Jealous

[XxMurderedKissesxX]

I see my nephew and nieces sit there with their father,doing one on one things,I see family pictures with all smiles,I see happy glowing looks on their faces. And im jealous. I mean,im glad my brothers a good father and is there for his children,but...I wish I could have that,I wish my dad wasnt a sick abusive bastard,I wish I had a gift to give someone on fathers day,someone who would walk me down the aisle...Someone who wouldnt pin me to the wall and scream death threats in my face everytime I fooled myself into thinking he changed. I feel ashamed im jealous,but...I cant help it....

[sydneyboy16]

Hey. Sorry to hear about Ur father :( I'm sort of in the same case - and I mean, I know what you mean when h look at re smiling faces of happy families- I dunno bout u but I guess it can sometimes even be depressing, much less than embarrassing. I don't get along with my parents, but I alsO get along heeps well with adults. I even do sports twice a week in an adults teakeondow class - an through this i now have like, 4 mothers :) so maybe.u should try and do some things with adults if u dont already Cus they can sure make you feel better.... Anyway, hope this helps :S

- XAV FROM SYD

[kai99]

The pictures that you see, is how you wanted your family to be. Imagine that someday when you get married and have kids, you can make that dream of ours become true.
Be strong :)

[CryWolf]

You know I can relate with this to some degree. My dad left 5 years ago when I was 10. I haven't seen him since. My mom blames me for him leaving so in a way I lost both parents at the same time. I feel that jealousy sometimes when I see other families and how happy they are. It's a lousy feeling because it's not cool to view happiness that way. Something that helps me in those moments is to think about how I feel or have felt and then ask myself "would I wish that on anybody?" The answer is always no and that seems to help me get through it and be glad for those who have something better. In a way it helps me share in their joy. I hope this helps :)

[Kujiro]

I am sorry that you have such an abusive dad.
I believe that his abusive nature could be a result of some forms of stress and other issues which resulted in such.
It is absolutely unfair if he treated you in that manner,
But setting it aside, if it seems too huge a barrier to dissolve such aggressiveness, i would seek a place of solace.

Sometimes trying to understand and being in his position does help to understand why is he like that.
Maybe he just does not know how to express love correctly?

It is normal to be jealous over happily bonded families, but we all have to agree life is never fair, and the strange turns that life throws at us, makes us stronger. Teaches us control and patience.
At least it teaches us not to do that to our own children in the future.
Chill , if you need a shoulder, i am here.

*smiles*
Good luck