ReasonsForWeeping
June 16th, 2011, 11:38 AM
i have tried to kill myself 3 time 2 times with pills my last attempt was with an extension cord yeah i know not the best method ever sense then my life has gone down hill my mom abandoned me and my little brother and sister she lost alot weight she started drinking met some dude on Dungeons and dragons talked 2 this guy for 2 hours said she was going to an art gallery and im like u hate art and shes like no i don't come to find out when i get back from php an out patient thing i was in group basically she cheated on my step dad with a guy not even a hot guy like a really ugly guy im living with my step dad hes more of a dad to me than any other guy in my moms life i like this one he wants to adopt me but he doesn't have the money so i have no idea what going to happen with me my life is idk id rather be in hell right now burning my mom hates me cuz for the first time in my life i can see things the way they are supposed to be and its amazing that no one calls me names or says im worthless i only wish i had my emotions back so i can actually emotionally feel this i think it would overwhelm me so let just wait and see what happens ...i guess my mom didn't want bipolar schizo like me for a kid oh well im smarter than her learn from others mistakes im already doing better than anyone in my family at this point in life hopefully things will get better i just wish i had someone here for instead of myself but depending on myself is the best that's ever going to happen oh well