Sigh.....My life gets stranger everyday

[Nathan13]

Ok so here is a little story

Im shy
Dont like getting embarresed
Not very independent
Never had a real Best friend
Immature

Ok so When i was 12 my first and only "Girlfriend" broke up with me and i was really sad(smashed my 32" tv and i dont have anger problems) so i decided to start playimng my xbox i got for my birthday and turns out i played it non-stop day after day, night after night till about 2 months ago becuase i moved and ive stopped playing it becuase its boring now and also i started playing at the last year of my primary school(the school before high school 7 years long)right up til 3 years into high school(out of 6) so thats when my real immaturity started becuase i feel like i have missed out on my important school years where i would be quiet in school and then stay in and play xbox now i wanna go back to primary 7 and have a best friend and friends and then i woulkdnt be immature id be normal and the girl i like would be my age.

So basicly my questions:

1. Is that the reason i feel this way?

2.I dont show emotion alot as in today i was on a swing and i fell into a metal fence and there was a lump and i didnt cry or even show pain but after this constant feeling for this girl who is 11 and the wish to be 12 agian and restart the last 2 years of my life my my shyness the way it is right noiw or better and becuase im so sad i am actually about to cry and i need a new ipod now :| So is there a way to help these feelings?

3.What can i do when everyday i cant last one day without getting annoyed by family or school friends and others and since i bottle up my emotions until night time where i actually cry that my life is wrecked :| ?

Please help im so angry

Additional Details:

I also cant take it how when im with school "friends" and the reason they have " " around them is becuase of what i cant take which is:
my "friends" in school are only friends becuse i dont want to be lonely and made fun of in school i only have one true frinmd who gets this sort of "abuse" wich is everyone in one day at least paicks on my size, immaturity, shyness ect and they might "hit" me which isnt sore just annoying daily and its not bullying becuase its not like the american shows that doesnt happen but i also get annoyed when school friends say "hey alien" becuase im shy and dont speak and it just makes me wanna scream

[Solvez18]

ohhhhh, wish i could help. um, all i can say is. talk to a counciler or something

[Skyhawk]

I think a therapist would be helpful for you. :)

Also, I dont see why you say you are immature just because you played video games a lot. Maturity has little to do with that, I spent my younger years in front of the TV as well, and here I am "normal".

Just because you may be quiet doesn't make you different, there technically is not such thing as a normal person, because everybody is different.

Maybe social ethics are different in Scotland than over here in the States, but shyness means little here.

A councilor would help.

[Nathan13]

I dont think its that bad though. thanks

[shizzler6]

To me you need to find who you are. This probably will be ridiculous, but you need to find your interests, if you are interested in the arts or theater, get involved! Find a club in your school you like. Find someone who likes the same music!

It's easiest to find friends based on mutual interests. If you immerse yourself in things you like than people who like the same things won't care about who you were in the past

If you are lost and alone or you are sinking like a stone, carry on! May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground and carry on

[Nathan13]

To me you need to find who you are. This probably will be ridiculous, but you need to find your interests, if you are interested in the arts or theater, get involved! Find a club in your school you like. Find someone who likes the same music!

It's easiest to find friends based on mutual interests. If you immerse yourself in things you like than people who like the same things won't care about who you were in the past

If you are lost and alone or you are sinking like a stone, carry on! May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground and carry on

Yeah but my interests are 12 year old things and when i do stuff like that people annoy me about it

[shizzler6]

Ok. You say that you as a person have not evolved since when you were 12. You used games as and example. Then you also said you were getting bored of games.

If that's true then your personality is changing but your depression is halting it in it's tracks. Your games were a crutch for you and it obviously isn't working anymore. Now, if you want to change you need to look into yourself.

When you go to school, who do you admire? Figure out who you want to be now and be that person, even if you need to do something you wouldn't normally do, change your image, stuff like that You will be happier with yourself. And show your classmates you aren't and never were an "alien"

If im on chat come and talk to me!

[bigdaddy101]

I'm kinda like you I can't find anything I like to do, my dad is a complete dick(I don't live with him!) I seem to be stuck on videogames I have only 1 true friend I got screwed with last year during school(not exactly bullying.) Therapists don't help they just annoy the living HELL out of you! They are a waste of time! I've been depressed too! By the way there are no specific 12 year old things! Be who you want, but don't be me, I'm a sad, pathetic, chubby, lonely, loser

[Nathan13]

I'm kinda like you I can't find anything I like to do, my dad is a complete dick(I don't live with him!) I seem to be stuck on videogames I have only 1 true friend I got screwed with last year during school(not exactly bullying.) Therapists don't help they just annoy the living HELL out of you! They are a waste of time! I've been depressed too! By the way there are no specific 12 year old things! Be who you want, but don't be me, I'm a sad, pathetic, chubby, lonely, loser

Well im actally happy with my new younger friends and i kinda wanna push my other school "friends out of my life becuase if you live in glasgow you will know what i mean by this: most of my "friends" are neds or half-neds and i dont like being around them with the occational "joke" about me and stuff but.

and to the person above im very shy and every time i say something since im not as shy as whemn they met me 4 or more years ago i get "oh cool say another word" ect and its annoying.

Now i have a problem:

Im really close with my lil girl cuz who is 11 and we kinda fell out since she gets moany easily and then her best friends little bro's best friend plays a game i like and also goes on this site which is a bit like Habbo Hotel and you get best friends on it so i asked him to be my best friend on it and he accepted becuase we are good online friends though we have never met and then i added him on facebook and then i asked if he wants to meet up and play the game together or/and go out and play and he is 9 and im 14 so my cousin said: What are you doing trying to be best friends with an 8 year old? Sad..." and i just said no and sora moan-walked away angrily and yes i said moan not moon.

So im not trying to get him to be my best friend but i want him to be a good real life friend.....is that ok?