ive broken, never thought i would go this far

[alley]

i just cut myself.
after months and months of stratches i needed something more painful.
your all right. it does get worse. i started off with biting myself, then stratches lightly, then deeper stratches, and now, ive just cut myself. and it's bleeding.
i cant believe after months of telling myself this would go away its still here, and i cant believe that even though i promised myself i would never cut, i just have.
i just needed more pain. this pain feels so good now.
i know tomorrow i'll regret it. but now i've done this im just going to do it again. and then maybe the cuts will go deep, because im probably going to get worse again.
i really dont know what to do anymore. i've never felt so alone.
rant over.

[FullyAlive]

Seriously tell someone. It's not too late, tell someone, and get help. If you're compelled to hurt yourself, something is wrong and you need some help.

You need to start distracting yourself, when you feel the need to cut again, do something nice, read or write, or sing or something. Or use something else to relieve the urge. Snap an elastic band, draw on your arm in marker, rip up paper or an old shirt. And get rid of what it was you used. That'll make it a lot easier to make this a one time thing.

But just to reiterate you need someone to help you, do you have a counsellor at school? Or a teacher you could talk to?

[grejamjones01]

Seriously tell someone. It's not too late, tell someone, and get help. If you're compelled to hurt yourself, something is wrong and you need some help.

[screamtobeheard]

This is kind of like what happened to me, but not quite. I never thought I'd be able to cut, not that I'd never cut. Similar, but either way. You should really try to get help. Now. Before it gets worse, because it will. Find someone to confide in. Write or draw or do something, anything creative to express yourself when you want to hurt yourself. It's not too late.

[anonymous53]

Tell someone now, before it gets worse. You don't want to get any worse.

[XxMurderedKissesxX]

You really should try talking to someone,
Before things get life threating.
You dont want this to take you over.
Its possible to stop,sometimes people just need help to get there.
Maybe try an elastic band or holding icecubes when you get an urge?

[PoisonedRazorBlades]

As the others have said, you need to tell someone. The cutting does become addictive and you don't want that. It slowly destroys you, trust us on that. Do anything to distract yourself. I personally have never used the elastic band method, or the ice cubes. I try to draw, write or read something. But if that doesn't work then I've been known to move the furniture in my bedroom around. I've also cleaned my room. Or taken all the posters off the walls and put up new posters.

For me its best to keep busy. When I get urges I can't sit still, I have to move about or do something that will keep my hands busy and this usually keeps my mind busy too. I know that exercise helps too and that also releases endorphins and gives you the same kind of contentment. Please do try and talk to someone though. All these methods are ways of distracting yourself in the moment, but they certainly won't make the urge go away and they don't make you any better, they just try to ensure that you don't cause yourself any harm.

[alley]

thank you everyone - currently making a list of possible distractions.
About telling someone...haven't really a clue who, I told my parents before and they didn't care, my few friends that know think it's not big deal, so yeah.

[FullyAlive]

thank you everyone - currently making a list of possible distractions.
About telling someone...haven't really a clue who, I told my parents before and they didn't care, my few friends that know think it's not big deal, so yeah.

Maybe a schoo counselor? Or your GP?
I'm here if you need to talk :)

[User Deleted]

Tell your parents, doctor, counselor, anyone who will be of service. get help like everyone has been saying. You are addicted to cutting already from the sound of it so it will be hard to turn away alone.