shitttt sucks.

[Bath]

you know that awkward moment when you cheat on the love of your life three times because you're too young & immature to handle it? and then months later with talking sparingly after you two breakup because of it, you realize you fucking still love him to death and don't know what the fuck to do because you don't want anyone else but him? and hate yourself so deeply for what you did? and know you'll never be forgiven? and that you deserve it?

and you talk to him thinking things are going better but then spill out your guts about how fucking sorry you are AGAIN and he just says "i cant say anything to make you feel better." then gets offline.

AND YOU WANT TO BE MAD BUT CANT BECAUSE HE DID NOTHING WRONG, YOU BROKE HIS HEART.

lol~
life.
/rant

[anonymous53]

Er no... I'm sorry. I don't know what to say besides "you dun fucked up"
I mean, the most you can do is wait and see if he can ever trust you again; it'll never be the same.

[Grayeyes]

Man...
I say you make it up to him. The poor guy... Do something really nice for him. And if he asks, say you're not doing this to get back with him but because you realize what you did was really stupid and you feel bad for what you did.
Or something like that.

[DerBear]

NO i do not know what thats like because i would never do that

you dont deserve him in my books thats as simple as that

[Bath]

lol I agree with all three of you.
after I posted I was like "shit I hope no ones thinking im asking for advice."

I know what I did is wrong. I hate admitting it to myself sometimes, so it felt better to write this.. I feel like a terrible person for it sometimes. he's accepted my apology(s), he just said we can never be together again. which is perfectly reasonable, obviously. but emotions are emotions.

[anonymous53]

Well, respect his wishes then. He doesn't trust you anymore.
Conceal your emotions whilke they're still there, then let them fade.

[RyTwy]

I'd feel grateful that he is even speaking to you. If a girl did that to me, I don't think I'd be able to look her in the face, or even want to hear her name after that...

~Twy xo