Making friends with strangers?

[CarolinaDude]

How do certain people go about making friends with a stranger, or at least someone they don't know well? Like, how do you "mingle" with someone you've seen a couple times before but never talked too?

Whenever I make friends, I always have some kind of wingman of sorts (one friend who introduces me to his/her friends), or I join a club/sports team and you just kinda talk bout what you're doing.

My cousin, on the other hand, can just talk to any random person and they suddenly like him. How do you explain this?

[Carly99]

I never have a problem. I just smile and say hi and they always do the rest.

[Ambrosia]

Funny thing. I was out to lunch with my boyfriends mother yesterday at the local Olive Garden. I have this problem with not being able to stop smiling at people. I smile at someone if they look at me, or walk into a room. It comes with the territory of working in the public eye. An older woman was sitting across from us and we exchanged glances (Rolling our eyes over how LOUD the children behind us were). The glances turned to smiles, and at some point during the lunch we exchanged words. We spoke for a moment or two before the conversation ended. When she got up to leave, she came to my table and we talked for a few minutes like we were old friends. I am a teenager, and most older people avoid conversation with teenagers. But we talked like normal friends and exchanged nice to meet yous when she was about to walk away. After she was gone, my boyfriends mother stared at me dumbfoundedly, asking how I can just talk to complete strangers like that.

It's VERY easy, no matter how shy you are. You simply have to smile, and be friendly! Once you're older, if you work in food service or in the public eye, you'll be quick to learn it. But some people are just unable to do it.

[alley]

It's all down too personality I guess. Depends how confident you are around new people, how able you are too act normal and friendly, regardless of only knowing them a short amount of time.

[Drew7]

I understand what you're going through. I have a few friends that are shy and they'll ask me to tag along because they say I fill the gaps. Particularly when they are interested in a girl, but what happens is they connect with me because they get to know me. Here is what I tell them.

Don't view it as a problem. Or more specifically don't view shyness as a problem. We really are all different. If everyone talked as much as the talkers ... well, it's be a mess. Instead, pick your moments and chime in when you can.

If you're by yourself, it's tougher. Sometimes people just want to be left alone, OR they too are shy and waiting for someone to approach them. It also depends on where you are. If at school, then you have a whole bunch in common. If you're at a tennis club, clearly you know about tennis, so talk about that. == It wouldn't be random to approach anyone on at a tennis club to comment and then talk about tennis and then other subjects. Do the same at a grocery store and they will think you're nuts.

Something I have that my shy friends don't have is that I read a lot. I read about local, national and international events every day that I'm not in school and I do it as a distraction from homework when I'm sick of it. My buddies make fun of me for doing it, but I like knowing what's going on or sometimes I just check out something that interests me on Wiki. Over time, I've learned some about a bunch of different things so usually someone mentions something that I know something about or I can mention something that everyone knows about, like the caylee mom trial.

Plus it will never hurt you to know whats going on in your school district, city state etc.

Oh, and yup, part of me is pretty geeky according to my friends, but I'm okay with it an d so are they. IDK, I like knowin stuff and use that to be more social

[davisbr2]

be careful u never know when you will be strapped face down with no pants on and a gag in your mouth