general thoughts of how i am feeling

[unnamed]

first of all english is not my first language. move the thread if needed. all advise, help, comments, etc will be appreciated.

well it just feels so weird putting this into words. much easier when just thinking it by myself. this is what is going on. im 17 and going to college studying something i really like. having some kind of family problems (not serious though, dont think this is the reason of why this is happening). thats about me. im on vacations now so i have a lot of time to hang out with friends, go to party, have some drinks, meet new people. regular stuff that i couldnt do so often because i was studying hard.

this isnt the first time this is happening to me. ive lately been thinking and i just noticed that im like going through life without actually living it. i dont expect you to understand me completely. its like if i was just sedated or something and i am just doing stuff without putting any interest on wht i do. ive lost interest in doing some stuff. i dont feel that what i am doing actually would mean something. its like a permanent feeling of numbness but in a general sense. its so strange. life is more of like a routine. i dont feel im ennjoying life as i should. for example when my uncle or someone tells me what they were doing at my age i feel that i havent seized it. i think that part of this is caused because im not a very impulsive person in general and i tend to overthink everything i do. i do have fun and stuff but i feel that doesnt satisfies me. i have so much stuff on my mind to put in here but i kinda summarized. i would talk to my best friends but they are on family trips or stuff like that. i needed to get this off my mind.

well what i wanted to know is if anyone has ever went through this or anything like this. if anyone would give me an advice or a simple comment that would really help.

[Iris]

I sort of know how you feel. Everyone tells me to be happy, that the teen years will be the best of my life, that I'm going to miss high school when I graduate, that I should be enjoying this stage between being a child and being an adult. I can't, because I'm depressed, self-harming, and suicidal, but they don't know that. You don't seem to have those problems so there's less holding you back from living your life to the fullest.

You could try writing a bucket list (things to do before you die) and start going through them all. Or you could join groups and organizations that are truly changing the world, or are fighting for something you really care about. Helping others is very fulfilling. Also now that you're in college you have a lot more freedom-take advantage of that! Try new things, new experiences, take up another hobby, do something fearless and crazy. Take a risk. Do something you're scared of, like skydiving.

Finally, try not to feel like you need to live up to the level of excitement your uncle or whoever has had. They lived in a different time, a different generation. It's not a standard you should try to reach. FIgure out what's your standard of fun and excitement, a strive towards that.

[unnamed]

than you for answer. i am having the same problem as you. if you feel that way go talk to a friend. when i had some issues in the past, i always talked about it with a good friend. ive been through that stage in high school. you really should enjoy it, it just happened so fast that i wish it would have never ended. leave you with a quote a friend told me once (found it today on the internet too because i didnt remember it well) that may help you with your problems.
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.Dream. Discover."


i actually did thought about making a list of stuff to do, like a bucket list. that would actually be exciting. but i actually think i need something else. im seriously considering entering an NGO or something like that. a friend of mine alaways talked to me about how he went every week to do some charity work and stuff like that. i am also thinking now that some of the things that made me feel this way was that what i do actually has no major effect on the people around me. my life has no major impact on anything, its like a weird feeling that i will just be another person in the world, with nothing different or anything from the others.

[Iris]

Most of my problems are things no one, not even my best friend or even my psychologist could understand, so I don't bother much with talking. And my high school is very different than wherever you went, trust me. It's a nightmare. But thanks anyway for the advice.

You know, you can do more than one thing. Like make a bucket list and something else, and just go with whichever you feel like doing. There are no rules in a situation like this, just do what you think is right, and what will satisfy you the most. I think charity work is a great idea. It's the greatest feeling. I volunteer at a soup kitchen once a week and it's really really fulfilling. The idea that you impacted someone's life, you made the world a better place, you helped someone is very comforting, especially when you're worried about leaving an impact on the world.

You're the only one who controls what kind of effect you're going to have on the world. The way to not just be another person in the world is to distinguish yourself by leaving a lasting effect on it. Another idea is to develop you're individuality. Pick out the little quirks about yourself and realize that there is not a single other person in the world that's exactly like you because of these quirks. And maybe you'll find some hidden talent, when you reflect on these things, that you can try developing.