The Prodigy's problem

[phish]

I have only ever had only person who was my "friend" consistently(excluding early elementary school), only problem is, he moved. He is now a 33 year old man, I was his only friend and vise versa. He and I were extremely close.

I was in and out of school due to "behavior problems", I went to different special ed programs. I am now 14 and still have no friends, and don't have any prospects of having a "normal" "friend". Between my genius(yes I know how arrogant and vain that sounds, however it's true) and my "homeschooling" time I have become much more advanced than the average 8th grader. I attend lectures at local universities, write papers for publications and have a wall of textbooks.

After a one year stint in "Special Ed" I went to the 98th percentile gifted class, even though the kids were smart their immaturity annoyed me and separated me from them. Thus, I concluded I can't be friends with people my own age. So, I made a plan to go to college, which I am doing. I was accepted into one of the best High Schools in the Nation, but I decided to peruse college(which I did). This is partly because I don't want to face the social nonacceptance again, and partly because I think being a 22 minus doctor would be awesome.

Point is, I have always regarded myself at a vastly higher level than my age group. I get along with adults great, but I need and want friends at a younger age. I started smoking cannabis with my brother(20) and his friends(mainly one friend of his who is couch surfing here as usual). My brother has been smoking for a long time but never exposed me to it to protecting me. Of course, I took his sneaking around for him not wanting me to be around when he with friends.

A few weeks back, my brother's main friend, "John" called me into my brother's room told me they were "Totally cool" with me hanging out with them and the reason that they sneak around is to protect me. I started smoking three days later. He said we're like family, which I always withed was the case. He has pseudo-lived with me for years. Anyway, since I started smoking his opinion of me has changed.

I now smoke with them nearly every day.


Back, not more digressing. John's brother(1 said to me when I was really, really high(second time) and said that I was really a normal 8th grader and that I should go to high school. John said he thought I was on the "10th/11th grade) maturity level. This has been disturbing me deeply, everyone else I know thinks of me much more mature than that(including my shrink).

What should I do? How do I react to this? I spent a day with 20 seniors(they started with 150 freshmen) from the most academically difficult high school program in the world, yet their immaturity annoyed me. I could be friends with them, yet it was still a problem. When they found out I was in 8th grade they were dumbstruck, they thought I was a transferring senior. I, for example, get along great with teachers, badly with students. So well in fact, one is a prime friend prospect and we've already planned on fishing/hunting together. Of the adults I know, most regard me an adult(not intellectually, no emotionally), for example I am allowed to do field work with a local university, but the professor hasn't even even met my parents. Or, for example, when I talk to people at local universities they think I'm a fellow. Last example, I was at a biological club convention and even the youngest others were over 28, and nobody asked about my parent or age, and I spoke in front of everyone.

Should I grow up fast, go to college and get emancipated when I'm 16, or tough it out?

[Extreme586]

This is a lot to take in, honestly I think by growing up so fast that you are cutting out a portion of your life which you might regret. High school this year for me was a pain but there were little moments that just made it all worth it, thinking about it now these years are going to go by so fast for me, but skipping over them? Honestly I would absolutely hate doing that because of the people that have affected my life in a positive way. As for social non acceptance, I felt a lot of that this year, but also felt it was unnecessarily self inflicted because of my lack of effort. Like I said, I met one person who took an interest in me and no matter how much I didn't respond he just kept doing these little things that made my day and it makes me want to go back and see him again, even if I have to face the awful social aspects of high school. Its definitely a roller coaster, but one that shouldn't be skipped over in my opinion.

[Magenta]

Okay, so I can relate to parts of your post but not others. First off, the not having friends your age. This can be difficult. I'm 16 and a vast majority of my friends are at least ten to twenty years older than me. As well, I have a higher than average maturity (and I'm reluctant to say intelligence level simply because it doesn't matter to me even if it is high) and I'm socially awkward and unsure how to act around people. Thing is, I could be in university right now, studying with much more mature people but I won't. High school is one of those parts of your life that I wouldn't skip. Yes, people are immature and it's infuriating but the younger you learn to get along with people, the easier it is. Your homeschooling probably didn't help with this.

Growing up too fast has its consequences. When you one day find friends, you won't be able to share the common memories with them. I grew up when I was eight years old. When my friends were off having play-dates with their friends at the park, I was at home looking after myself. I hate not being able to share that and I hate being told that I'm the "mum" of the group because I grew up quickly and tend to forget that people my age are not the same as me. While being a doctor at 22 is an achievement, it means you'll have missed out on parts of your life you'll never be able to get back.

Also, emancipation at 16 is no easy life either, I will warn you of that. That was a huge option for me last month but I didn't take it because no matter how mature or smart I am, I can't live on my own because I'm simply not ready. It's hard to live by yourself for even most adults when they first move out. It's not any easier at 16.

(The only part I'm not addressing is the smoking because I do not smoke.)