime

As you are 16 runnig away would do nothing as since you are 16 you are allowed to leave the home without your mum and dad permission

Efectvly you need to find a better plan as none of what you said above is really a crime over the top but not a crime

[steve14]

bro, thats really rough.. im sorry. my parents are very strict as well, but nothing like that... honestly, most things happen for a reason... if you are that uncomfortable, i think it would be absolutely fine to run away, however you should have a plan before you go. and a back up plan. if you think you can last until you go away to college, or move out i would say that would be the better decision.... how often do they do that?

[judahtics]

Well first of all this is not child abuse as they have commited no crime what so ever.

I will agree with you that they are over the top with the invading privacy thing but again its not a crime

As you are 16 runnig away would do nothing as since you are 16 you are allowed to leave the home without your mum and dad permission

Efectvly you need to find a better plan as none of what you said above is really a crime over the top but not a crime

his parents have no right touch his penis or testicles unless there is a problem and he seeks help for that problem from them. it's very important you are careful with that. i also agree though that no real crime or abuse has been committed.

[Perseus]

How the hell can they tell if you masturbated?

[Cybercode]

his parents have no right touch his penis or testicles unless there is a problem and he seeks help for that problem from them. it's very important you are careful with that. i also agree though that no real crime or abuse has been committed.

they didn't touch, but they wanted me totally naked for the "inspection"

[Spock]

my sisters bf's parents are the same way he turn 18 in a month then he is coming and most likely going to live with us because his parents are strict just wait till your 18 and then get outta there

[Contra]

I agree with Lexi, say all you have to say, your opinion on what they do, your desire of having your privacy anf your space. You're 16 and from what I can tell, I see you're a good kid because your parents don't let you do anything bad, so you can tell them that you never done anything wrong so they should trust you from now on.
I believe your father is worse than your mother from what you say, so I would try talking to her and appealing to her soft side, or to anyone else in your family so they can help you. Your situation is horrible and I am deeply sorry about it. I wish you the best.

[judahtics]

or, you can just be happy you have a roof over your head, food to eat, clothes to wear, and a warm place to sleep. having no privacy sucks, but it's better than several alternatives.

[DoctorWho]

Maybe you should get CPA involved

[Apollo.]

Try to reason with them, tell them that they are driving you away from them. If that doesn't work do what you have to do I don't think I could live tree if it was like that

[DerBear]

Maybe you should get CPA involved

CPA wont do anything at all.

As for one. They did not touch him naked

And 2 No real crime has been commited