My girlfriend and Self harming

[Red the Viking]

Ive been going out with this girl for 9 months now, and we both love each other very much. :) But every now and then she cuts , i hate it so much , not the fact that she self harms but the fact that shes hurting herself and it hurts me to see her hurt. corny , but true, i hate seeing her in pain.

i want to help her stop, she doesnt do it often , maybe 3 times in the whole relationship. but it affects her deeply. she says she cuts "Because i was punishing myself for being an idiot and i did it because i missed people and i wanted to feel something".
ive cut before and i only do it towards anger at myself. so i find it hard to relate to why shes cutting , im not that kind of emotional. i find it hard to console her about lost ones and i dont "feel" anything when i cut apart from pain.

i just wish shed stop, i love her to bits.
i really dont know what the above paragraphs accomplished. but i hope someone got something out of it. :)
i just dont know what to do.
thanks in advance

[Njathind]

All you can do really is sit down with her, and let her know how you feel about her cutting. Just let her know that you dont judge her and you understand her. Let her know your there for her, and want to help her when she's down.

Maybe get her to call you when she's down instead of her cutting herself?

[DJZS]

Do you still cut?

[Amaryllis]

The fact that she has someone who loves her and cares is great. Tell her you love her, that she deserves more than what she's doing to herself. That when she hurts, so do you and she doesn't want to hurt you, does she? Tell her she can talk to you. Instead of hurting herself, she could just talk to you about the pain she's feeling. Tell her you're there for her. That if she needs you, that if she's crying for help, all she has to do is cry for you, she doesn't have to write the pain on her body.

She's a lucky girl to have you and you're amazing to be trying so hard to help. I really hope you two will be happy. Hold on there. Good luck :)

And feel free to PM me, leave a comment, message, anything, she can too if she ever needs a friend and give her a big, big hug for me. And a hug for you too. I hope you'll both get through this.

And you don't deserve the pain you're inflicting on yourself either. Set a good example. When you're angry, scream, cry, it's okay to break down but don't hurt yourself. It hurts her too. And nothing good comes of it. Be strong.

Faith And Trust

[Love.Hate]

People cut for all sorts of reasons, but the fact you did it means you understand that its her way of coping sometimes. So she needs to find new ways to cope, there are loads of distractions out there. Find something that works for her, also i would sit her down and talk to her. Tell her how much you love her, and it hurts to see her hurt. That you want to be there for her but dont quite know what to do.

Tell her you will always be there, so if she feels like hurting herself then she can contact you first and you can try to talk her out of it :hug:

[XxMurderedKissesxX]

All u can do is be there for her. Comfort her,tell her u love her. If u still cut,maybe try to stop,so u can better support her,and maybe even help her stop too. Just shower her with affection,something u could do,is ask her to call,text or meet up with u whenever she gets the urge to cut. My bf used to do that with me,and knowing there was someone who loved me,trying to help,and there to comfort me,sometimes,turned me away from self harming.

[Red the Viking]

i still cut sometimes , when i get angry.
i wish i could sit down and talk with her , about her feelings and be all emotional. i just dont show emotion that way. i dont cry or get sad, i tend to show only my happiness with bursts of anger. i know its bad to bottle emotions like that , but thats just me.
she knows it hurts me when she cuts and she hates that. that just makes it worse , because then she thinks shes stuffed up. i wish i was all mushy and emotional to be able to talk to her and help.

[Love.Hate]

You could try? Ask her how she feels, why she feels like that? Ask her if she wants to get better. I think if you want her to stop, and you continue to cut then its not giving her anyone to look up to. I think she needs to know that its is possible to recover from this. Just because your not all "mushy and emotional" doesnt mean you cant relate to her. Its how she copes.