Guys who self harm...

[Grey Squirrel]

It seems like the majority of the posts you ever see about self harm is females, and understand that they might be more likely to do this. But I am a guy who has the same problem, and I know there are others. I was in an abusive family relationship growing up, I put up with abuse and all that stuff. But I'm out of it now, and I'll I feel I can do to fit in is to put my self through this physical pain. I have cut my wrists and upper thighs (just so people won't see). Why should I stop though? What's the point? I have no point... And we'll all die anyways. Whats one less person?

Help...

[anonymous53]

It's really not worth it dude. Trust me, I know. The point in living....to find a person you love and live happily ever after and have kids with them :) Yes, we all die. That one less person in the long run is nothing, but think about your family and friends. One of my friends just committed suicide today. All of my friends are in shambles. Everyone is having break downs. Think of how it would affect others.

[SilenceForSilence]

Because your self-inflicted pain isn't helping anyone. Also, If you're trying to hide the cuts, and you are one of few who knows, then you are just building up a bigger wall between yourself and the world, which, if you ended it, would fall greater than if you blended, because the people who were forced away from you, even if it wasn't their fault, would feel responsible. You have unique talents, and so does everyone else. One less person can mean a world of a difference.

[Fiction]

I've heard that the most likely group of people to self harm is girls aged between 13- 15. So I guess that must be why? But there are a lot of guys on here who also self harm...

When asking the question why you should stop, I guess the first thing to consider is why you do it. What is it that you get out of it? Because from what i've found, trying to stop when you're not ready can only end badly. It only makes things worse so I think you have to find the right time to stop.

What's the point in living? Well what's the point in dying? What can you do when you're dead? When you're dead it's all just gone, over, you can't have any impact on anything in the world. You never have the chance to see your future, to see things get better. If you're alive there's always tomorrow to die. Once you're dead there's no going back.

[SilenceForSilence]

Well said, Kathy. That actually helps me explain that to other people, too.

[Dimitri]

Okay bud listen here, I am going to e-mail you something and you better read it. It will explain a lot!!

[adudewhodoesdudes]

I'm a guy who self harms and I do know that feeling of whats the point. My tip is to find someone or something worth living for. I agree with what Rob said life is pretty much about finding that person, the person that likes you for who you really are. There is something that can make life worth living but you have to be alive to find them.

[Spook]

There may be more guys that self harm than you think. Girls are just more of the type to spill their feelings, while guys put on that tough-guy look and brave through it. :D

EDIT: Well, everyone IS different, so it varies.

[Triceratops]

Psychologically speaking, girls are much more sensitive, emotional and are more open about their feelings, whereas guys attempt to block out their emotions as much as possible and try not to approach them. As opposed to feelings of hurt or vulnerbility, guys usually become more hostile or aggressive when they're upset. This is down to human nature and the fact that society's view on male dominance is subconciously inflicted upon us. Males are encouraged to be the mentally and physically "stronger" gender.

There's also a hormone called prolactin which is stronger in women than it is men. Prolactin is found in tears and it contributes to how much people cry. And when someone's crying and is in a complete breakdown, this leads to self-harm.

This isn't to say that there no males who are as equally as emotional as some girls out there, but I'm just speaking on a majority basis. There are loads of males, like yourself, who are lost within an emotional struggle, and turn to self-harm. Especially if they're going through difficult situations in their life such as the death of a friend or family member, being sexually abused, stress, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, bullying, etc. I would definitely say that the amount of girls who self-harm is much higher to the amount of guys, but there are so many guys who do it as well.

And the point of stopping these acts of self-injury are so that they don't continue to progress and worsen into a much more serious problem in the future.

[georgiamay]

I suppose it's a lot more accepted in society for a guy to be more aggressive towards others, but girls are labelled at bitches if the have any outwards agression, so they're more likely to turn it in on themselves. That's just my opinion anyways. And that doesn't mean that guys don't also turn anger and aggression and other negative emotions in on themselves, which often leads to self harm.

There are a lot of guys that self harm, even though it is more common for girls to self harm than guys.