the funny thing...

[rukia_yua]

i dont undrstand everything....mainly because i'm not too brilliant, but i know what rape is....and i kow that it's wrong. my question is that, what if it's a family member? for example, a dad....or...cousin...or uncle or anyone...you're supposed to love them, right. i mean i kow what's wrong, but i also know that my dad terrifies me enough that i refuse to do anything about it. he's very strict and incredibly intimidating. but i dont undrstand why it hapened.
i was like 7 the first time andhe told me that i had to be punished for some childish thing that i had done earlier that day...i appolagized and sttod for a spanking (as routine) but was very surprised that he pulled my pants down...........it was awkward but at this point (once again at the age of 7) i was naive. but when he started saying things, and doing things....
my problem is that i'm torn between he's family and that he's wrong because i guess the little kid in me still sees her dad as a super hero....but i dunno. does anyone else have a similar problem??

[SOTRainbow]

That could be seen as rape, depends on what he did to you, if he only pulled your pants down and nothing else (I hope so) then it more likely isn't a rape, he probably was joking who knows? Though, if he did it several times then that could be an abuse.

[rukia_yua]

no.....there was more, most definately...but i really dont like telling people....like the whole word (it's embarassing) but....i dunno it just gets confusing

[XxMurderedKissesxX]

My father used to creep up on me while I was pretending to be sleeping ( My parents just split,any other time I would sleep with my mom bc I knew he would do this if i was alone ) and start to touch/rape me. At one point I let out a scream,so he knew I was actually awake,and he told me that it was my fault they broke up,and no one loved me,but him. I was torn because everyone I considered family was on his side,so I could either tell and be told I was lying like he said would happen,or be quiet,so I was quiet,he was daddy,the protector,the person u run to if u think theres a monster in the closet,u dont think for a second,he is the monster. And when his nasty secret got out,he made me promise not to tell,and if the questions persisted,to blame it on my new step father. Which of course,caused alot of problems. My family has always been fucked up,so nothing would be done,if I ended up telling them now anyway,idunno the situation for u,but things like this can really eat at u,maybe it would be best if u told someone. I know how hard it is when its supposed to be someone u love,trust and protect,but that was broken the minute he walked up to u and did that.

[rukia_yua]

it's so confusing :(

[flumeendeavors]

I know it's confusing hun. But it's considered child sexual abuse or molestation if it happens by a family member repeatedly. Your daddy is no longer the superhero. I know how hard it is to tell. I had to tell after a while because it got bad but it helped me a lot in the long run because i am happier now than ever because i am not being forced to stay quiet while some old man is raping me. Tell someone because although you love him and care about him, he is not the man you used to think he was. He is a monster and knows what he is doing is wrong, which is why he is telling you not to say anything. He knows its illegal and the person who raped me is now in prison. He's never getting out and that means that he cant hurt me even though i told. You will be OK. Im here if you need me. Its not right and he cant hurt you if you tell the right person because he will be done before he even gets the thought into his head. Tell please. I know its hard but you need to do it. I love you and im here. Dont forget it.

[rukia_yua]

it just hurts so badly

[rukia_yua]

i dontundrestand it though...he jst keeps sayingit's his form ofpunishment...he has that right....im so confused

[rukia_yua]

so just spent all weekend with dad...it wasnt as good as i thought i dunno howto fx all of this with iout any police i just do t understand

[Aubrie]

It's not punishment. He's saying that so you'll keep quiet. A parent has no right to sexually abuse you as punishment. Punishment is grounding, spanking, loss of privileges, etc. I know you're confused and hurt, but it needs to stop. This isn't what you want to hear, but it most likely won't stop until the police are involved. Yes, it will be embarrassing and tough, but do you really want to keep living this life? Life doesn't have to be this way. There is hope and healing, but you have to take the first steps, which is telling someone. People who hurt children are monsters. Monsters belong in jail.

[The_Narwhal]

It's not punishment. He's saying that so you'll keep quiet. A parent has no right to sexually abuse you as punishment. Punishment is grounding, spanking, loss of privileges, etc. I know you're confused and hurt, but it needs to stop. This isn't what you want to hear, but it most likely won't stop until the police are involved. Yes, it will be embarrassing and tough, but do you really want to keep living this life? Life doesn't have to be this way. There is hope and healing, but you have to take the first steps, which is telling someone. People who hurt children are monsters. Monsters belong in jail.

I agree with Aubrie. You have to tell someone. This man has no right to abuse you. This is not punishment, this is sexual abuse. Please you have to tell the police. If you dont it may just carry on and may even get worse. You have to inform somebody.

[RakshaMalayka]

Please tell someone. You dont want to regret having not told anyone about the abuse, and hes got no right. That is not a form of punishment. Trust me when i say youll regret it way more if you dont tell

[lionelmessi]

That could be seen as rape, depends on what he did to you, if he only pulled your pants down and nothing else (I hope so) then it more likely isn't a rape, he probably was joking who knows? Though, if he did it several times then that could be an abuse.

yes, I truly agree with you. It is the funny thing. laughed a lot....

[dannilove]

So is there sumone U can talk to first without going to the police? I mean like an adult who is chill and wont trip when you tell them? Why cant your mom do sumthing tho ?

[rukia_yua]

well i used to talk to people through PM's but i had to change my account bc it got hacked and i don't have anyone to support me...this is the only place that i can seem to find solidity in anyhting. i dunno...i wish i could tell the police, hec i barely (and blindly) posted this....but i need to talk to someone before i make any final decisions..it's harder than i ever expected...it's just not fair, i'm beginning to realize that he's taken way more than what ill ever be able to get back and honestly, i just sit in my room and cry...which i know is pathetic.
so tell me this, if i'm understanding now that it's bad, when he's gone and i no longer have a daddy....tell me, what am i to do? how should i react???

[dannilove]

well ummm honestly you never had a daddy....what he does is not what any dad that i know would do. he is just a man that uses and abuses you and doesnt care for you.....you aren't gonna miss anything by leaving him realle. you shuld just tell your mom what you are feeling and she needs to help you or get out of your way.

[rukia_yua]

mom ignores everything that he does. she's terrified of him but she keeps saying that she's sooooooooooooooooooooooo in love with him. currently we (me and mamma) are out of a home because of him and.....it scares me. every little girl needs her daddy, you know. i just wish he'd be more of a daddy :(

[dannilove]

so dose she know that he is using you for sex? who knoes about your daddy ? you should tell your mum wat is going on and that your daddy is using you for sex.

[rukia_yua]

i just got back from his house this weekend and i come back with a black eye and a busted lip...i'm contacting police tonight....wish me good luck, while in the mean while, i'm cutting again and im unsure why. :/

[Thebrat217]

Ive gone through the same thing it happen when i was six and it was with my dads friend i was nieve and told right away. Then it happened again but i was older and was with my uncle and i didnt tell cause i was scared it went on for five years i just resently told. I had nothing to fear

[rukia_yua]

But it's not like that. I'm scared of everything

[rukia_yua]

Nobody has really.....I dunno. I just don't know how to change because I had done wrong....but then there were the camps.... How do I explain those without sounding stupid??,,, I dunno

[Demetri08]

How did contacting the police go? I know every girl needs her daddy, but at this point he's just an abuser. You don't like what he's doing to you and apparently your mom won't listen, so the next best thing to do is tell the authorities.

[rukia_yua]

They said "it'll be under investigation....we thank you for your concern" so nothing will happen

[rukia_yua]

I love the irony of the police "helping" while they sit in their chairs and eat their donuts